Request application rejection

[annabruce]

How come I don't come across those kind of south asians? Every single person that I know including my self chose to fly in that part of the world to find a better half and I am glad that I did that. I know many guys from the same ethnic origin and born and raised here and still go freely to india or pakistan for marriage. I guess it would be hard for you to understand without knowing the culture and other values and that's what shamshia was trying to explain.
As that been said, I agree there are handful of cases where parents force their kids to marry someone from backhome and things go really bad. There are nutbegs in all communities and I wouldn't judge everyone based on that.

It isn't necessarily pressure to marry a particular person, but rather a pressure to not inter-marry. Consequently, they are forced to go home to find a spouse due to reduced options in Canada.

I experienced this directly with an Iranian woman that I was interested in 8 years ago. Different country, I know, but similar issue.

A good friend of mine lost his long-term girlfriend due to pressure from her father who refused to tolerate inter-marriage between a Canadian and a Chinese woman.

 

[newdelhi2011]

So I guess now we are talking about intercultural, interracial marriage. As you said, other cultures such as middle eastern, asian prefer to marry within their community. I have a white canadian friend who went through hell to marry a jamacian b/f. Her parents and gradparents stopped talking to her because they didn't want her to marry outside their comfort zone and same thing applies to other cultures.
What you have said is so true for 2nd generation of immigrant families here and it will take a while before things change.

 

[annabruce]

NewDelhi, I bring up all these issues only to make the point that we can't judge the OP. Any number of issues may exist. We don't know!!

Therefore, we can only provide an answer to the legal issue. It he doesn't want her, he must report it to immigration.

 

[newdelhi2011]

True. Too many unknowns in their equation. Let's leave them alone. I will pray for both that they find peace in whatever they do.

 

[hsbalouch]

I was just reading about a woman who was murdered by a father - a father who justifies this murder, and calls it an honour killing! When I read comments like what some of you have written, this is what I think about. People like this, can get the hell out of MY country! People like this, should never enter MY country!

now you are assuming again that i would think this way or that way!

I have the same question, what is wrong with you?
now you have brought a totally different issue which has nothing to do with this argument but just to WIN people like you would come up with anything, I am afraid your next post is gonna be even more caustic and irrespective, every society has its flaws, no one is perfect I can give you many examples in your society which goes totally against the simple ethical or moral values but thing is my point here is not to win or show some one in poor light.
I just expressed myself when I thought I should!
I will leave you here alone now before you feel more pain about YOUR COUNTRY!

 

[annabruce]

now you are assuming again that i would think this way or that way!

My assumptions are based on your own words. I am judging in the same way you are judging the OP. I judge by your own horrible words.

"I think OP is a liar and he posted this just for fun or seek some attention from people, if he really wanted to withdraw he could have asked it straightaway, why trying to be cool that he didnt have any feelings for her, if not then why gor married at first place? I bet he is some sick minded hell bound idiot !!!"

I am providing you with several examples of people who use culture/religion to justify horrible behavior. I do this because as far as I am concerned YOU have been using culture/religion to justify your own horrible words. This is not acceptable.

Look people, let me make it very simple for you. None of us know anything about this couple. We are wrong to make any negative statements about the choices they make in their life. We must restrict our comments to what is appropriate based on current immigration law.

Simply stated: If he doesn't want this woman, he must report this to immigration. He asked if he can request a rejection. The answer is he MUST if he doesn't want this woman.

 

[AAL1984]

How come I don't come across those kind of south asians? Every single person that I know including my self chose to fly in that part of the world to find a better half and I am glad that I did that. I know many guys from the same ethnic origin and born and raised here and still go freely to india or pakistan for marriage. I guess it would be hard for you to understand without knowing the culture and other values and that's what shamshia was trying to explain.
As that been said, I agree there are handful of cases where parents force their kids to marry someone from backhome and things go really bad. There are nutbegs in all communities and I wouldn't judge everyone based on that.

What are you talking about?

I don't know about India, but I know lots of young (mid to late 20's) Pakistani guys born and raised in Canada/America or those who grew up here, most are probably going to marry another Muslim from North America, as they find these are the people they are most compatible with. Those guys are no different from me, their just like any other Canadian or American person.

Just because your parents are from a certain country, it doesn't mean anything. Those of us born and raised in North America have more in common with North American culture rather than the countries of our parents. I've been to a the wedding of a few of my Pakistani male friends in Houston, all of the girls were also Pakistani Americans, and some were Arab American, one was White American convert to Islam, as per Islam as long as the person is Muslim it's ok.

