Luckyman said:
Well... Consider this...
If you got in a bad accident and you were together but hospitalized... Would he stay with you then? Would the expenses be too much? Would visits to the hospital end? What if it took years for a recovery... Or worse yet, you didn't fully recover?
I agree the system is very unfair... But blaming it is not an excuse... Not for you, but for the side that is willing to end it. There are many stresses and hurdles in life... And many of them within a marriage. There is a reason it is "till death do you part".
Trust me... Your better off.
I'm sorry...I really am, but time will show this for you.
Take care
Well, I've been going to just let it be and not say anything but Luckyman you speak as someone who has been waiting a grand total of 4 months, and I assume things are going very well. Both you and your wife are young and I don't doubt your wives visa will be in her hand by April.
It's easy to be all smiles and sunshine when things go smooth. It's not so easy when you feel your files have been neglected or are sitting at the bottom of a pile somewhere with nothing happening though. Some files are very straight forward, ... young woman never married before, no kids, hardly ever lived more than one or two places, .... then there are files like ours.
My wife has a son who's 19 and going to college, she's a widow, and has had several jobs and lived lots of places being now 53 years old. We've been waiting for their visa for 15 months now, and still have no idea when we'll see it, .... certainly not in time for Christmas as we had figured on though.
On the other hand a 52 year old acquaintance from work also went to the Philippines and married his 26 year old gf that he knew for a grand total of about 3 months in late November last year and they filed their documents in early march this year. She landed in Canada 3 weeks ago, so his entire wait was about 8 months start to finish.
It says on the CAS they started processing ours in mid Sept. this year, so they didn't even start processing ours till a year after we sent them in?
There are a lot of things that can cause stresses that lead to a melt down, and the financial burdens of a long wait weighs heavily on a lot of couples. Thank God that I hit an age where I could start drawing my CPP early or I'd surely be in a state of bankruptcy right now and all we'd worked for in this relationship would be lost. As it is we're just hanging on, and it's all because they cant seem to get things done in a timely manner for all who apply.
Only those who have been through this long wait and all the stresses involved can truly understand the devastation (emotionally, financially and physically) that happens to couples as months and sometimes years ad up.
My wife has really liked what you posted on here Luckyman and it is all well thought out but I remind her and you too that unless you've walked a mile in someone else's shoes it's hard to see or feel what they've been through.