Mrs B;
I certainly understand your frustrations. In my opinion, it should be that way to discourage people from coming to Canada, marrying, and staying here. Not allowing people to work will discourage them from going the inland route.
We discussed what we would do if my fiance was granted a TRV, since processing in Accra will be about 18 months. I told him if he could get into Canada, we should have him stay and apply inland so we could be together. He said no way, he wants to do things the proper route, and does not like the idea of not being able to work, and not being able to appeal if the decision didn't go our way.
So I'm in Alberta, and he's in Nigeria, and we are crossing our fingers that he might be here by Christmas 2011. In the meantime, I will settle for seeing him twice a year, knowing that eventually he will land here and we can be together as a family.
I'm sure the finances are stressful for you, and it's never optimal for a husband not to be working. I just urge you to be patient, and really enjoy each other. Do not let the stress of the procedure or finances drive you apart. Remember the hundreds and thousands of people across Canada who would love to kiss their husband or wife each night as they go to bed. :-*