Sponsoring husband from Morocco

[locolynn]

Medical requested!!!! OMG it is finally happening.

Alhamdulillah!!!

Lynn

 

[ddobro2]

Congrats Is this the second medical you'd be doing?

Medical requested!!!! OMG it is finally happening.

Alhamdulillah!!!

Lynn

 

[locolynn]

Arg! They just sent another email and said WAIT! Argh!!! At least we know they are working on our case...

It can't just be easy can it!?!

Ddobro2: mmmm it's actually our 4th . After our 1st medical expired we did 2 more, even though they hadn't requested them...so if we had just waited (like they patiently suggested many times) it would be his second, lol!

Lynn

 

[aziz2010]

hi all guys again it has been long time ago that i have not been here by the way i found my missing applications they started processing it and undertaking and applications to sponsor was missing my wife forgot to send them with application so they mailed returned whole package to morocco, requesting missing form also they sent us letter with label where to mail them to the officer who started processing it, so i printed missing form and sent it back to my wife with whole package to canada so she already mailed them 3 weeks ago via express so now they have it 2 weeks ago i think returned file it does not take long to process what do you think ?? how long do you think they would take to process returned file ?? looking forward hearing from you.

your best friend

 

[mrandmrsromero]

Lynn I'm following your posts and have my fingers & toes crossed that you are in the home stretch now!!!! Your patience is incredible (and catching...I think I took your zen vibe a little too seriously...I am about to finish my yoga teaching certification LOL!)

 

[FatimZahra]

Medical requested!!!! OMG it is finally happening.

Alhamdulillah!!!

Lynn

Congrats!! Fingers crossed!!!

 

[hayati]

Medical requested!!!! OMG it is finally happening.

Alhamdulillah!!!

Lynn

Wow congratulation Lynn, iam so happy for you and wish you all the best, I've been following your story for some time and this really makes me happy for you

 

[ddobro2]

I've got to say, you're handling it better than I would. How can they email you to do another medical (I take it #3 was done more than a year ago), and then re-email you to say in fact you need to wait. So they messed up on giving you the correct cue. I really hope you are finally done with all of this crap this year.

Arg! They just sent another email and said WAIT! Argh!!! At least we know they are working on our case...

It can't just be easy can it!?!

Ddobro2: mmmm it's actually our 4th . After our 1st medical expired we did 2 more, even though they hadn't requested them...so if we had just waited (like they patiently suggested many times) it would be his second, lol!

Lynn

 

[locolynn]

I've got to say, you're handling it better than I would. How can they email you to do another medical (I take it #3 was done more than a year ago), and then re-email you to say in fact you need to wait. So they messed up on giving you the correct cue. I really hope you are finally done with all of this crap this year.

Lol! I'm trying!! If I have learned anything in these 4.5 years it's that getting upset and freaking out only gets me angry and crazy. It does absolutely nothing else. So I may as well get my zen on and chill out. They are working on it and will get to it soon I hope!

Lynn

 

[locolynn]

Lynn I'm following your posts and have my fingers & toes crossed that you are in the home stretch now!!!! Your patience is incredible (and catching...I think I took your zen vibe a little too seriously...I am about to finish my yoga teaching certification LOL!)

Thanks and congratulations on your yoga certification!! That really is ZEN!

Lynn

 

[amira00]

