The OP, bestofluck, initially seemed to be very optimistic. Made very hopeful statements, and at times bordering on false hopes.
Now, he seemed to be at the direct opposite end. Declararions such as this would cause speculation and undue panic.
Bestofluck, I'm not sure what happened to you. You were a source of high hopes, albeit very unrealistic and to at fault at times. Now, you seem to be very pessimistic. I guess the adage can be applied here, "the bigger they (hope) are, the harder they (hope) fall".
I still trust that you can behave just nice in between, and not extremes. Giving (false) hopes, and now sinking fellow aspirants with unnecessary discouragements.