IELTS - Writing - For Band 7 or Above.

[Rehanyousaf]

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job.
Write a letter to this friend.
In your letter:
say why he/she would not enjoy going to college
explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her
suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her
Write at least 150 words.


Hello Sohaeb,

I hope you are doing well. As you requested for my suggestions regarding taking a gap year, I’m writing this letter to provide you with some details about why you should take a year off before proceeding to tertiary education.

While having the last discussion with you just before your exam, I found out that you were quite burnt-out due to academic pressure. Thus, taking a break is a good idea to rejuvenate yourself with some recreational activities.

Also, although you’ve a solid foundation in accounts, I believe you’re more inclined towards the creative industry. In fact, If I’m not mistaken, you’d shown keen interest in digital marketing. So, why don’t you give it a try? Indeed, It’s imperative to figure out the right direction before making a huge investment in your higher education.

Finally, by looking at your interest, I can recommend you with certainty that you must join a creative agency, which handles digital marketing of other companies. Well, I’ve good news for you as well. Remember my friend Cansha; she’s working in Barz, the pioneer of digital marketing in Pakistan. She can assist you further if you’re intended to apply there.

Please feel free to disturb be anytime.

With love,

Rehan Yousaf

 

[marosa]

Thanks a lot. This is what Jay suggested. Talk about the other side in Bp1 and describe your opinion in Bp2. This way one won't run out of ideas as well. Because, if we fully agree or disagree, it becomes difficult to gather different points for both paragraphs.

It’s not quite talking about the other side, because you somewhat agree to that side, too. If you say you fully agree or disagree, then you shouldn’t talk about the other side at all.

 

[Sohaibkq]

The main reason for the high sale of consumer goods in today’s society is advertising. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today’s contemporary world, advertisement plays a crucial role in promoting a new product. There is an opinion that high sales of products are directly attributed to the graphical presentation. I, however, believe that the product’s pricing and other people’s experiences are more important factors for generating peak sales.

Nowadays, without competitive pricing, only the visual sight cannot guarantee maximum sales for a company. While I concede that advertisements make a product look striking, the problem is that it does not translate into sales unless the price and the feature's ratio is balanced. As a result, a company’s sales are directly affected and they are bound to lower their prices to sustain their share in the market. Taking an example of the smartphones, plenty of companies are now advertising similar features for their newly launched devices, still, the consumer’s buying decision is associated with the pricing.

Usually, visuals stay in people’s memories for a short span and this is where a hands-on experience becomes a crucial factor for the successful outcome of products. Many supporters of the advertisement claim that virtual appearance of goods is enough for them to make a purchase. However, I would argue that advertisement may mislead at times, and hence final features don not appear to be the way these are advertised. Taking an example of automobiles, a reliable on-ground experience advocates the true value of products and translates into generating massive sales for the manufacturing brand.

In short, without challenging pricing, a company cannot boost their sales in the long run. Moreover, a practical experience is usually a better decision-maker point for the consumer instead of relying on an advertisement. Therefore, alone print and electronic media display of products are not sufficient.

@cansha @marosa

 

[marosa]

@cansha @marosa


You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job.
Write a letter to this friend.
In your letter:
say why he/she would not enjoy going to college
explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her
suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

Dear Rehan,
I hope you are in good health and enjoying your time in Karachi. I am writing to advise you on why you should look for a job instead of joining college at this time. “With regards to our recent conversation on whether or not you should continue your studies” smth like this

New para, that’s important Since I am aware that you are passing through tough financial time times in this case, you will not be able to enjoy college as the majority of colleges are now charging hefty annual fees.

your next para is not connected to the previous one at all
There are enormous benefits of starting a job. Most importantly, it will assist you in meeting your overheads and you will not be dependent on anyone for your spending. Once you have a satisfactory amount of saving savings, you can rethink on the idea of joining the college.
As you are quite interested in computer graphics, I would suggest you to look for a job as an animation designer. Once you gain adequate expertise, you can apply for a job in multinational companies. Moreover, looking at your creative abilities, I would advise you to search for a job related to article writing moreover? “I suggest you to become a ux designer and moreover a content writer? How do you measure that the second opinion is greater or even comparable to the first one? You add moreover when you want to put more emphasis on an argument, don’t just use random linking words plz. The kind of superior skills you possess in writing will help you a lot in securing a decent job in a local newspaper office. Now these are just random advices you’re giving to your friend

I hope you the suggestions I have put forward will assist you in making your decision.

