What to say at the border? Girlfriend, Fiancee or "Just Friends"? (long message)

[ManBurning]

Hello,

So, here is my scenario. I have a girlfriend who lives in the US and I live in Canada. She wants to move here to be with me, and we are wondering how to go abouts doing it. We've talked about getting married, but we don't want anyone to think that she is marrying me to gain enterance to Canada.

We've known each other for about 12 years, we met along time ago online and were each others "first love" way back in the day when we were younger. But, we were too young to progress anything, we were 13-14 so as time went on, we kind of just came to teh realization that we wouldn't be together. We stayed in touch over the years off and on, and now we are in our mid 20s and have since then decided that we both love and care for each other now as we always have and want to take it to the next level.

We're not sure how to go abouts doing this. I mean, I am not opposed to marrying her at all, I love this girl so much, but what concerns me is all this talk about the immigration people thinking she might be trying to get into the country for the wrong reasons.

I am off to see her next week and I am wondering what to tell the border people, she wants me to tell them I am visitng my "fiancee" but I have been told that's a bad idea, because the border people don't like to hear that kind of stuff, because it raises alot of questions and makes them think people are trying to immigrate for the wrong reasons. My roomate, who married a guy in the US, and got rejected to live there and visit told me that I should stick to saying we are "Just friends" rather then getting into too much detail.

The only thing that poses a problem is, she really is serious about getting married, and like I said, so am I, but at the same time I don't want to rush the wedding, if I am getting married I want to make it worthwhile, not some half assed quick thing. So, what should we do? Do you think it would be fishy if I said "Going to visit a close friend" and then I come back and we're married... or if I say "I'm going to visit a close friend" and then a month or 2 later we are married.

This stuff has been taking a toll on my life recently, been so stressed out of how we are going to make this work. I still have the letters she sent me from back when we were teenagers 12 years ago, would that be enough proof that we really have known each other that long and out love is "genuine"?

 

[Leon]

Say girlfriend. That isn't a lie and yet doesn't make you sound like you are about to get married.

 

[ManBurning]

Excellent! Thanks for the advice.

Been reading over the application forms all evening for residence, boy are they a headache and a half!

This is what I have figured out so far from all this:

-When we get married, she is entitled to come here as a visitor here for up to 6 months.
-Once here I apply for a sponsorship, which can take up to 30 days

Now...Here's where it gets a little mis-leading.
Should the next step be, she applys to EXTEND her "temporary residence visa" or should we just flat out skip that and go straight for the permenant residence visa.

It's my understanding, if we choose to apply for a PR visa right away, she still must follow the 6 month golden rule, even though that process can take longer then 6 months, on average 9, but in rare cases all the way up to 18 months.

Do I have all this right?
So, should we even waste time with the Temp. application, or just go straight for the PR?

 

[Leon]

She can visit you for up to 6 montfhs, even before you get married but she can not officially move to
Canada until she gets PR. If she wants to stay longer than 6 months, she can apply for a visit status extension.

You can apply to sponsor her inland or outland.

Inland means that she has to stay in Canada. Along with this application, you can apply for her visit status extension and open work permit to be granted when she gets first stage approval. If all goes well, she could have first stage approval in 6-7 months and PR in a year-18 months. If it goes badly and they want an interview with her, the file will be forwarded to the local CIC office without first stage approval and you may have to wait for their interview for 1-3 years without work permit and without health care coverage.

Outland means that she can stay with you on visit visa or stay in the US or go back and forth. They will take 36 days to approve you as a sponsor, then send the file to Buffalo and take 4-9 months there. After that she gets PR.

It's up to you if you apply inland or outland but because of the downsides of inland and relatively faster processing of outland, outland would be more recommended for somebody from the US.

 

[mud504@yahoo]

I've always said visiting boyfriend/husband with no problem at the US/Canada border. The same with my husband when he crosses over to the states to visit me. When we did intend on getting married on one visit with him here he did not mention that as he was going through customs, just treated like he was only comming to visit as normal.

Will this be your guys first meet? The letters you have will count as proof, whether it will be sufficient enough to satisfy the officer on you case I couldnt tell you. You could also use any emails or chat logs from the internet as proof. If your or her family is aware of the relationship they could write letters to be included showing the support that the relationship is genuine. Any reciepts of gifts, money or cards sent between one another. You are allowed also to write your own letters to included with your application. I did, and I made it clear that I had no other purpose or intentions to want to move to Canada besides to be with my husband. In the end you might have to get married for the immigration process depending on you situation. If you have any quesitons feel free to keep asking, it is a very stressful process.

 

[ManBurning]

Mud>> thanks for the info.

