Love or Opportunity? Coffee Social

[tuyen]

I don't think deliberately lying to "bad cases" is a good idea.
Just tell them their cases are going to be red flags.

Telling them everything is going to be OK is just going to add to the waiting times of legit couples.

I tried that in the past. They didn't believe me. In fact, the more you tell them "NO", the more determined they are to plow forward anyway, and THAT is what truly clogs up the queue and adds to wait times of legit couples - when you have morons being processed and fighting the system when they have absolutely no business even trying.

Also, although this started out socially and nice, it is quickly turning into a viscous viper pit and i think all of you are better than that.

I assure you, that's simply not the case.

 

[tuyen]

Congratulation for your wifes arrival and your soon to be born baby girl!!!

I second that.

Now you can live a tension free life. 8)

A soon-to-be-crying-all-night baby, and you're thinking his life is just about to become tension-free? Oh my god...your innocence is adorable!

 

[tuyen]

I agree. Plus you don't the whole situation exactly. Only the poster does. He sounds repentent (sp?) about his past.

I read his post several times, and I find not even one tiny little indication anywhere to suggest that he's the least bit repentant. All he did was list his various accomplishments, but I didn't see so much as a hint of remorse.

 

[blueboom]

Well folks, seems you're all enjoying some nice chit chat, so I'll just add a bit of chit chat myself. Nuthin' too important, except....

...... MY WIFE LANDED TODAY!!!! Beyond thrilled to have that taken care of before the arrival of our first child, my wife's due 3 weeks from today, on Christmas Day in fact...not that we expect our wee girl to necessarily make her arrival that day, but you know what I mean... Anyway, it's official, my beautiful bride is now a Permanent Resident of Canada!

I'm so happy for you! This chapter is finally coming to an end for you and you're onto the next! It would be so cool if she were born on Dec 25, but for her sake let's hope she misses by a few days so people don't get lazy with presents! ;D

 

[amikety]

Well folks, seems you're all enjoying some nice chit chat, so I'll just add a bit of chit chat myself. Nuthin' too important, except....

...... MY WIFE LANDED TODAY!!!! Beyond thrilled to have that taken care of before the arrival of our first child, my wife's due 3 weeks from today, on Christmas Day in fact...not that we expect our wee girl to necessarily make her arrival that day, but you know what I mean... Anyway, it's official, my beautiful bride is now a Permanent Resident of Canada!

Congrats!!!! Can we demand pictures?

 

[scylla]

Amikety is the self-professed Grammar Nazi. I'm merely a crusher of dreams.

Yes - I know. I'm behind.

I don't think you're so much of a crusher of dreams as brutally honest (perhaps a bit too brutal at times). Sometimes there isn't enough of that around here. People need to hear the truth so they can deal with it and understand what they can really expect from the immigration process. Being lulled into a false sense of security can be dangerous and doesn't really help anyone (although maybe it temporarily spares "feelings"). Example: There was a refusal here a few weeks ago that had enough red flags to hold a ticker-tape parade. The first few responses were all "I can't believe you were refused!". Person was like "I know! I have no red flags!". Then a few of us responded more frankly. We need this kind honestly around here - even if it's sometimes bad news.

Having said that, if we are assigning ourselves titles, I call dibs on Village Idiot.

 

[tuyen]

Scylla is 110% right here. I've flagged several threads (selling **spam**s) and gotten a thank you from the mods. They are real and do remove posts.

Yeah...and sometimes they even remove the ones that really don't warrant it. It pisses me off when I take time and effort to write something (sometimes at length), only to have it wiped out because some over-zealous "moderator" is too lazy to remove the one or two specific posts that SHOULD be removed, and instead decides to wipe the whole conversation from start to finish.

And if that isn't enough, I get banned for making a VERY innocuous comment, directed at someone who high-fived another guy who insulted me. So I made mention of his truly spectacular English skills, and what was the result?

The guy who insulted me: no consequences.
The guy who cheered him on: no consequences.
Me: get banned for three days .

If that's the caliber of "moderators" that are working on this forum, why even bother having them?

