Family Class Sponsorship -- Enforcing the Sponsorship Agreement

[livin]

Hi all. I landed as a PR in January and the relationship was ended a few weeks later. I know by signing the sponsorship agreement, my ex is supposed to be responsible for what I need for up to three years from landing. I'm having a hard time finding out how to enforce this. I've been to immigration and they've told me I need to either get a lawyer to enforce the law, or go on welfare and the government will then go after my ex for any money. I can't afford a lawyer and legal aid does not cover immigration/sponsorship. I don't know if I qualify for welfare but either way, after moving to another country and being force to start my life all over again (still have to import my car, even), I cannot afford the bills that I have right now and my ex is refusing to help.

Does anyone have any information on how to go about enforcing the sponsorship agreement?

You disgust me! I smell a fraudster!

 

[fernendez]

I totally agree with you Fernandez...if it's only been a few weeks, then why don't you just go back to where you came from. This story sounds fishy. Do you know how hard it is to sponsor someone to Canada? All the legitamate people waiting in line to have their files looked at, while a fraudster like you comes and starts talking about getting support and considering welfare. I think there should be a law to get people like you deported!! Totally disgusting! Why don't you try and find a job to see how hard it is to survive!

Livin,I am glad someone has finally seen my point of view. Stories like this is what has made the spouse sponsorship route a problematic one for real relationships.

Stumpedmom,you could have gone through all emotional, financial and physical abuse which I am sorry to hear. Did you deal with it the way Fafi is trying ti go?

 

[louisa]

fafi

Try getting a job or get your family to support you until you find a job.

 

[livin]

Dont know why being a canadian gives you people the right to be obnoxious and pass on judgements. I can fully understand what he/she is going through. This is bc i hav been thru it myself. Let me tell u guys my story. I belong to A country where divorce is considered to b end of life and ppl r dying to come to canada. However that is not how i wanted it. I had a four yr relationship with my husband with whom i was always indifferent of the choice of country in which we wud live eventually. This was bc i had a great job in my country, wanted to live with my family etc . But my husband chose to stay in canada after marriage for the rest of life and i agreed. After marriage however, he didnt apply for immigration. By the way it was an arranged marriage and he kept lying to me and his own family that he has. Finally i came to know about this and then he did. The reason he gave were economic issues. It took sixteen mnths for the visa to come during which i went through an emotional stress and turmoil in my life and faced social pressures and unnecessary wrath of my inlaws alone. Finally when my paper came, he initially said he is under debts so he cant call me now. I sent him money to suport himself and said that i will support myself. He then said that he wanted me to apologise to his mother for some thing in the past before coming here. I just put my foot down and still came to canada to find out why was he stopping me. Also the fact i cudnt have lived there any more, one bc of social pressure and second bc of the fact that imleft my job already.
When i came here, i came to know he is an alcoholic, has girl friends and that is why avoiding me through out. Just like nothing in canada is permanent, had all temp relationships. What he wanted frm me was to hav a permanent realtionship back home for his family and bc of my nice job he wanted me to feed them also as he was spending all his money he earns he on drinks and girls. Plus earns much lesser than his potential bc of his condition. Also present to world theer that i m the wife of their amazing son.
Naturally just like what is mentioned here, my relationship is on verge of divorce and broke in weeks. I initially decided to stay here bc of these factors:
My father will die if i go back, he is already bed ridden
I wanted to help him thru rehabs, aa etc which r only possible if i was here
If nothing wrk, get this relationship to a logical conclusion as nothing is possible by staying there. He is not initiating anything as he is too busy with other activiities
Also if possible try to make a life here bc of 1, 2 and 3 above as opportunities r limited back home

I have been thru fin, emotional and mental abuse thruout this period
He actually owes me a lot of money also

Now i dont intend to go on welfare, my savings r soon to end but hopefully i will be able to get some job.

What my qs is though i hav so far suppressed myself frm taking any revevnge. Do u guys do not think that if that is the only way to enforce default, it is fair for me to take him to task. He shud atleast give me back my money. By the way, it is he who has kicked me out of house and doesnt want to take any responsibility

I pray to god to give me strength to excercise patience and let god do the justice. At the same time, i m also in a dillema if leaving such ppl on their own is like allowing such men and their families to ruin the lives of other girls.