Yours sincerely,

Sohaib Qureshi

Hi!

1. Don’t use words learnt by heart just anywhere.
2. Pay more attention to paragraphing.
3. Don’t put all the ideas you have in the letter/essay. Pick the one

 

[marosa]

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job.
Write a letter to this friend.
In your letter:
say why he/she would not enjoy going to college
explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her
suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her
Write at least 150 words.


Hello Dear Sohaeb,

I hope you are doing well. As you requested for my suggestions regarding taking a gap year, I’m writing this letter to provide you with some details about why you should take a year off before proceeding to tertiary education.

While having the last discussion with you just before your exam, I found out that you were quite burnt-out due to the academic pressure. Thus, taking a break is a good idea to rejuvenate yourself with some recreational activities. Job is not a recreational activity, unfortunately ((

Also, although you’ve first of all, it’s “you have” in this case - “you’ve done your homework”, but “you have some books on your table“, secondly, I think you shouldn’t use contractions even in an informal letter in task 1. a solid foundation in accounts, I believe you’re more inclined towards the creative industry. In fact, If I’m not mistaken, you’d shown keen interest in digital marketing. So, why don’t you give it a try? Indeed, It’s imperative to figure out the right direction before making a huge investment in your higher education.

Finally, by looking at your interest, I can recommend you with certainty that you must join a creative agency, which handles digital marketing of other companies. Well “well” does not seem to connect your sentences properly in this case, maybe “in case you are interested in such an option...”, I’ve it’s either I have or I’ve got, but the latter is way too informal, so “I have” good news for you as well. Remember my friend Cansha; she’s working in Barz, the pioneer of digital marketing in Pakistan. She can assist you further if you’re intended If you have intentions to apply to apply there.

Now you’ve gone too far in breaking down sentences)) “My friend Cansha works at Barz, the pioneer of digital marketing in Pakistan, and she might be able to assist you, shall you decide to apply for a job there.” - this sentence is still a bit long, but its structure is ok for band 7 and it’s ok to have such sentences in one or two places. But if I were you, maybe I would drop the pioneer part.

Please feel free to disturb be anytime. do not hesitate to contact me maybe

With love, all the best maybe

Rehan Yousaf

Hi!

You’re ok with articles.)

My tutor would suggest me not to use contractions even in an informal letter, so I’m not sure about that part.

In any case, you misuse “I’ve” too often, google it.

 

[cansha]

@cansha @marosa

What should be the best way to attempt To what extent essays?

Jay's method:

Intro: Background statement. This essay will argue why (your opinion).

Body paragraph 1: Talk about the other side, why and how they have that opinion
Body paragraph 2: Talk about your side. He says in 2nd paragraph, you should go against the other side and present your opinion.

Shelly's method:

Introduction: Background statement. Your opinion (either agree or disagree).

Body paragraph 1 &2: Start with your opinion. Add a sentence to show distancing (Acknowledge other side but in the same sentence destroy it as well. For example, although I acknowledge this is the issue, but issue is not with everyone. something like that).

She says if you want to achieve 8.0 for Task achievement, you should do this way. This will not change your opinion, you are just touching other side.


Please advise.

I have no clue about the above two people. Honestly, I consciously decided not to read too many opinions on write the essay. There is no right or wrong approach. A good essay can be written following any approach but the most important point is whether you have a logical "story".

As far as "to what extent" and/or "discuss both sides and give your opinion" essays go - Both these can be written in different ways depending on how much content you have. One example in this post https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-38#post-7269377

My simple rule has been to use BP1 to explore the viewpoint / ideas I disagree with and use BP2 for the viewpoint I agree with. My reasoning is simple if you flip the order more often than not you will contradict yourself.

 

[cansha]

My tutor would suggest me not to use contractions even in an informal letter, so I’m not sure about that part.

Contractions are good for informal letters. I remember ieltsliz mentioning it shows that you understand the context of the letter. So no issues there.

 

[cansha]

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job.
Write a letter to this friend.
In your letter:
say why he/she would not enjoy going to college
explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her
suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her
Write at least 150 words.


Hello Sohaeb,

I hope you are doing well. As you requested for my suggestions regarding taking a gap year, I’m writing this letter to provide you with some details about why you should take a year off before proceeding to tertiary education.

