Kingston,Jamaica

[susanrichards2015]

So surprising to me that someone would want to prevent their child from ever having a wonderful life in Canada.... Blows my mind.

That's the thing, I can understand that she doesn't want her son going with his dad permanently but what about summer holidays or a visits here and than?? Its sad now because his son will never be able to be filed for and we will never be able to assist him in coming here. The child's own mother did this.

 

[susanrichards2015]

Yes for sure. I have an ex husband and a child with him. I would NEVER keep him from his dad (even though he doesn't pay support and hasn't for years) as long as my son is safe and loved I would never prevent him from being a part of the other side of the family. He didn't ask to be brought into this world, nor have his parents split up. Jamaica is so poor, for the most part, and for a mother, a person who should want the absolute best for their child in any way shape or form to prevent their child from having a better life than they possibly did, shameful.

I agree. No father or mother regardless of the lack of support he or she may or may not provide should ever have the child withheld. The mother is bitter and to put it nicely, she can go fly a kite...

 

[Spartabarbiie]

That's the thing, I can understand that she doesn't want her son going with his dad permanently but what about summer holidays or a visits here and than?? Its sad now because his son will never be able to be filed for and we will never be able to assist him in coming here. The child's own mother did this.

Wow, hopefully as her son ages he doesn't hold a grudge against her knowing this. I'm sure you and your husband aren't trying to "take him away" if she feels so threatened she needs to check herself and her mothering skills. I know someone can never replace me. My ex and his gf (baby mother) get along just fine. She doesn't threaten me at all, she'll never be my sons mom, but if she loves him like her own, awesome for my son! More people in a child's life the better. No wonder your ex isn't with her anymore... She obviously is only thinking of herself and not her child's future. And at some point, he CAN choose who he wants to live with, so, she better be cautious what she's doing now. Sad. So happy my husband doesn't have any children here. Can't imagine how hard that must be.

 

[TRISHGD]

That's the thing, I can understand that she doesn't want her son going with his dad permanently but what about summer holidays or a visits here and than?? Its sad now because his son will never be able to be filed for and we will never be able to assist him in coming here. The child's own mother did this.

Its quite common. One of my husband ex told us that she doesnt want her kid with any step mother and she doesnt want anything from us either. So i just bypassed her. The twin 's mom was ok with it

 

[TRISHGD]

I agree. No father or mother regardless of the lack of support he or she may or may not provide should ever have the child withheld. The mother is bitter and to put it nicely, she can go fly a kite...

Some exs are bitter.

 

[susanrichards2015]

Wow, hopefully as her son ages he doesn't hold a grudge against her knowing this. I'm sure you and your husband aren't trying to "take him away" if she feels so threatened she needs to check herself and her mothering skills. I know someone can never replace me. My ex and his gf (baby mother) get along just fine. She doesn't threaten me at all, she'll never be my sons mom, but if she loves him like her own, awesome for my son! More people in a child's life the better. No wonder your ex isn't with her anymore... She obviously is only thinking of herself and not her child's future. And at some point, he CAN choose who he wants to live with, so, she better be cautious what she's doing now. Sad. So happy my husband doesn't have any children here. Can't imagine how hard that must be.

It is very difficult for my husband, I can't even understand how he feels. I just try to be supportive. As for me, she never tried to know me or get to know me. She saw my colour and made her decision from there.

 

[Spartabarbiie]

On a different note, cannot wait to see this "update" or whatever they're doing on the website on the 23! Let's hope this shows us some good news.... Anyone know how "often" they update the processing times on Tuesday's? It hasn't been since July 11

 

[TRISHGD]

Not true. We were in this position and my hubby just had to get a letter notarized that he understands that he will never be able to sponsor him and understands the consequences that may come.

I think in my friends case they did want to be able to sponsor the son at a later date

 

[TRISHGD]

On a different note, cannot wait to see this "update" or whatever they're doing on the website on the 23! Let's hope this shows us some good news.... Anyone know how "often" they update the processing times on Tuesday's? It hasn't been since July 11

I hope so to cause Kingston is going to slow for my liking even though i have ways to go

 

[Spartabarbiie]

It is very difficult for my husband, I can't even understand how he feels. I just try to be supportive. As for me, she never tried to know me or get to know me. She saw my colour and made her decision from there.

She's definitely threatened by you. That's unfortunate cuz I'm sure you never had or wanted to have a problem with her. She could have just by passed a really good supportive friend.