So, I see from your signature, you have already begun your process quite a few months ago. I guess I could havea few questions about that. Where abouts are you currently living? Are you living in Canada with your husband while the applciation is being processed, or are you still living in the US and just visiting each other when you can?

Also, with the sponsoring of the spouse...Did your husband need to make/meet certain income requirments for the sponsorship to be approved? I noticed it says that you need to financially support them durning their stay in canada. When filling the form there is a question for your income. I read that if you put N/A that it doesn't matter one way or another if you type in an amount or leave it blank, is this true? Are thee certain income requirements that need to be met for sponsoring someone?

I guess those are the only questions I have right now.

As for your comments, yeah this will be the first time we meet. That's why I don't want to make it seem fishy or have anyone raise an eyebrow if we are looking to get married. I noticed there is also a question on one of the forms that states when the first time you met them in person was. But that doesn't nesecarily mean that's how long you knew them right? I mean, that question is a little mis-leading, because us knowing each other for 12 years and then meeting is a ittle different then someone knowing someone for 2 months, the meeting and then gettign married right?

Yeah, I don't think we would have a problem in regards to her family vouching for the fact the relationship is real, to this date her mother still teases her about when she was a kid, she would call me long distance in Canada and talk for hours not knowing it was going to cost anything hahaha.. So when she got the phone bill, needless to say, it was not pretty! Her mom tells that to everyone apparently. If she still had that phone bill, then THAT would be awesome! haha. But who keeps phone bills from 10-12 years ago laying around eh?

 

[torbole]

I have a similar question to this "fiance', boyfriend (in my case), or just friends - which we are NOT...it's more than that. My boyfriend wants to come here to be with me, and I want that too. Problem is, he can't get in at the moment on Skilled Worker. He has the work experience, but doesn't have a HIGH command of English. I was told the only way for him to come to Canada would be a job offer - which he doesn't have and is difficult to obtain. The other way would be to come as a tourist (from a visa-exempt country, he would NOT need a Visitor's visa) for 2-3 months, then apply for a study permit to study English as a Second Language (I'm saying a study permit because I want him to stay past the 6 month "golden rule". This could take him to at least 9-10 months. My first question is, does he have to leave Canada (say to Buffalo) to apply for a study permit or even a tourist extension?? Here is my "other" dilemma: I would like to sponsor him, but obviously I cannot sponsor him as a common-law, as we do NOT live together now. Sponsoring as a conjugal is very difficult - hard to prove (I've been told this by many people, including an Immigration lawyer). Now if he comes here on as a tourist, then applies to extend either as tourist (which may arouse suspicion) or apply to extend in order to study English (which could also be denied depending on the IO), are we allowed to purchase things together (or pay for bills in both names) if he is here as a tourist or student?? No one has been able to answer this question thoroughly for me. Can we open a savings account together?? Is this allowed?? Basically, we want to live together, and marry eventually, but not right now to satisfy Immigration. We don't believe that is right!! Marriage must be something that comes with time, that comes with knowing the other person well enough to want to make that "commitment". We've known each other for 5 years, so it's not like we have just met. Can someone out there help me with these questions? I know that extensions of any kind always depend on the IO. Thanks!!

 

[Leon]

In every case, for a visit visa extension, study permit etc. they need to believe he will leave at the end of his visa and that he can support himself while he's in Canada (and pay his tuition if he's studying). I don't see why you couldn't add him to your bank account since he can open a bank account himself with just a passport. It looks to me that you can even apply for a study permit online if you are in Canada, see http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/e-services/index.asp As a student, he can go to Service Canada and apply for a temporary SIN. The bank is always happier if you have a SIN.

If he's denied visit visa extension and/or study permit and this is really not the way to do things or shouldn't be but some members on this board said they were advised to do it by border services and it worked, the guy had been denied visit visa extension so he left Canada with an already expired visit status (of course nobody checks when you leave). He spent a few days in the US and then came back to Canada and was given a brand new 6 month visit visa so if nothing else works, that's something to try.

 

[mud504@yahoo]

Mud>> thanks for the info.

So, I see from your signature, you have already begun your process quite a few months ago. I guess I could havea few questions about that. Where abouts are you currently living? Are you living in Canada with your husband while the applciation is being processed, or are you still living in the US and just visiting each other when you can?

Also, with the sponsoring of the spouse...Did your husband need to make/meet certain income requirments for the sponsorship to be approved? I noticed it says that you need to financially support them durning their stay in canada. When filling the form there is a question for your income. I read that if you put N/A that it doesn't matter one way or another if you type in an amount or leave it blank, is this true? Are thee certain income requirements that need to be met for sponsoring someone?