Hello everyone! I have been reading the latest posts on here. Many have written me to see what had happened between my husband and I. It has been a very emotional and devastating time for me and my 12 yr old daughter, 24 yr old son and 26 yr old daughter. I sponsored my husband here in April/2010 and was so happy until he got here. The day he landed is the day I found out what a liar he was. He had asked me to pay for his plane ticket from Montreal to where I live in BC as his parents did not have a credit card to purchase the ticket. I agreed but had to borrow my son's card as I did not have any money in which to do it. He was aware my son was doing this and reassured me several times he would bring the money to give back to him when he got here. Well I found out that night that he did not bring any money, he just shrugged his shoulders when I asked him what I was to do? I owe my son this money. He said he did not want to ask his father for it as he paid for the ticket from Morocco to Montreal. We had agreed before hand that I had paid for the wedding and stuff and immigration papers his family would pay for the flight over here. So we started off badly. Things got worse as they went along, although I did many things to try to work things out, I tried to work through the fact that he had lied to me to start with. He never wanted to talk about the problems we were having. I work 12 hr shifts 4 days a week and if I wanted to work an overtime shift he told me he did not want me leaving my 12 yr old daughter at home that I need to take her to my Moms, (my 24 yr old son also lived with us as he was going to college.) as he was not comfortable with her there and she played her music too loud. I would not do this as this was her home before he came along and my son was there to also keep an eye on her. My Mom had been watching my daughter since she was 3 months old and she enjoyed being able to stay home in her own bed. I would take her to my Mom for the 4 days I worked and then she would come home when I was off, so having a "Dad" there was great for her. I thought it was great not having to rely on my Mom so much anymore. Then he started to become less affectionate with me and when I hugged him he would not hug me back,when I asked him about it he would laugh at me. He would do prayer in our bedroom and it did not matter if I was in there relaxing and watching tv, he wanted he tv muted, then 20 mins or so later I was able to unmute the tv and finish watching my show. It was expected of me, not even asked if it was ok. Then he also tried to tell me what clothes I could wear, even to go wash my face. I would tell him he is in Canada and I would dress how I wanted to, I respected his culture while I was in Morocco and he needed to respect my culture here in Canada. This is a very different man then the one I knew on the internet or spent a month with in Morocco. Still I stuck it out and tried to work out things, then one day in Feb/2011 he told me that he didn't really want to marry me in the first place. I was so devastated to hear that, I asked why did he marry me then? He said that I had gone over there and spent all this money, so he married me. I told him we had agreed that when I came over and we hit it off we would get married if not I had a nice friend in a foreign country. I told him then that leads me to believe that he used me to get into this country. He said no he came here for me, I said no you came here because of me. Now I know he married me to get into Canada. After trying to deal with this situation I told my husband that I wanted a divorce and that I was moving him out of my room and into my daughters room and she would stay in my room with me. So I move him in to her room where he had a bed, dresser ,tv,dvd and anything else he wanted in there. I told him i would look after him for the next 2 ear and then he would have to find a place of his own as my obligation would be up. I told him that I could not afford for him to leave and go on Social Assistance as I could lose everything I had, my home and truck. (I had claimed bankruptcy 5 yrs ago due to one of my kids.) He agreed he would stay knowing this and that I could not afford it if he left. Things were going fine, we hardly spoke to each other, but I would check on him when I came home from work to see how his day was, but he would hardly say anything to me. I would drive him to the bus stop in the mornings on my days off and he would catch the handi-dart bus home. A couple of times he called me from a store near by saying he had been out with friends and ask me to come and get him, I freaked out a bit as he was supposed to be picked up and dropped off by the handi-dart bus, they had called me and stated he had done that twice now and if he did it again he would loose the service. We need that service due to my job and my up coming surgery. We got into an argument over that and he told me f**k you! Well on May 17, I was leaving for work (7:00 pm) and my husband called to say he was out with his friend and would be home later, I said ok, I will see you in the morning. ( I worked a 7:30-7:30 night shift) At about 7:45 after I was at work I got a call from my son saying " I think "he" is leaving? I asked what he was talking about, he said my husbands friends were there and they were taking all his stuff. I told my son to let me talk to him. He went to get him and told me that he was gone already. I asked my son if they took the scooter, he went and look and told me it was gone. I was devastated and crying so hysterically at work, I was not able to do my job, my partner worked with the people and I did the paper work in the office. I was scheduled for my surgery on May 19. My husband made sure he took his wheelchair, scooter, and other things when he left, some things that were not even his. I spoke with the police and changed all the locks on the doors, but could do nothing about the things he took. My husband did not call me for over a week to see how I was doing or to say he was ok. I told him to bring back the scooter but he refused, saying it was his. I had just finished paying it off. He would not tell me where he was , saying it was none of my business, but the first thing he did was apply for Social Assistance. He knew what it would do to me and did not care. I think one of the worst things was when my daughter and I went to clean up the room he was in and found all the fathers days gifts she had made him in school, left behind. I could see how upset she was. I have had problems with my daughter because of this and the debt I will owe to the government. (She is getting counseling at school and I was contacted by the Councillor and informed that this has had impact on her. It breaks my heart to know I have done this to my child. She absolutely hates him now.)

