Habibti said:
Ok... I snap! I am losing it! Another Saturday night crying my heart out. I had a difficult conversation on msn with my husband that lasted no more than 15 minutes or so. It was my time of the week with him as we work out of the house Monday to Friday, and the time difference make it difficult to connect. Usually we send each other emails every day, sometimes twice a day but this week almost nothing from him. Last weekend he was away and I did not know. He was so upset with family matters that he did not think to let me know. He also lost his mobile phone and there was no way to contact me once he was in the countryside at his grand-parents house. Things that matter to me last weekend and this week (like the new workplaces) went unnoticed. I sent him emails but he barely answered them, not in a satisfactory manner, like he did not pay attention to what I wrote.
I wrote him on Thursday my lunch time and I got no reply from him that day and nothing yesterday Friday. Then, we had this time on msn. At the beginning of the week, he told me in a email he feels sad and depressed and I should give him some time in order for him to regain his stability. Today I told him I feel sad and depressed too and it was not fair to me! And pulling away from me makes things twice harder on me. On top of that, I have to work my ass off to defend him with Immigration and to have enough money to visit him all summer. More and more I feel people rejecting me because they find it weird my husband is not with me. I hear the rumors and people talking about me... "her husband is using her to enter Canada".... "once he is here he will divorce her"... etc. Even this kind of comments my son and his friends. I see these people having a normal life with their spouse.
On this Forum, I constantly read about other people who have successful interview, who have their visa, who have the VO requesting medicals, who are landing in Canada, who are approved without interview, etc. I am truly happy for them, but I feel also left out. Like I do not belong, like I am not normal.
My dear husband said: "Do you think it is a good idea to complain to me when I have serious problems?" I said: "Ok... I heard you. I have nothing else to say". Then, he said: "I am going to sleep" and left msn.
I am one inch from giving up!
Hi
i really really do understand you and your pain,but we should know the whole story,why your husband is depressed,you can't have a good relationship if there is no good communication,you can solve everything with good communication,,,and tell me how long has he been waiting for his visa?if the process is taking time,he should go into CIC website and look at other VO in the other countries,where it takes sometimes 27months,,,since your file is at the embassy here in Rabat,then what's the problem??????if i tell you about my story you will see why i said i do understand you,and i can say also i do understand him,
im a Moroccan who is married with a Canadian woman from Newfoundland,we sent in out first application on June 2010,and i keep telling my wife at that time to check on it,she was calling them and they couldn't give her an answer,because they couldn't see it on their system,,,and my wife was talking to her friends and they told her it's normal it takes so long,,,but i told her,no it's not normal,in Mississauga it only takes between a month and 3 month,,,but she wasn't listening,and i asked her to go and see her MP and she said,he is an idiot,,,so it took us one year to realize that the first application has been lost,and we started another one,that we sent last October,and this time she called them many times last January and they said she has been approved to sponsor me,i asked her to call them many times to get to talk to different agents and see what they say,they have said similar answers,and they gave her a file number,and they said they have sent her a letter,but she never gets any letter,and here too in Morocco,i haven't gotten any acknowledgement of reception from the Visa Office ,,,i started being worried,and i am worried right now,and i told my wife,and she said she is sure that everything is fine this time,,,but i really can't relax because i need to see it with my own eyes,i mean i need to get a letter as an AOR from the VO,telling me they have my file,,,my wife is a very nice woman and i do love her so so so much,and i know she loves me more,,,lol,,,but her only problem is that i always feel like i have to keep asking her to do things,especially when it comes to immigration stuffs,,,well right now,i don't know what to do,because i heard that sometimes the VO don't send any letter or anything,,,
anyway what im trying to tell you is that we are married since march 2010,it been 2 years now,,,so you can imagine,,,and my wife was here last November and December we had 36 days together here in my country,,,
don't listen too much to your friends and these people who are saying that your husband is gonna leave you once he got there,,,not all Moroccans are like that,,,and you have to know that you can't stop people from talking,they are free to say whatever they want,,,
i hear similar things here too,,,just 4 days ago,a woman who is a family for me,she said,that Canadians women now prefer to get married to Moroccan men and leave them in their country(Morocco)and use them for fun when they come here for vacancy,,,she was talking about me,because she asked my aunt why im still here and i haven't gotten my visa yet,and when my aunt said,im still waiting,she answered here that way,,,and i hear things like that all the time,but i know it's not true,,,,and as i said,people are sick to be honest,,,lol,,,i can't stop them talking and i can't make them shut their mouth up,i do trust my wife and i know we need allot of patience with the immigration process,,,if you were married because of true and strong love,then you are supposed to promised each other to never give up
i do believe that sometimes your government and the immigration make the process so long on purpose ,so they can see if a couple can survive this long waiting or no,so they can be sure they are really married for real and not only for visa,,,
i really hope my message made you feel a little better,i wish i could say more,,but please try and talk to your husband and ask him what's wrong,,and he has to be honest too and talk to you about it,,,i dont want you to think about giving up,keep thinking about the good things in your husband and the good moment and memories you had with him,and you can ask your self,does he worth it or no,,,,
you have a good night