Now do u ppl still think frauds r done by immigrating spouse, it cud be canadian spouse who can do it. Stories like these r common for girls in my country. and its the process of visa etc that shud also be blamed apart frm ourselves who get fooled but in absence of valid info available bc of initial visa probs, we take such foolish decisions.

What do u guys i shud do in such a situation. Give ur opinions pls

First of all, you obviously didn't know him that well before you married him to find out he is an alcoholic after you arrived in Canada. Second of all if you were married in your country, there is no such thing as going after him for money. Thirdly, why would you insist on coming to Canada if he was "avoiding" you? That should have raised an alarm, NO?? You chose to ignore all the signs just to be in Canada...hmm. Just because you are in canada doesn't mean you should put him through hell! What if there was no such thing as support or welfare, what whould you do then? Revenge is not the answer.

I was in a relationship with a man for 7 years, who basically used me financially. After i kicked him out, I could have gone after him for support since we were living common law, but i didn't, because i wanted to show him that i can survive without his money . Why don't you show the man that you can survive without him? I know it's hard, but it is such a great feeling to know that life goes on without him. I hate seeing women that act sooo needy. You have to show him what time it is!!

 

[Indigo]

raabia88 is not the same person as the topic starter. She stated that she doesn't want to go on welfare and wants to get a job.

Please let's not judge too quickly.
People do end up in situations we can't even imagine. We can only work with what information we get from the person who asked the question. It is often not enough to fully assess a situation, but that doesn't mean that person is actually lying.

Can you imagine what it must be like being an immigration officer? You basically judge people based on limited information. It must be a tough job...

 

[sheila la]

It's simple, go back home to your family. I find it hard to believe that weeks into Canada and the relationship breaks down. Maybe it wasn't that serious from the get go.

Or find a job.

As far as raabia88, you saw the signs long before you came here and yet you still chose to come. Canadian taxpayers should not pay for your refusing to accept what was truth. I know we all make mistakes and we all hope the best, but when the best is telling you to stay home, you stay home.

You both need to cut your losses and move on and learn to support yourselves.

 

[livin]

raabia88 is not the same person as the topic starter. She stated that she doesn't want to go on welfare and wants to get a job.

Please let's not judge too quickly.
People do end up in situations we can't even imagine. We can only work with what information we get from the person who asked the question. It is often not enough to fully assess a situation, but that doesn't mean that person is actually lying.

Can you imagine what it must be like being an immigration officer? You basically judge people based on limited information. It must be a tough job...

ok, i guess i replied to both of them lol

 

[livin]

When did i say i m going on social assistance? I m saying i need my money back. Here or there, i m good enough to support myself, dont need that advice. By the way, pr has all the rights as that of a citizen so u cant treat immigrating spouses differently. My point was to ask for opinion that what is the way to enforce someone to honor its contractual obligation and what is a right moral stance, be forgiving or an eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth. As for coming over here, how can u guys deny someones right to come if he or she has been authorised by govt of canada. In my case whether i chose to stay long or not, i had to come to find out the actual truth. And also to ensure even if there is any chance of saving the marriage.

Instead of asking us these questions, why don't you pick up the phone and contact the government of canada for advise regarding the contractual obligation since they are the ones who authorized you to immigrate?? Simple...

 

[smokijoe]

It is really easy to judge someone when you have not been in their position.

Don't get me wrong, I can understand all the talk about being an economic immigrant and all that but we do not know the history of this case and we should not judge without the facts.

All I will say on this topic is that these things do happen and sometimes we are not aware that they are going in that direction. I have a friend who left her country to join her fiancee in the USA, when she got there she was a prisoner in the apt, treated like dirt. She stole his money, bought a ticket and fled.

The author is only asking a question as to what her rights are and how she can enforce them, although I think she is going a bit far by stating she has to import her car. The sponsor is only responsible for her living expenses, eg food, clothing, shelter, health care etc.

She has a few choices, find a job, go on welfare and then let the govt pursue the sponsor, or go back home.

I do not understand why she should be given so much hassle by us members of this forum during her time of need.

Just remember it could be us in her position.

 

[Stumpedmom]

Livin...you are comparing 2 different cases....in the 2nd case you keep quoting...if you read her posts, if she returns there will be major consequences to her by society and her spouses family...

Divorce is not an acceptable situation in some cultures...

