IELTS - Writing - For Band 7 or Above.

[arana123]

@cansha

Below is one more I wrote, could you please have a look:


Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime.

Discuss both views and give your opinion


Many individuals believe that the effective way to suppress the crime rate is to award lengthy jail time whilst others think that there are better alternates for lowering down the illegal activities. This essay will discuss both point of views, but in my opinion, awarding less jail time with more free community work time is a best way to overcome illegal acts.


Spending a substantial amount of time in prison certainly teaches a hard lesson to the inmates for not being involved or execute any illegal activities. Also, this sets an example for potential lawbreakers who might be engaged in any type of criminal act. For example, a recent study conducted by New York state shows that more number of years people spend in prison, less likely they return back to the prison, mainly due to the lengthy punishment they served. Therefore, it is clear that longer prison time has a high success rate in bringing down the criminal activities.


However, on other hand, an idea to minimize the crime rate is by awarding less jail time but more free community service such as cleaning on highways, schools, hospitals, religious centre, etc. This way inmate will learn some real time work experience. In addition to that, while doing community work, order inmates to wear their jail suits so that everyone can identify inmates and can learn from their punishments. For instance, Singapore government makes inmates to do more community work rather than jail time, in order to teach others a lesson.


In conclusion, firstly, awarding longer jail time will surely reduce crime by existing and future inmates and secondly, giving less jail time and more unpaid community work is an another way to reduce crime. However, I believe, less jail time and more community work is always better for the society and inmates.

 

[marosa]

Some people think that the internet has brought people closer together while others think that people and communities are becoming more isolated.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.


Although it is considered by some that along with development and popularization of the Internet the society has become more isolated, others opine that it has led to an opposite effect. I agree to the latter point of view and believe that Web has enabled people become more connected, since it provides them with more opportunities to communicate with one another.

On the one hand, it is commonly believed that the Internet is an efficient tool to interact with others, as it enables both long distance and instant connection, and I agree. A fundamental reason for this is that with cutting-edge technologies it has become possible to get in touch with anyone around the globe in few seconds: would that be a friend who lives abroad, or an international business partner. Currently there is a wide range of various applications and websites with the help of which a person can send instant messages, voice recordings and make video calls. In addition, with the Internet it has become possible to maintain relationships with friends and family even when people work under tough conditions and do not have enough time to meet them physically.

On the other hand, some people disagree with the abovementioned opinion, as the Internet might drag people into virtual reality and potentially minimize real life communication. To substantiate such a point of view it is suggested that online communication can have psychological repercussions on the users by making them detach themselves from the surrounding environment. As a result, the more time one spends surfing the Internet, the less attached they can become with relatives and friends; however, no factual evidence to support this idea has been reported. Moreover, it can be often noticed how people remain connected to the society, simply because they are able to constantly chat to those who they know in real life online.

To conclude, while people may vary in their opinions, I think that online technologies are most likely to have a favorable impact on human interaction, since the Internet has made socialization among people and communities easier and faster.

 

[cansha]

Hi @cansha - I am going to take my IELTS exam soon. I have seen that you are trying to help people out in finding out their mistakes, especially in Writing module. I would also like to request you to have a look at my below task 2. I would be grateful, if you could help me out:

Task 2: Tradition and Culture is getting ruined with the rise of technology. Do you agree or disagree? (This is just the essence of the real question)

Below is my response:

Welcome to the thread. I will try to help as much as I can but it would be good if you spend sometime on this thread and read other reviews. That will help a lot. Now let's review the essay.

It is argued that traditions and cultures will be vanished with the growth of technology and science. There is a big difference between "ruin" and "vanish". I think this almost borders on bringing your own argument rather than paraphrasing the topic line.
This essay agrees that this technical advancement is hammering on traditional values and cultures. If you go back a few pages you will see I always suggest never to use such phrases. The question is DO YOU not does your essay agree or disagree? Do not write in third person.
Firstly, this will discuss how technical revolution is bringing western culture which is not very welcomed by many countries in the east and secondly, with the help of technology, western movies are being watched and dismantling the relationship chords. Chord or cord?

Okay the good thing is the introduction is atleast different. This is not generic like many essays we have seen on the thread. You have tried to give a glimpse of your arguments. BUT the language needs to be direct. It is YOUR OWN opinion and not essay's opinion.