I tried to get my husband to sign a release of information for Social Assistance so I could find out how much money they were paying him and he refused again telling me saying it was none of my business. You see the Release of Information in the Sponsorship Agreement is only valid with the Federal Government and does not apply to any of the Provinces, but the Sponsorship Agreement that we both signed is valid and will be upheld in any Province. There is no protection for me as a Sponsor, but the Government will bend over backwards to help the person who Immigrated to Canada, even when they committed fraud to get here. Go figure! I want to know what my Government is going to do to help me, I was willing to uphold my part of the sponsorship agreement and let my husband continue living here and look after him until my obligation was finished. He was the one that chose to leave, now what do I do??
Well I just got a letter in the mail from the Ministry of Finance - Non Tax Collections Management Office that I have balance owing of $7834.26 with an interest rate of prime + 3% because I signed an undertaking with the Federal Government and promised to support my relative for a period of 3 years to help them settle in Canada and that my relative would not require provincial income assistance. By signing the undertaking, I acknowledged that any provincial income assistance paid to my sponsored relative would be a debt I owed to the province. Hmmm. I never thought it would end up like this, I would never have done this had I known it would end up like this, I trusted and love him so much. My heart is so broken.
I guess the other thing I should tell everyone is that my husband is a paraplegic and in a wheelchair, but that did not matter to me cause I fell in love with this man because of what he had in his heart, or what I thought he had in his heart. He changed a lot since coming to Canada and had a hard time adjusting to our culture. He wanted things to be as they were in Morocco, even his Moroccan friends here tried to tell him thing were different here and that he need to realize that. The amount he gets for Social Assistance is much higher because he is disabled.
Oh I forgot to mention he knew about Social Assistance before coming over here, actually he knew a lot of things about Canada before coming here, I did not find out just how much until after he was here. Also he is well versed in computers also and was able to access his computer over in Morocco from here. But I think he planned everything for a while before he left as I did not realize some things were missing until after he was gone. He also crashed my computer and I had to get a new hard drive x2, losing a lot of documents and messages and any other information that was on there. I also found all my yahoo messages with him since 2008 had all been deleted,(as I had my computer automatically sign me in). I did not find this out until after he was gone, when I went to look at some conversations we had had. Hind sight is 20/20. I realize there were other "Red Flags" I should have seen, like him wanting to use a different yahoo id than the one with all his friends and family on it. Also the "myspace profile" that I met him on disappeared one day and he told me that someone had hacked his account. Well I saved some cards/pictures that he had sent me, so I am able to click on the profile still and it takes me back to the original profile and it states there now, that amiryou only allows friends to access his information, (after he was hacked it said a 45 yr old male from NWT). Amir is a name that he went by and You is the first part of his name. He also had 2 facebook accounts, one he deleted with all my family and friends on it , did not know until after he left. Never thought to look. There is a few other things also, but I think I have said enough.

I do not want to discourage others with their relationships, but if things do not seem right to you please, please question everything. I was used to gain access to this country and am going to pay dearly for it.Also have faith in the Immigration Process and why it takes so long to get your loved ones here. I'm sure Immigration officer's know a lot more things than we do,so try to trust the process.It could save you a lot of grief and money in the long run. Do some checking if something does not seem right, because one thing I have learned is "The best offense is to go defense",meaning if your spouse starts getting defensive when questioned about something, be very cautious, something may not be right or true! My husband was very good a manipulating things and had an answer for everything. I have reported him to Canadian Border Services for Immigration Fraud, for Marriage of Convenience, but I don't see much happening with that. He is a disabled man in a wheelchair, everyone will feel sorry for him and on compassionate grounds they will let him stay as his life will be less if he returns to Morocco. Well my life and my children's lives will be less if he stays here and I have to pay for him to live. I can not afford to pay all that money, I don't know what I will do or what I can do. I feel my Government has failed me! All they say is" You signed the Sponsorship Agreement, you can not get out of it"! Like they care, they don't have the debt or was the one taken for a ride. I am the one who has been betrayed and I am being punished for it. From what I understand after talking with someone at the recovery office is the only way to get out of it, is if you were dead! Go figure! I have read about some people that have taken that route. So sad.