Also you say that she should have seen the signs before going through this, and did not know her spouse very well before marriage...

It was an arranged marriage as she states....

A lot of people are passing judgement on these people without knowing the whole story....Abuse is abuse is abuse if that is the cause of the breakup and in this thread the OP still has not clarified who broke the relationship up....so jumping to conclusions that they are in a MOC is just rude and uncaring when people come here for advice...not only that its not like they are coming for a better life, as the OP is from the usa!!

 

[locolynn]

Oh Yay! We're playing my favorite game - The Self Ritcheous Dichotomy!

On one side we have all the "good" people, who are coming to Canada for the "right" reasons, and are only in "genuine" relationships. You can recognize them by the stones they are casting. Likes: passing judgements, burning torches and lynch mobs. They're a fun group.

On the other side: The "bad" people - those who were either stupid enough to fall in love with a scammer, or those who have asked a question, made a statement, or a life choice that dared to step out of the carefully crafted black and white lines drawn by the "good" people. These people are OBVIOUSLY NOT in "genuine relationships" and can are easily recognizable by the fact that they are rubbing their hands together and laughing maniacally.


Locolynn

 

[Kedeisha]

Oh Yay! We're playing my favorite game - The Self Ritcheous Dichotomy!

On one side we have all the "good" people, who are coming to Canada for the "right" reasons, and are only in "genuine" relationships. You can recognize them by the stones they are casting. Likes: passing judgements, burning torches and lynch mobs. They're a fun group.

On the other side: The "bad" people - those who were either stupid enough to fall in love with a scammer, or those who have asked a question, made a statement, or a life choice that dared to step out of the carefully crafted black and white lines drawn by the "good" people. These people are OBVIOUSLY NOT in "genuine relationships" and can are easily recognizable by the fact that they are rubbing their hands together and laughing maniacally.


Locolynn

I love ur statement

And to people who easily "smell" a MOC don't assume your relationship is genuine : and others are not based on the limited info they give

 

[locolynn]

I love ur statement

And to people who easily "smell" a MOC don't assume your relationship is genuine : and others are not based on the limited info they give

Exactly. Stay on this board long enough and you'll run across scores of people who were in a "genuine" relationship and not afraid to say it over and over and over again - then....SURPRISE.

Funny how you rarely see one of the senior members going off about "genuine relationships..."

Lynn

 

[fernendez]

Exactly. Stay on this board long enough and you'll run across scores of people who were in a "genuine" relationship and not afraid to say it over and over and over again - then....SURPRISE.

Funny how you rarely see one of the senior members going off about "genuine relationships..."

Lynn

Guys, no one is throwing stones but we are been factual. You don't expect everyone in a forum to agree on a topic like this. I sympathize with those in situations like this. Some people are in genuine relationships and it goes wrong no doubt, but that is a self embarked on harm as compared to arranged marriages. Some cultures are just barbaric, how can cousins be marrying each other etc. That is nothing but incest. My point on this topic is this, the sponsored person is now in Canada, a land of opportunities, why not look for a job even if it is a survival job and start a new life than start haunting the fingers that brought you to this Country. See the future and not past. If everyone does this, this system will crash.

 

[AllisonVSC]

Oh Yay! We're playing my favorite game - The Self Ritcheous Dichotomy!

On one side we have all the "good" people, who are coming to Canada for the "right" reasons, and are only in "genuine" relationships. You can recognize them by the stones they are casting. Likes: passing judgements, burning torches and lynch mobs. They're a fun group.

On the other side: The "bad" people - those who were either stupid enough to fall in love with a scammer, or those who have asked a question, made a statement, or a life choice that dared to step out of the carefully crafted black and white lines drawn by the "good" people. These people are OBVIOUSLY NOT in "genuine relationships" and can are easily recognizable by the fact that they are rubbing their hands together and laughing maniacally.


Locolynn

There needs to be a thread called "Best Forum Member Quotes" because this one rises well beyond "Best Quote of the Week" to compete for "Best Quote of the YEAR"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There should also be a flag or something for "most interesting reads." First, I enjoyed how the discussion of the either/or scenario posed by the OP played out. Second, diplomacy reigned. Carefully worded moderating and thoughtful comments kept the discussion on track so locolynn could join in on a round of her favourite game and share her keen wit and insight!