Albeit, technology companies are offering jobs around the globe however, this is a direct way to invite western cultures and traditions. Okay stop for a minute and think. You are giving IELTS to immigrate to Canada which is a western country. How good is this argument that you are blaming western culture here. Honestly I find such arguments banal but there is nothing in IELTS that stops you from writing it.
Nowadays, youths are eagerly following western habits such as way of dressing, food habits, etc.Though, there is no harm in in knowing and understanding different culture but leaving own values and inheriting others will certainly diminish the traditional values. For instance, due to the explosion in IT industry in India, a lot of youngsters are not preferring Indian Cuisines and want to have American, Mexican and Italian dishes. Therefore, it is clear that Information Technology is a big reason for disturbing traditions. I don't think this argument makes sense at all. So, people are eating different cuisines that means culture is finished?? Seriously? Not sure how you would score on task response based on this.

Due to the enormous boost in the Technology sector, now people have freedom of watching western movies or cinemas which do not match with the eastern countries' traditions. The content of these western movies is not censored, hence there are solid chances of people having a different and uncensored approach. What does this even mean? For example, filing for divorce and live in relationship are quite acceptable concept in Western countries however, they are not regular topic to show in Indian movies. Therefore, it is crystal clear that watching western movies gives has a direct impact of people's lives and their relationships with their partners. Same feedback as above. I think task response is bad.

In conclusion, technical advancement is no good for traditional and cultural values as people are following western cultures and lifestyle and leaving theirs, also, people are getting uncensored content which is impacting people's thought about relationships.

The structure of conclusion is actually good. You have reiterated your main points nicely (although I don't think they are good enough).

So okay overall I think biggest positive is that you understand the structure of IELTS and what is expected. If you make the adjustments in Introduction than you have structure pretty much nailed down.

Now comes the question of content and task response. I think one essay is not enough to say that it is a big issue for you. In this essay it is not good (my opinion) but you may have good content in some other topic. So, keep writing.

And finally, there are grammatical mistakes which should be avoided. Like missing article. I generally don't give too much feedback on grammar because it is most difficult thing to fix. You do not have major issues with grammar anyways.

All the best!

 

[arana123]

Welcome to the thread. I will try to help as much as I can but it would be good if you spend sometime on this thread and read other reviews. That will help a lot. Now let's review the essay.

It is argued that traditions and cultures will be vanished with the growth of technology and science. There is a big difference between "ruin" and "vanish". I think this almost borders on bringing your own argument rather than paraphrasing the topic line.
This essay agrees that this technical advancement is hammering on traditional values and cultures. If you go back a few pages you will see I always suggest never to use such phrases. The question is DO YOU not does your essay agree or disagree? Do not write in third person.
Firstly, this will discuss how technical revolution is bringing western culture which is not very welcomed by many countries in the east and secondly, with the help of technology, western movies are being watched and dismantling the relationship chords. Chord or cord?

Okay the good thing is the introduction is atleast different. This is not generic like many essays we have seen on the thread. You have tried to give a glimpse of your arguments. BUT the language needs to be direct. It is YOUR OWN opinion and not essay's opinion.

Albeit, technology companies are offering jobs around the globe however, this is a direct way to invite western cultures and traditions. Okay stop for a minute and think. You are giving IELTS to immigrate to Canada which is a western country. How good is this argument that you are blaming western culture here. Honestly I find such arguments banal but there is nothing in IELTS that stops you from writing it.
Nowadays, youths are eagerly following western habits such as way of dressing, food habits, etc.Though, there is no harm in in knowing and understanding different culture but leaving own values and inheriting others will certainly diminish the traditional values. For instance, due to the explosion in IT industry in India, a lot of youngsters are not preferring Indian Cuisines and want to have American, Mexican and Italian dishes. Therefore, it is clear that Information Technology is a big reason for disturbing traditions. I don't think this argument makes sense at all. So, people are eating different cuisines that means culture is finished?? Seriously? Not sure how you would score on task response based on this.

Due to the enormous boost in the Technology sector, now people have freedom of watching western movies or cinemas which do not match with the eastern countries' traditions. The content of these western movies is not censored, hence there are solid chances of people having a different and uncensored approach. What does this even mean? For example, filing for divorce and live in relationship are quite acceptable concept in Western countries however, they are not regular topic to show in Indian movies. Therefore, it is crystal clear that watching western movies gives has a direct impact of people's lives and their relationships with their partners. Same feedback as above. I think task response is bad.