I guess those are the only questions I have right now.

As for your comments, yeah this will be the first time we meet. That's why I don't want to make it seem fishy or have anyone raise an eyebrow if we are looking to get married. I noticed there is also a question on one of the forms that states when the first time you met them in person was. But that doesn't nesecarily mean that's how long you knew them right? I mean, that question is a little mis-leading, because us knowing each other for 12 years and then meeting is a ittle different then someone knowing someone for 2 months, the meeting and then gettign married right?

Yeah, I don't think we would have a problem in regards to her family vouching for the fact the relationship is real, to this date her mother still teases her about when she was a kid, she would call me long distance in Canada and talk for hours not knowing it was going to cost anything hahaha.. So when she got the phone bill, needless to say, it was not pretty! Her mom tells that to everyone apparently. If she still had that phone bill, then THAT would be awesome! haha. But who keeps phone bills from 10-12 years ago laying around eh?

I'm currently still in the states. I will be landing sometime in the next few months. My visa expires in January. Because we did spousal sponsorship my husband did not have to meet any income requirements. As far as leaving that quesiton blank I'm not sure how big of a deal it is. I filled it in, because the option C printout along with the letter from employer that we had 2 included stated that amount anyway. As long as their are no other dependents involved you will not have to meet any income requirements.

As for that misleading question there were a few I had with different dates. One says when the relationship started. I put the date that we consider to be our anniversary of getting together which was a couple years after net chatting. Another question said when did you first meet and i believe it went on to ask where and so on so I assumed it wanted in person which I put the date that I first went to Canada to meet him. And there was another quesiton that asked when you first communicated to one another and for that I put a rough guesstimate of when I met him online.

The only phone bills I had were my most recent ones like within the last 2 years which didn't account for much of our phone conversations. We texted alot so I included those bills where it showed texting fee's although it did not say exactly who I was texting. Anything you can find would probably help you. Since our relationship is pretty much internet based I took screen captures of games we play online together, movies we watch online together etc.

Also don't be so naieve as i was when going through customs. I was so excited to see my now husband for the first time and knowing nothing of what to expect when crossing the border I went in talking to the officer with a big smile about how I was going to meet a man that I met online lol they kept me there a few extra minutes questioning me and my safety. But I assured them that mine and his family was aware of the trip and that I had a bus ticket and money to go home on "if things didnt work out" I believe thats how the officer put it. I know I read somewhere on here that someone else was having difficulty when he said his significant other online, don't remember exactly who it was tho. Good Luck I hope your first meet goes well

 

[Leon]

Yeah, there is a guy here who got flagged because at some point he went to Canada saying he was going to meet somebody he had met online and the IO decided he must be a major weirdo and red-flagged him in their computers. Since then, he's always pulled aside and double checked when he's coming to Canada.

 

[torbole]

Thanks mud and Leon for your answers. They've helped. However, what will happen if I decide to sponsor him later on (in a year) as "common-law"?? Will they reject him?? I mean it's the only way that he can enter Canada at the moment without getting married. Leon: will they allow him another 6 month "visit" if he exists and enters after a few days?? Or does it all depend on the IO at Border?? We want everything to be legal.

 

[torbole]

One other thing........does the "student visa" have to be for a College or University Degree??

 

[Leon]

Thanks mud and Leon for your answers. They've helped. However, what will happen if I decide to sponsor him later on (in a year) as "common-law"?? Will they reject him?? I mean it's the only way that he can enter Canada at the moment without getting married. Leon: will they allow him another 6 month "visit" if he exists and enters after a few days?? Or does it all depend on the IO at Border?? We want everything to be legal.

As long as you can prove that you have lived togehter for 12 months and that your relationship is real and not a sham for PR, then he will not be rejected. Many common-laws qualify by visit visa and extension.

If he exits and enters again after a few days, it totally depends on the IO at the border. The proper way would be to apply for extension which you should do when he has 30 days left on his visa and takes currently 101 days, see http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/information/times/canada/process-in.asp#temp_res After his 6 months were up, he would have implied status and after the 101 day processing, he would have a yes or a no. That is what happened to that other couple, they got a no and after talking to the border services, they were advised by them apparently to go to the US and come back so that's what they did and in their case, it worked.

 

[Leon]

One other thing........does the "student visa" have to be for a College or University Degree??

No, you can also study languages or something else, see http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/study/schools.asp

 

[torbole]

Thanks Leon!! You are a wealth of knowledge. I hope it works for us too!! My fiance' is very "pessimistic" and feels that they won't allow him back in.