ON THE LIGHTER SIDE: Paranoia during the "wait"

[ready_fi_move_on]

Spanish Computer
A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.''Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups,male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer'should be a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine('el computador'), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won. Lol

dead* omg i love this page yall make me laugh thanks

 

[moochops]

To span any cultural divide I normally get out the alcohol. After a few no-one can understand each other anyway

 

[CanadianJeepGuy]

To span any cultural divide I normally get out the alcohol. After a few no-one can understand each other anyway

LOL. It is the great equalizer.

 

[parker24]

Bahahahahaha! I love that you got cocky and then stepped in it like that. My tutor makes sure to point it out when I switch out words...which she needs to do, of course, but we get a lot of giggles out of it. "Suis-je sale?" ("Am I dirty?" I had mixed up lever and laver, and mistakenly told her to wash herself, not to stand up.)

At least french is becoming less "slippery" to my brain. It took my husband a WEEK (yes, a week, though it was a vacation week, so I drank away a lot of brain cells in that time) to teach me my first french phrase, "Je ne comprends pas." As soon as the words left my mouth, I forgot them. "Joo no clomprey pah? What was it again?" This morning, I was looking for the stapler, and I was muttering to myself..."Où est mon...mon..." (haven't used that word since learning it in the first part of my first french course, probably back in October) "...mon...AGRAFEUSE!!!!!!!!!!!" Screaming out "STAPLER" in french got me a weird look from the husband, too.

Because of my hearing loss, I pronounce words VERY badly in French and usually need correction. I volunteer in a French Immersion Kindergarten class, the teacher and I are good friends, she corrects me often haha. Today I'm trying to tell the very rambunctious boys to s'asseoir on the tapis... Instead what came out (after 10 minutes of them being rowdy) "ASSATRIOS!" The teacher looked at me and we stared at each other for one second and burst out laughing. What a long day.

 

[QuebecOkie]

Because of my hearing loss, I pronounce words VERY badly in French and usually need correction. I volunteer in a French Immersion Kindergarten class, the teacher and I are good friends, she corrects me often haha. Today I'm trying to tell the very rambunctious boys to s'asseoir on the tapis... Instead what came out (after 10 minutes of them being rowdy) "ASSATRIOS!" The teacher looked at me and we stared at each other for one second and burst out laughing. What a long day.

Hahahahahaha! I don't have any hearing loss to blame, though my ear is not at all attuned to french. I guess I CAN blame living in Oklahoma for most of my life. I'm lucky I speak decent english!

I have a lot of trouble with the french "r". I sometimes gurgle to myself, trying to roll my r's, as I sit around the house or drive around running errands. My "toi" and "trois" and "fois" and "froid" are sometimes indistinguishable. :

 

[Iay]

Hahahahahaha! I don't have any hearing loss to blame, though my ear is not at all attuned to french. I guess I CAN blame living in Oklahoma for most of my life. I'm lucky I speak decent english!

I have a lot of trouble with the french "r". I sometimes gurgle to myself, trying to roll my r's, as I sit around the house or drive around running errands. My "toi" and "trois" and "fois" and "froid" are sometimes indistinguishable. :

ohh that rolling "R" sound. I think I almost choke myself practicing this one.

 

[CanadianJeepGuy]

ohh that rolling "R" sound. I think I almost choke myself practicing this one.

Rolling "R"?? Sure you aren't trying to speak Scottish??

Ask a french person to say "This, that and the other thing." in English. Thats a good laugh.

 

[Iay]

Rolling "R"?? Sure you aren't trying to speak Scottish??

Ask a french person to say "This, that and the other thing." in English. Thats a good laugh.

Well, I should have said the gargling "R".

 

[Steph C]

I shouldn't provoke you guys.. but it's Friday and I'm feeling a bit daring.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/mar/01/quebec-language-police-ban-pasta

And guys, if you want to learn Canadian French properly you have to learn the holy trinity of swear words and use them profusely as adjectives. Just sayin' :

 

[CanadianJeepGuy]

I shouldn't provoke you guys.. but it's Friday and I'm feeling a bit daring.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/mar/01/quebec-language-police-ban-pasta

And guys, if you want to learn Canadian French properly you have to learn the holy trinity of swear words and use them profusely as adjectives. Just sayin' :

You are so going to get me kicked outta this site....

This nonsense is nothing new to me. Canada already has one culture that refuses to move out of the stone age that we will be forever paying for. Provincialism can no longer last in a world that is so familiar with its global existence as a daily occurance.

 

[Steph C]

You are so going to get me kicked outta this site....

then I would have to get a life!

 

[truesmile]

... already scoping out French Immersion schools (turns out there's plenty) . . . If you can't beat'em, join'em...

 

[Steph C]

... already scoping out French Immersion schools (turns out there's plenty) . . . If you can't beat'em, join'em...

It's a smart idea! My parents looked into putting me into the local immersion school. I was denied because neither of my parents are Francophone.

 

[parker24]

... already scoping out French Immersion schools (turns out there's plenty) . . . If you can't beat'em, join'em...

I love them. I already told Mr P that our kids are DEFINITELY going to French Immersion. He agreed (It'd be nice if they could get a nice cushy job with a pension so they can help us when we're old and frail )

 

[Steph C]

then I would have to get a life!

Oh lol I thought you were talking about me not you. I have work brain.

To my fellow whisky drinkers: let's have a moment of silence..
http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Whisky+away+Massive+spill+Chivas+distillery+sends+spirits/8035120/story.html