In conclusion, technical advancement is no good for traditional and cultural values as people are following western cultures and lifestyle and leaving theirs, also, people are getting uncensored content which is impacting people's thought about relationships.

The structure of conclusion is actually good. You have reiterated your main points nicely (although I don't think they are good enough).

So okay overall I think biggest positive is that you understand the structure of IELTS and what is expected. If you make the adjustments in Introduction than you have structure pretty much nailed down.

Now comes the question of content and task response. I think one essay is not enough to say that it is a big issue for you. In this essay it is not good (my opinion) but you may have good content in some other topic. So, keep writing.

And finally, there are grammatical mistakes which should be avoided. Like missing article. I generally don't give too much feedback on grammar because it is most difficult thing to fix. You do not have major issues with grammar anyways.

All the best!

 

[arana123]

Hello @cansha -

I was eagerly waiting for your reply and I am glad I got the feedback from you. All of your comments/feedbacks are certainly valuable to me. Thank you for your time and effort. You are doing great help on this forum.

Looks like the major issue is with the task response which I am seeing that I am improving. Earlier, I was having difficulty in thinking about relevant ideas. Also, few wrong synonyms I used such as "Vanished".

Thanks

 

[satish shingari]

Please evaluate this essay and highlight the issues so that I can concentrate more on my weaknesses.


The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider, the rich is becoming richer and the poor are getting even poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?


Equal status of all the people is nowhere seen in the economy of any nation. The difference between the income level of rich and poor is growing day by day. This essay will discuss the possible repercussions resulting from this scenario and different actions that can be taken to fill this gap.

Several problems are association with this rising gap in the level of earning among these two sections of society. To begin with, most of the basic necessities of life will become dearer due to increase in demand of commodities which are scare resulting into rise in price of the most of the commodities which will be out of range of one segment of society who cannot afford these at the prevailing prices. For instance, a recent report published by World Bank reveals that poor countries are getting more and more funds from other developed nations resulting in increase in gap in development of these countries. In addition, various social evils will take birth in the form of illiteracy, unemployment, poverty since weaker section of community will not be able to avail socio economic opportunities due to financial constraints. Furthermore, It will put a huge pressure on government funds to be spent on welfare of minority which are otherwise available for infrastructure development. Hence, it will have drastic impact on economy of the country.

In order to overcome the possible negative impacts arising out of this situation, different measures are required to be taken. Firstly there should be control on increasing rate of population growth. A number of problems will automatically get solve if population growth rate is controlled since demand will get control. Government can introduce various family planning programs in this direction. Education is another weapon to mitigate the negative effects. There must be free education for the financially handicapped group of society. Such kind of actions can contribute a lot in the interest of all stakeholders.

In conclusion, Needless to say that numerous issues can emerge on account of growing gap in the income of rich and poor and certain immediate actions are need of the hour to reduce the gap to a greater extent.

 

[cansha]

Some people think that the internet has brought people closer together while others think that people and communities are becoming more isolated.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Although it is considered by some that along with development and popularization I understand why you are doing it but you're making your essay verbose. If possible keep your paraphrasing as simple as possible.
of the Internet the society has become more isolated, others opine that it has led to an opposite effect. See what happened here. By the time you reached the end you probably realized the sentence is becoming longer than expected and hence you ended with "Opposite effect" to avoid writing even a longer sentence. So I go back again to the point avoid verbosity.
I agree to the latter point of view and believe Again too much verbosity. If you wrote simple I believe web ... or In my opinion web ... It would be the same. Just come to the point.
that Web has enabled people become more connected, since it provides them with more opportunities to communicate with one another. So good thing opinion is clear and you have attempted to give a glimpse of why you have that opinion (which I always advocate and I like here). BUT the reasoning is too vague. What does more opportunity mean? Now I know you would say that is what I want to explain in my essay. That is a fair point but you can still give a little more context to the opinion within introduction.

On the one hand, it is commonly believed that the Internet is an efficient tool to interact with others, as it enables both long distance and instant connection, and I agree. This sentence has so many issues. First it is just a repetition of introduction sentence and second refer to point 2.1 https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485

A fundamental reason for this is that with cutting-edge technologies it has become possible to get in touch with anyone around the globe in few seconds: would that be a friend who lives abroad, or an international business partner. Currently there is a wide range of various applications and websites with the help of which a person can send instant messages, voice recordings and make video calls. In addition, with the Internet it has become possible to maintain relationships with friends and family even when people work under tough conditions and do not have enough time to meet them physically. Okay what is the point. I don't understand what is the argument here?

