Serious situation

[anxious2015]

Ask yourself this: would you want him to be the father of your child? You may get pregnant again and if you don't want him as a father I say get rid of him now. I understand you are still considering his feelings, but he didn't consider yours when he decided to treat you so poorly. If you fear that he may cause any harm, you should seek help from a women's shelter before doing anything. It is better to be aline than to be with someone who had no consideration for you. I am sorry you have to go through this. It is not something anyone deserves. You deserve happiness and love, always.

 

[Ponga]

I don't know what to say as it a crucial decision for you. You should discuss the matter very seriously and see what he thinks going forward. Give yourself 2/3 months gestation period to analyse everything more intensively and then decide whether you will continue with him. Mental peace of mind is everything in the long run. All the best.

LOL! You might want to look up the definition of Gestation.

 

[sashali78]

LOL! You might want to look up the definition of Gestation.

In some languages (Russian for example) "gestation period" or "giving a birth" can be used as an idiom to describe a difficult decision process. Perhaps that is also the case in OP native language...

 

[kisaki]

I have no advice and nothing to add except to say that I'm so, so sorry this happened to you. Sending you a big virtual hug.

 

[Ponga]

Perhaps, but in this case it was probably not the best choice of words, IMO, considering that the OP has already lost a child.

 

[WeeHippieElf]

check your inbox, lovely lady - there is a PM waiting for you

 

[fruitball4u]

If I withdraw the paper work will CIC tell him it was because of my withdrawl as to why he would be ask to leave the country?

Yes, as others have stated, he will be notified that his application was withdrawn.

But....please think about this:

Do you really want the reason that you stay with a lying, cheating, emotionally abuse man to be because you were too afraid of him knowing that you decided not to sponsor him anymore? He had zero guilt when he cheated on you with two other women. He had no guilt when he blamed you for his indiscretions. He had no guilt when he was rude, unkind, and derogatory toward you.

Now is not the time for you to feel sorry for him.

I am being harsh, but I am truly saying this out of concern for you: you need to re-grow your backbone and GET OUT. You are lucky in the fact that you haven't already gotten saddled down to this man via immigration or a baby. It will be hard. You will cry, you'll hurt, you'll argue with yourself as to whether or not you've made the right choice.

But from an outsiders perspective, we are all rooting for you, girl. There are so many other people in this world that can treat you well. Don't stay with someone like this out of fear of being alone, wanting a child, pity for something he brought on himself, etc.

We're here for you, if you need any help. If you want to chat, send me a message. <3

 

[Hasan9999]

LOL! You might want to look up the definition of Gestation.

It can also mean:
.....the conception and development of an idea or plan
Type of:
construction, mental synthesis
the creation of a construct; the process of combining ideas into a congruous object of thought

 

[JHWife2011]

I've contacted my lawyer and advised him of my wanting to withdraw from being a sponsor on the application.

 

[surleplateau]

I've contacted my lawyer and advised him of my wanting to withdraw from being a sponsor on the application.

I wish you the best of luck for your future, JHWife2011.

Please remember: he is wrong for cheating on you. He is wrong for blaming you for his lack of fidelity. He doesn't want to accept responsibility for his actions because he wants to make you feel bad. I suspect he wants to make you feel bad because he wants you to stay under his control.

He may try to cause more trouble for you, but don't let this awful person talk his way back into your life. Kick him out! He doesn't deserve any more chances from you. You deserve better than him.

 

[WeeHippieElf]

best of luck to you, my friend.. onwards and upwards!

 

[shortyp2000]

Im so sorry this happened to you, and you dont need that BS. He is not going to magically change and be your knight in shining armour anymore. You should get out. He's using you. If you notice, 100% of these posts say so. Because we arent attached with feelings to this man so it makes it easier for us to see he has done you so wrong and it will only get worse if you let it happen.
Good luck to you.

 

[eski]

I will be brutally honest here! !!
I WISH I COULD HOLD HIM DOWN AND GIVE HIM A GOOD BEATING.I'M SO ANGRY.
You see its men like this who destroy our society. They have no respect for women whatsoever. Makes you wonder if he ever had a mother.
Im a doctor and I've met several women going through stuff like this. It's obvious he is using you like so many others out there.
I'm a Christian and I don't believe in divorce so i wont go against my beliefs but i would say this. Stop that sponsorship process immediately!!!
I'm a big believer in second chances. I've seen marriages that had no hope get back on track. But you need to let him see that he can't use you anymore. I'm sorry you are going through this. God will give you a good man. You seem like a really nice lady thinking abt the effects of your actions on him. God bless you!!!

 

[Jasse]

once a cheater always a cheater, this is a blessing for you. Doesn't feel like it now but trust me leaving him is the only decision. Same thing happened for me, I was sponsoring my ex, after four months of being married and lots of arguing, I found out he was cheating on me. I tried to make it work but couldn't get past him sleeping with someone else. All trust was gone. I withdrew his application and reported him to CIC, no idea if he ever got deported nor do I care. I was happily married 3 years later