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Friend sponsoring New Wife

CMLR

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Jun 19, 2014
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OK, so for our friend if he is not willing to live in Cuba with her what does he do? I think he will have a a huge issue getting them to approve his sponsorship due to the age difference if nothing more. There is also an issue he is often telling us her 5 year old is sick again and I now of a couple of times she was in the hospital. The new wife is a Dr in Cuba but had to give up practicing before they married or she would not have been allowed to leave the country, from what he was told by her and her family.
 

Amalthea

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Yikes, CMLR. Your consultant gave you some terrible and wrong advice.

US Outland apps are being processed even as quickly as 5-6 months, most being 8-10 months. That's way less than 30.

Although there's not much you can do now, I would be really hesitant about the things this consultant tells you from now on. US Outland applications are processed in Ottawa, NOT NY or LA.

As for your friend, I think their application is going to raise some huge flags. No one here works for CIC, and it depends on the person looking at the file, but they definitely have an uphill battle. They need to convince a complete stranger that she isn't using him to move to Canada. A 50 year(!!!) age gap, and considernig he's unwilling to live there, makes that really tough. I would have a heart to heart to your friend and try to illustrate that she may be pretending to love him and will leave him when she gets PR.
 
M

mikeymyke

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CMLR said:
OK, so for our friend if he is not willing to live in Cuba with her what does he do? I think he will have a a huge issue getting them to approve his sponsorship due to the age difference if nothing more. There is also an issue he is often telling us her 5 year old is sick again and I now of a couple of times she was in the hospital. The new wife is a Dr in Cuba but had to give up practicing before they married or she would not have been allowed to leave the country, from what he was told by her and her family.
If he's not willing to live in Cuba, then what's he supposed to do if and when she is refused PR? Divorce her and find another? Move to a different country? Live in Cuba? Just ask him that directly. When people marry for love and not status, it's much less stressful because both of you won't worry whether you be approved or not as long as you have each other and will live anywhere. Nothing in life is a sure thing, and nothing is a sure thing when it comes to sponsoring a spouse, there's always a chance you will be refused, some countries more so than others. He has to weigh whether he loves his wife more or his country more.
 

CMLR

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Jun 19, 2014
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Believe me he has been told more than once, even just by me, that she says she loves him but that she is probably using him. I have told him I am sorry for what I think but I still tell him my thoughts. I mean come one I am in my 50's and if I had met him before meeting my husband I still would not have looked a second time if for no other reason the age gap we have, he is about 25 years older than I am. I even told him once that even if she was not using him that he was being selfish to wanting to marry someone so much younger. I told him that even to just want to "date" her was selfish in my opinion. Why, because there is no way other than if she got in an accident that killed her, he would not be leaving her a fairly young widow even if he lives another 15 years to be well over 90. He did not like my saying that and I am sure I offended him but I have a friend who was married to someone close to their age but still she was left a widow at the age of 37 with 2 young kids it was not easy and she had her family and his all close by as well as life long friends.
 

CMLR

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Jun 19, 2014
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Actually our friend may now be a Canadian Citizen but only a PR or he may be once by now but he was not one by birth. I do not know how committed he is to his Country. I agree you never know what might happen. There should be no way that my husband is not allowed to be my sponsor but it could happen. We talk often about what would we do then. More than likely we would just move to the US as that was our original plan anyway. We changed plans for various reasons and are willing to rethink things if needed. I am from the west coast but have a son who lives in the mid west of the US and he has often told us he would love us to come move closer to him. We live in BC now as do his 2 kids and my other 3 live in Washington State. But time will tell what is right for us. I am glad to be living with him, the first 8 months we were married I lived in Washington and he in BC we only got to see each other a couple times in that time even though the distance was not too great. I can't imagine how it is for people who live further apart. It must be awful waiting and wondering.
 

Rob_TO

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CMLR said:
We know we have a 10 month approval for stage one however after that I can get a work permit and I can apply for insurance. We have a very good immigration specialist who also helped me get a 1 year visitor extension so I do not have to leave. We did not want to have to maybe wait the 30 months since we are both in our 50's and I want to be working again as soon as possible.
Have to agree with what the other posters have said here. All US citizens are processed in CPC-Ottawa for outland applications, which is explained in the guide under which visa office to select for processing, and links to this page: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/information/offices/apply-where.asp

If your consultant told you that US outland apps take 30 months, then your consultant is a complete idiot and I would run away from them as fast as I could.

US apps through CPC-Ottawa for straightforward cases are taking around 8-10 months TOTAL to complete and get full PR. Its around 2 months for stage 1, then another 6-8 months or so for stage 2. Incredibly faster than inland apps.
 

gamyover

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It's not my intention to offend anyone from Cuba, but most of them marrying foreigners is just to get out of there, that has happened with Mexican man and women married Cubans to.

I would say your friend not even tried they'll be rejected because I don't think nobody in the world would believe someone on their 30's would fall kn love with someone 50 years older. And how you fall in love with someone you don't understand?

My husband is 18 years older and at first I was shocked I couldn't believe I was falling in love with him. Even at first I didn't want to meet him. I love my husband a lot. Another thing you're right I prayed so he can live till he is 80 or older so we can be together many years but even you never know with life the chance of me being a widow is high, heartbreaking.