 

[Spartabarbiie]

I hope so to cause Kingston is going to slow for my liking even though i have ways to go

Me too, so annoying. I'm leaving JA August 19, and I know my husband won't be coming back with me yet AGAIN.... We applied sept 2.... Was so hoping to hear something by July. Errrrr

 

[susanrichards2015]

Me too, so annoying. I'm leaving JA August 19, and I know my husband won't be coming back with me yet AGAIN.... We applied sept 2.... Was so hoping to hear something by July. Errrrr

I leave the day the new thing comes out. I won't be able to check until I get to JA

 

[JUSTALONELYGAL]

I may get a lot of flack for saying this but i;m gonna say it, none of us knows what the relationship between our exes and their children mothers were prior to getting together with us, a friend of mine from alberta just went down yesterday and she called her parents last night crying because she found texts in her husbands phone showing that he's still sleeping with his child's mother proving that they were most likely still together when they got married, she was supposed to stay there until September now she's in a rush to leave so when you call these women bitter that may be true but why are they bitter?? For most of our relationship we are away from our husbands we have no idea what they're really doing all we have to do is have faith and hope for the best, I understand why some of these women don't want to send their children ppl are talking about a better life money doesn't always provide a better life the education system back there is much better than the Canadian one and they make do with whatever they have so calling JA poor and just blinding judging these women shows a lot, remember these children don't know you their father does but the children haven't gotten to know you in the traditional sense of being around you etc etc prior to their fathers marrying you and when they come here you will be the ones more than likely taking care of them most of the time, the mothers do not know you so i understand their side of it, having said that i would at least allow the child to do the medical so as they get older they have the options of coming here later on in life, put the shoe on the other foot i'm sure a lot of you wouldn't send your child off to live in a new country with a total stranger and your miles away yes daddy would be there but like i said most of the caring won't be coming from him because he would be out working. So try to understand just lend support to your husbands and let him deal with his child's mother this is between them and not you so don't directly get involved.

 

[susanrichards2015]

I may get a lot of flack for saying this but i;m gonna say it, none of us knows what the relationship between our exes and their children mothers were prior to getting together with us, a friend of mine from alberta just went down yesterday and she called her parents last night crying because she found texts in her husbands phone showing that he's still sleeping with his child's mother proving that they were most likely still together when they got married, she was supposed to stay there until September now she's in a rush to leave so when you call these women bitter that may be true but why are they bitter?? For most of our relationship we are away from our husbands we have no idea what they're really doing all we have to do is have faith and hope for the best, I understand why some of these women don't want to send their children ppl are talking about a better life money doesn't always provide a better life the education system back there is much better than the Canadian one and they make do with whatever they have so calling JA poor and just blinding judging these women shows a lot, remember these children don't know you their father does but the children haven't gotten to know you in the traditional sense of being around you etc etc prior to their fathers marrying you and when they come here you will be the ones more than likely taking care of them most of the time, the mothers do not know you so i understand their side of it, having said that i would at least allow the child to do the medical so as they get older they have the options of coming here later on in life, put the shoe on the other foot i'm sure a lot of you wouldn't send your child off to live in a new country with a total stranger and your miles away yes daddy would be there but like i said most of the caring won't be coming from him because he would be out working. So try to understand just lend support to your husbands and let him deal with his child's mother this is between them and not you so don't directly get involved.

Firstly, I get your point however my situation is different from your friends. I have been with this man for 6 years as of September. The mother has never tried at all to make any form of communication with me unless it involves her benefiting from it. As originally mentioned, I do not want to run off anywhere with her child, I have one of my own. The fact that the father (my husband) cannot include his own child whom he pays child support for on an immigration application is utterly ridiculous. He clearly told her that he has no intentions of taking his son. The fact that the child cannot even ever visit us or ever be sponsored by his own father is a sin. Tell me now....what happens to the son when my husband reaches Canada and God forbid the mother sick or worse, dead and the child is left with no parent and no way to get here because she was too selfish to set his future in place?? These woman need to stop thinking of themselves and think of what is right for the child. He doesn't need to come now but having the medical on file and having him documented will open up a lot of doors for him the future for both jobs and education. Yes, Jamaica's education is a lot more advanced than Canada's but that is not a good enough reason to withhold the child from his dad. This is specific to my situation and I feel for your friend because that's messed up what she's going through however everyone's situation is unique.

 

[impatientwife]

I may get a lot of flack for saying this but i;m gonna say it, none of us knows what the relationship between our exes and their children mothers were prior to getting together with us, a friend of mine from alberta just went down yesterday and she called her parents last night crying because she found texts in her husbands phone showing that he's still sleeping with his child's mother proving that they were most likely still together when they got married, she was supposed to stay there until September now she's in a rush to leave so when you call these women bitter that may be true but why are they bitter?? For most of our relationship we are away from our husbands we have no idea what they're really doing all we have to do is have faith and hope for the best, I understand why some of these women don't want to send their children ppl are talking about a better life money doesn't always provide a better life the education system back there is much better than the Canadian one and they make do with whatever they have so calling JA poor and just blinding judging these women shows a lot, remember these children don't know you their father does but the children haven't gotten to know you in the traditional sense of being around you etc etc prior to their fathers marrying you and when they come here you will be the ones more than likely taking care of them most of the time, the mothers do not know you so i understand their side of it, having said that i would at least allow the child to do the medical so as they get older they have the options of coming here later on in life, put the shoe on the other foot i'm sure a lot of you wouldn't send your child off to live in a new country with a total stranger and your miles away yes daddy would be there but like i said most of the caring won't be coming from him because he would be out working. So try to understand just lend support to your husbands and let him deal with his child's mother this is between them and not you so don't directly get involved.

Woah this is almost like a daytime drama up in here lol I feel sorry for your friend I can't imagine having to make such a discovery and you've made some great points I'll just leave it at that before I give myself a headache thinking about the what ifs