 

[blueboom]

People need to hear the truth so they can deal with it and understand what they can really expect from the immigration process. Being lulled into a false sense of security can be dangerous and doesn't really help anyone (although maybe it temporarily spares "feelings").

I totally agree. On a slightly related note, I've spent a majority of my teenaged and adult life on Internet forums and this has got to be one of the nicer ones. I can understand why people would get defensive when someone says "well, no, you misrepresented facts" because the whole process seems invasive, but with something as important as being reunited with your family, do you want someone to spare your feelings or tell you what you should realistically expect? Yeah, some posters package it bluntly or rudely, but once again.... It's the Internet, bro.

 

[blueboom]

On a completely different water cooler note, today was one of those days I kept saying "I can't believe they pay me to do this! 8)"

 

[tuyen]

Yes - I know. I'm behind.

I don't think you're so much of a crusher of dreams as brutally honest (perhaps a bit too brutal at times). Sometimes there isn't enough of that around here. People need to hear the truth so they can deal with it and understand what they can really expect from the immigration process. Being lulled into a false sense of security can be dangerous and doesn't really help anyone (although maybe it temporarily spares "feelings").

Yes...thank you! Someone who actually gets it!

That's exactly my outlook too: when someone comes here asking for advice or wants to know their "chances of approval", why should we sugar coat it for them? Are you doing that person a favour by telling them something that is less than honest? I think it's actually a lot meaner to placate them and have them think everything will be okay, when in reality, no, you're so far from "okay" that you might as well just eliminate that word from your vocabulary altogether. If I was in a situation needing to know my chances of approval, I'd want people to me totally honest with me so I can prepare myself for the most likely outcome. What good would it do me if everyone tells me, "oh I'm sure you won't have problems", and then it turns out that I would've had a better chance of finding liquid gold flowing out of my kitchen faucet?

Example: There was a refusal here a few weeks ago that had enough red flags to hold a ticker-tape parade. The first few responses were all "I can't believe you were refused!". Person was like "I know! I have no red flags!". Then a few of us responded more frankly. We need this kind honestly around here - even if it's sometimes bad news.

Dammit...I missed it...

Having said that, if we are assigning ourselves titles, I call dibs on Village Idiot.

Hah!
In school, I used to be Class Clown.

 

[Shiny88]

I second that.

A soon-to-be-crying-all-night baby, and you're thinking his life is just about to become tension-free? Oh my god...your innocence is adorable!

lmaooo tension free about immigration ,my bad i didnt mention that wont be the same with a baby!same trouble for me in exactly 7weeks lol ;D

 

[lunas]

grrrrrr today is one of those days...major WTF!!!!

 

[tuyen]

grrrrrr today is one of those days...major WTF!!!!

WTF happened?

 

[amikety]

Yes - I know. I'm behind.

I don't think you're so much of a crusher of dreams as brutally honest (perhaps a bit too brutal at times). Sometimes there isn't enough of that around here. People need to hear the truth so they can deal with it and understand what they can really expect from the immigration process. Being lulled into a false sense of security can be dangerous and doesn't really help anyone (although maybe it temporarily spares "feelings"). Example: There was a refusal here a few weeks ago that had enough red flags to hold a ticker-tape parade. The first few responses were all "I can't believe you were refused!". Person was like "I know! I have no red flags!". Then a few of us responded more frankly. We need this kind honestly around here - even if it's sometimes bad news.

Having said that, if we are assigning ourselves titles, I call dibs on Village Idiot.

No scylla, no way you're village idiot. You're the pro poster I most admired and look up to. Definitely NOT the village idiot.

 

[lunas]

WTF happened?

Ahem, WTF=What the freak fyi

I let my husband add my email to his smartphone so the phone also synchronized my contacts and duhh I have male and female names there, so he thinks I'm hiding things from him because he sees I have "guys" in my contacts...so I'm like WTF and review the contacts on my phone and of course, they are generic names I accumulated over the years, main contacts from public offices, my Dr, my dentist, blah blah. I don't even talk to any online friends I used to have. So I'm trying to think how I can explain that to him, so I'm waiting for my head to cool down 'cos I could fry an egg on my forehead right now.