While having the last discussion with you just before your exam, I found out that you were quite burnt-out due to academic pressure. Thus, taking a break is a good idea to rejuvenate yourself with some recreational activities.

Also, although you’ve a solid foundation in accounts, I believe you’re more inclined towards the creative industry. In fact, If I’m not mistaken, you’d shown keen interest in digital marketing. So, why don’t you give it a try? Indeed, It’s imperative to figure out the right direction before making a huge investment in your higher education.

Finally, by looking at your interest, I can recommend you with certainty that you must join a creative agency, which handles digital marketing of other companies. Well, I’ve good news for you as well. Remember my friend Cansha; she’s working in Barz, the pioneer of digital marketing in Pakistan. She can assist you further if you’re intended to apply there.

Please feel free to disturb be anytime.

With love,

Rehan Yousaf

Marosa has already given a very nice review. I would just add that I think your task response is not good simply because Cansha is a HE.

 

[Sohaibkq]

Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs in order to save money.
Write a letter to the local council. In your letter,
give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre
explain why the sports and leisure centre is important for the local community
describe the possible effects on local people if the centre closes

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to express my concerns on the possible closure of the local council’s recreational centre. Since the location of the centre is quite convenient, I along with my friends regularly visit it for playing tennis and cricket. The indoor gym and swimming pool have considerably benefited all of us as we use these on a daily basis.

The sports and leisure centre is playing a crucial role in keeping our local community physically active. As we don’t have any other public park in our area, the community centre is bridging people of our area together for meetups.

Unfortunately, if the local council insists on closing the area due to lack fo funds, it is going to create a major negative impact on people’s physical health. Moreover, due to the unavailability of another area with similar facilities, town residents will be bound to spend their leisure time at home. This is going to degrade their mental health.

I hope the elected authorities will reconsider their decision and will look for a better solution.

Yours faithfully,

Sohaib Qureshi

@cansha @marosa

 

[marosa]

The main reason for the high sale of consumer goods in today’s society is advertising. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today’s contemporary world, advertisement plays a crucial role in promoting a new product. - just like back in 50s, 60s, no? Why do you have to have that general sentence at the beginning? There is an opinion that high sales of products are directly attributed to the graphical presentation. 1. Word attributed is misused here, 2. Advertising is more than a product’s graphical presentation. While trying to replace every single word of the question you lost the meaning. As it’s been said many times, it’s ok to use some common words more than once; it’s ok not to “paraphrase“ just everything, because there’s no rule that paraphrasing means no word from the source sentence should be kept; it is ok to slightly modify words- advertising/to advertise/advertisements. And if you still want a synonym for that word, better use “promotion”, “marketing campaigns” etc. I, however, believe that the which particular product? product’s pricing and other people’s experiences are more important factors for generating peak sales.

Nowadays, without competitive pricing, only the visual ads is more than just visuals sight cannot guarantee maximum sales for a company. While I concede that advertisements make a product look striking, the problem is that it does not translate into sales unless the price and the feature's ratio is balanced. As a result, a company’s sales are directly affected and they are bound to lower their prices to sustain their share in the market. Taking an example of the smartphones, plenty of companies are now advertising similar features for their newly launched devices, still, the consumer’s buying decision is associated with the pricing.

Usually, visuals stay in people’s memories for a short span and this is where a hands-on experience becomes a crucial factor for the successful outcome of products. Many supporters of the advertisement claim that virtual appearance of goods is enough for them to make a purchase. However, I would argue that advertisement may mislead at times, and hence final features don not appear to be the way these are advertised. Taking an example of automobiles, a reliable on-ground experience advocates the true value of products and translates into generating massive sales for the manufacturing brand.

In short, in conclusion, to conclude without challenging pricing, a company cannot boost their sales in the long run. Moreover, a practical experience is usually a better decision-maker point for the consumer instead of relying on an advertisement. Therefore, alone print and electronic media display of products are not sufficient. And what about tv? Radio? Campaigns with celebs? Sponsoring sports events? Other promotion tools?
3 sentences in the conclusion... it’s not the best time for experiments, I don’t know why you’ve made so many mistakes you never used to before.

@cansha @marosa

Hi,

I don’t know why you asked twice about the structure of to what extent questions if you were going to fully agree/disagree, but whatever.