Again you are just assuming way too much. Things are rarely ever black and white.

 

[shamsia]

Imagine this: You are working at a pharmacy, and a person walks into the store and takes two bottles of sleeping pills. Do you bill it and go "20 dollars"? and that's the end of it. Or do you add something like "Don't do anything stupid, eh?"

Your immigration and legal advice ends here -- "20 dollars"
Our cultural/religious rant starts here -- "Don't do anything stupid, eh?"

Now why we said what we did, what prompted us to say it in our different ways, why we cant shut up and be indifferent to it all makes us the people we are.

Actually, if the OP had just asked a simple question on how to withdraw the application would not have sparked this debate. When you let out the reasons on a public forum, people are bound to comment on it.

 

[AAL1984]

My assumptions are based on your own words. I am judging in the same way you are judging the OP. I judge by your own horrible words.

"I think OP is a liar and he posted this just for fun or seek some attention from people, if he really wanted to withdraw he could have asked it straightaway, why trying to be cool that he didnt have any feelings for her, if not then why gor married at first place? I bet he is some sick minded hell bound idiot !!!"

I am providing you with several examples of people who use culture/religion to justify horrible behavior. I do this because as far as I am concerned YOU have been using culture/religion to justify your own horrible words. This is not acceptable.

Look people, let me make it very simple for you. None of us know anything about this couple. We are wrong to make any negative statements about the choices they make in their life. We must restrict our comments to what is appropriate based on current immigration law.

Simply stated: If he doesn't want this woman, he must report this to immigration. He asked if he can request a rejection. The answer is he MUST if he doesn't want this woman.

Thank you AnnaBruce.

 

[AAL1984]

Imagine this: You are working at a pharmacy, and a person walks into the store and takes two bottles of sleeping pills. Do you bill it and go "20 dollars"? and that's the end of it. Or do you add something like "Don't do anything stupid, eh?"

Your immigration and legal advice ends here -- "20 dollars"
Our cultural/religious rant starts here -- "Don't do anything stupid, eh?"

Now why we said what we did, what prompted us to say it in our different ways, why we cant shut up and be indifferent to it all makes us the people we are.

Actually, if the OP had just asked a simple question on how to withdraw the application would not have sparked this debate. When you let out the reasons on a public forum, people are bound to comment on it.

I think it would be considered highly unprofessional for any pharmacist to say to a customer "Don't do anything stupid" maybe that happens in India, but I assure you if you say that to any Canadian customer they will consider it highly insulting and complain to the store manager.

 

[shamsia]

I think it would be considered highly unprofessional for any pharmacist to say to a customer "Don't do anything stupid" maybe that happens in India, but I assure you if you say that to any Canadian customer they will consider it highly insulting and complain to the store manager.

My point exactly! See the difference in cultures? To you its "unprofessional", to us its "concern". And no, I do not expect you to understand that.

 

[AAL1984]

My point exactly! See the difference in cultures? To you its "unprofessional", to us its "concern". And no, I do not expect you to understand that.

Yes but you are just assuming the OP shares your values, they may not. They may have a completely different cultural and religious out look than you, you have no idea what religion (if any )they are, you have no idea what cultural values they adhere too, you are just assuming. They could be born and raised in Canada/America and share the cultural norms of North American culture. All people raised here have more in common with each other than the countries of their parents/grandparents.

Stop assuming stuff, you're mistake is you are judging the OP as if he was some dude you know very well from your neighborhood in New Dehli, he isn't.

 

[annabruce]

My point exactly! See the difference in cultures? To you its "unprofessional", to us its "concern". And no, I do not expect you to understand that.

Apples and oranges! One is genuine concern, the other is condemnation!

And you still don't get it: YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THESE PEOPLE!

 

[scarycemetery]

To me it sounds like being realistic. I love my boyfriend to death but if I had to be apart from him for years after trying to be together, eventually the relationship would die. You can't have a real relationship where there is no end to the distance in sight. Two people can't build a life together when one is half way across the world.

I don't think that's true. If you really love someone then you would do whatever it takes to be with that person, even if it means being apart for a few years. True love can withstand anything, and that's part of this process.

 

[AAL1984]

I don't think that's true. If you really love someone then you would do whatever it takes to be with that person, even if it means being apart for a few years. True love can withstand anything, and that's part of this process.

That might be true for you, but to me that sounds like something out of a Hollywood fantasy. Sometimes one has to be real and practical regardless of how much you love some one.