lunas said:
Enjoy your shower!
Are your hubbies good at giving gifts? Mine is terrible :-X He didn't receive gifts when he was a child so he doesn't understand the concept. He told me he always looks for things for me but he is scared I won't like them. I have told him so many times I will love it just because it comes from him. He still doesn't get it. I'm starting to think that I just need to get used to the idea he shows his love other ways, but I loooooooooove giving gifts, it's the way how I show anybody my love (family, friends, my hubby).
So what are your thoughts? Am I crazy? :-X
Several weeks ago, my hubby called me and said "Ooohhh I have a surprise for you!! You know I'm not good with surprises so I'm going to tell you"
My face. :-X
Him "Sooo I bought a wooden carving of two fish...."
My face. :-X
Him "You know how I love supporting everyone who tries..."
In my head "Goo on....what's the surprise?"
Him "Soooo I bought the two wooden fish!!"
Me "Wow!! That's awesome baby......especially for supporting the vendor!"
Thinking that was it I said to myself "He really needs a lesson on what the true meaning of a surprise is to a woman"
Him "Babes...I'm not done!!"
In my head after getting all excited and feeling deflated by his version of a surprise "You mean there's more?"
Him "I had him carve my name on one fish and yours on the other!! I thought that it would be great to hang the two fish at my bar!!" in his most proud voice.
Me "OMG that is so thoughtful of you!"
Well it wasn't a shopping spree, or gift box to open but it was his way of giving to me....in a sense.
My point here is he didn't grow up in an environment where gift giving was the conventional and he's certainly gotten better at surprising me but I've learned to appreciate his way of "giving" to me. He takes care of me and makes me feel like the most appreciated woman on this planet earth and I've slowly learned to not measure his love by the material gifts I've been so accustomed to with men before him. To be honest, I've learned to humble myself in many ways as I used to be quite pretentious when it came to how much a man spends on me and as much as gifts were literally dropped at my door, the satisfaction was only gift-deep.
THAT SAID, the distance between us makes it difficult to give gifts due to cost of shipping which I think is a complete waste of money!! However he sends money on occasion so that I can do the little pleasurable female things such as getting my hair done, a pair of shoes here and there which I think is so utterly thoughtful. When we're together, he pays for most things which totally satisfies me.......for now. But as Nevaeha said, most men cannot read a woman's mind and it is up to us to guide them into understanding our needs and if that includes gift giving, he needs to know this. Do what makes it comfortable and happy for you as you deserve that much. But realize that he likely expresses his love for you in many other ways that I bet so many women would die for their men to do!
My two cents.
