Just only my lonely Friday night thoughts
4 years ago I happened to be in the same situation, married to a charming girl, sponsored to Canada, she arrived, looked around and left in six weeks to visit her sick mother in Europe. Later just told me that she did not see any future with me, wanted to live with her mother and friends and a man she loved in Italy….I was graduating student, with a very small salary, rented basement from friends, and did not have even a car… Of course the years were terrible after, I had very strong depression, almost quit my school, started drinking heavily, smoking…hating women blaming everyone around. It was a miracle that I did not lose my job, otherwise likely would end in a shelter...
But, time passed, a friend brought me to the local gym, I started slowly recovering, see people, talk to other girls, meet them outside, date..
In 4 years, I got my salary tripled, graduated my school, moved to the nice apartment, paid off all debts. And I met online again a girl, from my home country, who become my Loved One and we married and I sponsor her and her child to Canada, just finished the paper work, will send the envelop tomorrow.
I know that the risk that the current spouse may leave me again is High, women like money, please do not blame me in sexism but most of the relationship started because of money and ended because of money. That is the nature of two souls joining there is always one who have needs for food, or future for herself or child. I do not judge those poor girls who do everything possible just to escape from the third world poverty. We should blame our governments who do not support democracy and capitalism in those countries, rather supporting dictators and communist governments. Look at Mexico for example, USA could easily change government there and create conditions for Mexicans to live with dignity, instead of having a headache with illegal immigrants.
And I want to blame ourselves, sponsors… Before signing those papers we should think twice before taking so much responsibility of sponsorship, as we do not know that person enough and may be we are not qualified for relationship, for family. Look at those guys of 50 ties sponsoring 20 years old girls models of different ethnic, background, language and culture… of course they would become alone in 5 years as these girls as I said would play any sex games just to get to Canada, but soon after PR is given they would leave asap, taking money and breaking hearts.
That woman from Ontario, waitress she should have known that international marriages are successful only if there is a strong financial support, when you have money, life does not seem to be difficult and you can make gifts, and travel and make someone happy, but when you do not have money or you lose your job, all the dark side of your soul comes. That woman she married a man of different culture, nationality, language and habits because she was lonely, she was in need for love, for someone who would treat her as a girl. Unfortunately she does not understand that foreign man from the third world country expects totally different look, personality and behavior of his ideal girl. Canadian women, please forgive me, You are not the right fit for those males, way too much of cultural difference. So when YOU sponsor Nigerian or Cuban males, please look at the mirror first, you are not a Hollywood stars, if you weren’t able to attract local Canadian guys, you have no chances to find yours abroad. And when you think you found one, you must be a fitness trainer with a culinary degree and driving BMW. The same can be referred to guys – sponsors…be ready to spent lots of money.
As about myself, I’d rather take a risk and sponsor my spouse, just do not want to spend weekends in my office escaping from loneliness…
4 years ago I happened to be in the same situation, married to a charming girl, sponsored to Canada, she arrived, looked around and left in six weeks to visit her sick mother in Europe. Later just told me that she did not see any future with me, wanted to live with her mother and friends and a man she loved in Italy….I was graduating student, with a very small salary, rented basement from friends, and did not have even a car… Of course the years were terrible after, I had very strong depression, almost quit my school, started drinking heavily, smoking…hating women blaming everyone around. It was a miracle that I did not lose my job, otherwise likely would end in a shelter...
But, time passed, a friend brought me to the local gym, I started slowly recovering, see people, talk to other girls, meet them outside, date..
In 4 years, I got my salary tripled, graduated my school, moved to the nice apartment, paid off all debts. And I met online again a girl, from my home country, who become my Loved One and we married and I sponsor her and her child to Canada, just finished the paper work, will send the envelop tomorrow.
I know that the risk that the current spouse may leave me again is High, women like money, please do not blame me in sexism but most of the relationship started because of money and ended because of money. That is the nature of two souls joining there is always one who have needs for food, or future for herself or child. I do not judge those poor girls who do everything possible just to escape from the third world poverty. We should blame our governments who do not support democracy and capitalism in those countries, rather supporting dictators and communist governments. Look at Mexico for example, USA could easily change government there and create conditions for Mexicans to live with dignity, instead of having a headache with illegal immigrants.
And I want to blame ourselves, sponsors… Before signing those papers we should think twice before taking so much responsibility of sponsorship, as we do not know that person enough and may be we are not qualified for relationship, for family. Look at those guys of 50 ties sponsoring 20 years old girls models of different ethnic, background, language and culture… of course they would become alone in 5 years as these girls as I said would play any sex games just to get to Canada, but soon after PR is given they would leave asap, taking money and breaking hearts.
That woman from Ontario, waitress she should have known that international marriages are successful only if there is a strong financial support, when you have money, life does not seem to be difficult and you can make gifts, and travel and make someone happy, but when you do not have money or you lose your job, all the dark side of your soul comes. That woman she married a man of different culture, nationality, language and habits because she was lonely, she was in need for love, for someone who would treat her as a girl. Unfortunately she does not understand that foreign man from the third world country expects totally different look, personality and behavior of his ideal girl. Canadian women, please forgive me, You are not the right fit for those males, way too much of cultural difference. So when YOU sponsor Nigerian or Cuban males, please look at the mirror first, you are not a Hollywood stars, if you weren’t able to attract local Canadian guys, you have no chances to find yours abroad. And when you think you found one, you must be a fitness trainer with a culinary degree and driving BMW. The same can be referred to guys – sponsors…be ready to spent lots of money.
As about myself, I’d rather take a risk and sponsor my spouse, just do not want to spend weekends in my office escaping from loneliness…