I want everyone to know that this is all the things I got or did for my husband since he has been here. (April 2010 - May 2011)

He refused to eat any meat unless it was killed the Islam way. We found a place in town that serve the Muslim Community in my city so I would purchase his meat there.
I took him to the local Islamic Center ,so he could meet people and go to Majed.
We went to the Immigration Services and were referred to a place called Employment for People with Disabilities, then were referred to another place that would help with funding to get him educated and go to college to do a computer course where he would get a diploma, so he cold get a job. He was injured when he was 17 so never finished school. He is doing ESL schooling at the college to be able to take courses need for this Diploma Computer Program. All funded through this Assistance program, compliments of our Canadian Government I might add.
From there I had purchase a brand new almost $6000.00 custom made wheelchair for him through my benefits at work, as his one from Morocco was very old and worn and weighed 50lbs and we were told by a worker at Employment for People with Disabilities he would need a new one in order to get a job.
I also got him hooked up with my dentist and had all his teeth fixed,including a broken front tooth, ( that is whole again) and his teeth cleaned. Thanks to my work benefits.
Next I purchase him a used motorized scooter (worth $3000.00 - $4000.00) got it for $1000.00, which took me all most a year to pay off as the guy was good enough to put it on payment plan for me.
I next got him an appointment with a Neurologist in town to have him assessed. Then a referral and appointment to see a Rehabilitation Dr.
Also got him into see a Plastic Surgeon due to a pressure sore he developed while in Morocco before coming to Canada.
A few perks of knowing Dr's as I work in the Healthcare field.
I also got him set up with the Handi-Dart bus system for people with Disabilities to be able to get him to and from the college and $80.00 worth of taxi-saver coupons to take a taxi to the bus stop when Handi-Dart could not pick him up, where he took the City bus to the college. This was also set up for when I had to have surgey and was not able to lift his chair in and out of the truck for a few months. I also purchase a Handi-Cap parking sign for when I was out with him shopping etc. ( He took this sign and coupons also when he left, I did not know)
My husband also ended up in the hospital after he left and I was there to make sure he was ok. One day while I was there he was kind of laughing to himself, (I am sure he thought it was funny that after everything he has done to me I still care about what happened to him)I asked him what was so funny, he said" nothing".
I also purchased clothing for him, winter wear, coat ,boots, hat, gloves, shirts, pants, socks, etc, as he did not bring a lot with him. He told me he gave away a lot of his clothes before coming here.???

I decided after reading some of the postings I need to let people know what was happening with me and everything I have been going through. He contacted me Dec 2/11 to ask me if I would agree to a divorce. I told him of course I would, he asked if I could pay for half. I told him he could pay for it as I will pay enough money as it is. I have not heard from him since.
If anyone has any questions please don't hesitate to ask. Good Luck to all who are waiting for their loved one and I wish you all great happiness.

 

[locolynn]

Amira00 what a sad story. I am really sorry all this happened to you. I hope you are able to find a way to happiness through all this misery.

Good luck and peace to you.

Lynn

 

[trini777]

My heart goes out to you. I can't beleive he went out of his way to make things harder for your you and your family. Please people apply caution when sponsoring, you can not always forsee things like this happening, but take hints seriously! This is where the conditional visa would have helped, but as we all know come MOCs dont get flagged.

 

[dair2dv8103100]

How do you attach am image on here? I click on the tab and it brings up two img quotes but I have no idea how to get the photo in there??

 

[ddobro2]

If the image is online, right-click on it and select "Properties." Copy the name of the image ending with something like .jpg or similar image file - should be in the "address" section of "Properties." Put that between 'img' and '/img' (with the brackets) in your post.

How do you attach am image on here? I click on the tab and it brings up two img quotes but I have no idea how to get the photo in there??