Before I review your BPs: can you tell me please what your first main idea is?

ps probably you should focus more on task 2 for now.

 

[Sohaibkq]

Hi,

I don’t know why you asked twice about the structure of to what extent questions if you were going to fully agree/disagree, but whatever.

Before I review your BPs: can you tell me please what your first main idea is?

ps probably you should focus more on task 2 for now.

I decided to follow this pattern. I didn't agree with the statement. Then, i stated 2 reasons why advertisement alone doesn't help in generating maximum sales. Reasons: 1. Competitive price, 2. Other people's,s experience.

 

[marosa]

I decided to follow this pattern. I didn't agree with the statement. Then, i stated 2 reasons why advertisement alone doesn't help in generating maximum sales. Reasons: 1. Competitive price, 2. Other people's,s experience.

Of course you’re free to choose the approach, but let me tell you something.

Even though you think you completely disagreed, you actually mainly disagreed, because in your BP1 you’re saying that BESIDES being advertised the product also needs to be affordable and in BP2 you’re saying “advertisements may mislead at times”

You’re doing this subconsciously, because you wish to avoid going too extreme with your opinion, which is an efficient approach indeed. But since you gave a different opinion in the intro, your task response and cohesion&coherence has suffered greatly.

Instead, you could have said while ads help to promote products, they won’t be of much use if not supported by proper pricing and quality. Then BP1 how ads promote products, BP2 pricing and quality or BP2 pricing, BP3 quality.

Also, think about this: if ads are that unimportant as you’re claiming why do companies spend millions on ads?

Another thing to think on is would they ask a question, where you need to choose which side you’re on if one of the sides is a complete nonsense?

That’s why there is more chance to score 7+ if you mainly agree/disagree.

 

[marosa]

Taking an example of the smartphones, plenty of companies are now advertising similar features for their newly launched devices, still, the consumer’s buying decision is associated with the pricing.


Taking an example of automobiles, a reliable on-ground experience advocates the true value of products and translates into generating massive sales for the manufacturing brand.

@cansha @marosa

Example 1: if that was the case why would iphones be leaders while having the highest prices?


Example 2:
That’s not quite an example, because it’s too general. You could’ve said it about literally any product or service. Your example would be like discussing a case where even though a company spent millions of dollars on promotion, people would still choose the compatitor’s product, because it was of a better quality.

And again, if your example is good enough you won’t need ro say “for example”. So after writing an example ask yourself if the examiner will understand that it’s an example if you remove the phrase “for example”.

 

[marosa]

Reasons: 1. Competitive price, 2. Other people's,s experience.

Ok 1. Prices greatly affect sales. Why do you think prices can actually affect sales?

 

[Rehanyousaf]

I have no clue about the above two people. Honestly, I consciously decided not to read too many opinions on write the essay. There is no right or wrong approach. A good essay can be written following any approach but the most important point is whether you have a logical "story".

As far as "to what extent" and/or "discuss both sides and give your opinion" essays go - Both these can be written in different ways depending on how much content you have. One example in this post https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-38#post-7269377

My simple rule has been to use BP1 to explore the viewpoint / ideas I disagree with and use BP2 for the viewpoint I agree with. My reasoning is simple if you flip the order more often than not you will contradict yourself.

@cansha @marosa I know you guys are continuously answering same questions. I believe Sohaeb IS getting Shelly's point incorrect. Actually, as per her, to achieve a higher band, 7+ in TA, it is better to use other sides argument just to strengthen your arguments.

Take an example of a uniform which I believe should be part of the school. I will write a line about others' side of the argument and then strongly contradict it just to make my argument stronger.

School uniforms ensure that every child in a class is treated as equal. Some people argue that by making all children look the same, we are restricting their freedom of expression. While this is true to some extent, I still believe that school is the place to learn, not to express your individuality. And then your explanation/example related to your arguments.

If I'm not mistaken I might have read this recommendation probably by you as well in one of the posts. So It's not that we have to discuss another side, it is just to make your argument stronger.

For Sohaeb, Shelly has also recommended that DON'T USE THIS METHOD IF YOU ARE CONFUSE ABOUT IT. AND, THIS DOESN'T REQUIRE AT ALL TO SCORE 7 IN TA. YOU CAN STILL SCORE 7+ WITHOUT USING THIS METHOD.