Your friend is going to lose more time and money trying to bringing her here than just making a plan of maybe live there for some months and if he miss Canada come back here, or just move there with her. If my husband be retired by now probably he would have moved to Mexico instead. I don't want to be mean but your friend's time is gold for him.
 

keesio

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CMLR said:
OK, so for our friend if he is not willing to live in Cuba with her what does he do? I think he will have a a huge issue getting them to approve his sponsorship due to the age difference if nothing more.
So many red flags here. The age gap is not just big... it is HUGE. That is a major red flag. Then she is from Cuba - which has been identified by CIC as a country with a lot of reported immigration fraud. Another flag. Then they have communication barrier, another red flag. His family and friends never met his wife... another big red flag.

I don't see how this case is approved.
 

CMLR

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Jun 19, 2014
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I totally agree that IF our friend is able to get his new wife living here it will be a miracle. So many of us that know him tried to talk him out of it. In fact I know both my husband and I were shocked when our friend first told us he was engaged because at that same time he also told us that he told her he would help her and her family, there is a sister and her family as well as parents who live together, out by giving them 200 dollars a month. He told us that she told him that was not enough to help all of them, he was really only thinking of helping her and her daughter t that point. so 200 was huge. My husband and I were just getting married ourselves at that point and told him that this was a red flag to us. Our friend feels so bad for Cubans and this family for sure. His new wife who has given up her Doctoring position in order to marry him, was earning what he called the equivalent of 18 dollars a month and her father a barber gets only .25 a hair cut. I explained to him that although that was low I have done research and it si not bad for Cuban wages. His giving them 200 a month is like her getting nearly a years wages every month! I so wish he had not married her. There were a lot of obstetricals in the way along the way. Enough that I as a Christian, which he is one too, felt that mayvbe God was trying to tell him to stop. But he would not listen to that and now I am afraid he will be a miserable old man wanting her here and her not being able to be here. Him not wanting to be there. HE said he asked her so many times if she really wanted to marry him since he is so much older. He always told her to look at his face see how old he is. She always told him she didn't care that she doesn't want to marry another young Cuban man as they all only drink too much and don't want to work. He says he told her over and over how he is not rich. Once he told her that it takes him 20,000 a month just to pay all his bills, he owns his own company which has huge bills plus his house is not paid off and he has a rental house. I told him not to try to explain it that way as to her 20,000 is not imaginable. HE says in a 35 year career she would have earned only 6,000. I told him to instead tell her tht her 200 or so a year would last him how many hours in a month. But I don't think he did this. So YES I believe she si using him in so many ways but he would not see it so now he will try to find a way to get her to immigrate to Canada where I will be expected to be a good friend to her, for the sake of my husbands friendship with him. I can and will be her friend as I have friends of all ages but it is hard to think of watching her using him and to see them together as a couple will make me feel disgusted at first I am sure. I mean yuk, he is older than my father and she is my daughters age that just grosses me out. And I would not have dated anyone more than 10 years older than I was, my first husband was 9 years older and that was not always easy.
 

Kev1n

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If she ever gets here she might end up leaving him ....
 

scylla

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rhcohen2014 said:
at this point it doesn't matter what "should have" been done, as it can't be undone. What the concern is the information this consultant is providing. It doesn't seem to be very good. Its seems to be much more successful to use this forum to navigate the process and settlement.
Agreed. Filing inland as an American was a mistake - but what's done is done. What's frustrating about this is that this bad advice was provided by a paid consultant. I would be requesting a full refund. This is immigration 101 and this consultant clearly doesn't know what he/she is doing, doesn't understand the process, and doesn't understand processing times. Pretty sad that you can get far more accurate information here in a matter of minutes for free than from someone who does this as their job. Again, I would be demanding a full refund.
 

rhcohen2014

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scylla, also the inland applicant appears to have left canada. so it will be interesting to read how the application unfolds, and if there will be issues re-entering canada down the road. Truth be told though, i'm not so convinced the stories in this thread are legitimate since they don't really make much sense.
 

Dragoon

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Well what's done is done you can't undo. Your 70 year old friend trying to get that girl from Cuba has almost no chance. As everyone mentioned, huge obstacle is the age difference and the 2nd being the woman is from Cuba where there are a lot of fraud marriages. I personally do not see the application getting approved.
 

CMLR

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Jun 19, 2014
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Believe me the stories I have posted are not stories they are truth. I do not understand how they are confusing but ok if someone is confused they are nothing I can say to change it. I have gone out of the country once since we sent in our application. It is an inland application so that I can work sooner, according to what we were told. I have a one year extension on my visitor status and have been told that I can use it to get in and out of the country anytime I want. This was told to us by our consultant and it was told to me by a boarder patrol person as well when they placed it in my Passport the day I got the extension. our friend is nearly 50 years older than his new wife and I agree that it will be at the very least a huge struggle to get her here. I feel I need to be supportive in this, even though I did tell him that marrying her was not a good idea in my eyes or so many other peoples eyes that he knows, including his own children.
 
M

mikeymyke

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I thought as you get older, you're supposed to be wiser, your friend seems to be going the opposite.