On the other hand, some people disagree with the abovementioned opinion, as the Internet might drag people into virtual reality and potentially minimize real life communication. To substantiate such a point of view it is suggested that online communication can have psychological repercussions Seriously?? Why are you complicating a simple topic? on the users by making them detach themselves from the surrounding environment. As a result, the more time one spends surfing the Internet, the less attached they can become with relatives and friends; however, no factual evidence to support this idea has been reported. Moreover, it can be often noticed how people remain connected to the society, simply because they are able to constantly chat to those who they know in real life online.

I really don't understand the structure of the essay? I'm interested in finding out did you start writing the essay straightaway or did you write your bullet points and spent some time organizing those. Also refer to the point 2.5 https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485

To conclude, while people may vary in their opinions, I think that online technologies are most likely to have a favorable impact on human interaction, since the Internet has made socialization among people and communities easier and faster.

Please read whole section 3 https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485

So the positives are - You can write English. There are no big challenges as such in terms of language use or grammar. You have enough skill to crack IELTS.

I would say negative is that you are ignoring the most important aspect of IELTS essay i.e. Task response. I get a sense you are not spending enough time to think about the points you want to convey. Also, you are complicating a relatively easy topic.

I believe you can do much better than this. My suggestion would be do not write essay for some days under time pressure. Just try to write a good one for a few days. Nail down your thought process and organization of ideas and you would be able to crack this much faster than you think.

Wish you all the best!

 

[cansha]

Please evaluate this essay and highlight the issues so that I can concentrate more on my weaknesses.


The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider, the rich is becoming richer and the poor are getting even poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?


Equal status of all the people is nowhere seen in the economy of any nation. The difference between the income level of rich and poor is growing day by day. This essay will discuss the possible repercussions resulting from this scenario and different actions that can be taken to fill this gap.

Several problems are association with this rising gap in the level of earning among these two sections of society. To begin with, most of the basic necessities of life will become dearer due to increase in demand of commodities which are scare resulting into rise in price of the most of the commodities which will be out of range of one segment of society who cannot afford these at the prevailing prices. For instance, a recent report published by World Bank reveals that poor countries are getting more and more funds from other developed nations resulting in increase in gap in development of these countries. In addition, various social evils will take birth in the form of illiteracy, unemployment, poverty since weaker section of community will not be able to avail socio economic opportunities due to financial constraints. Furthermore, It will put a huge pressure on government funds to be spent on welfare of minority which are otherwise available for infrastructure development. Hence, it will have drastic impact on economy of the country.

In order to overcome the possible negative impacts arising out of this situation, different measures are required to be taken. Firstly there should be control on increasing rate of population growth. A number of problems will automatically get solve if population growth rate is controlled since demand will get control. Government can introduce various family planning programs in this direction. Education is another weapon to mitigate the negative effects. There must be free education for the financially handicapped group of society. Such kind of actions can contribute a lot in the interest of all stakeholders.

In conclusion, Needless to say that numerous issues can emerge on account of growing gap in the income of rich and poor and certain immediate actions are need of the hour to reduce the gap to a greater extent.

There are many common mistakes which have been discussed in this thread before. Read this post https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485 and come back with another one.

 

[cansha]

No new essays for a while. Hope prep for everyone is going well.

 

[R_H_T]

Hello,
Please evaluate this essay and highlight the issues so that I can concentrate more on my weaknesses.

Students are over loaded with home work nowadays from school. Rather than home work some believe that school should focus and give more time to other activities which will help them in their growth as by the over burden they lose their skill and abilities.
Do you agree or disagree?

In this competitive era, pupils has given more home work compared to past, as a result they might not only lose, but also unknown about their hidden skills. Some people believe instead of home work extra-curriculum activities will help in the growth of today's generation. I strongly agree with this statement and the reasons for my inclination are glanced through the ensuing paragraphs.

To commence with, other-activities like sport can make students physically as well as mentally strong. Sport can teach them many other skills such as leadership, decision making, team work. To cite an example, outdoor sport like football and indoor games like chess assist children in many different way. So, sport is equally essential for children.

Furthermore, students can also make their career decision while performing art or sport. In addition, when school focuses on other activities, students can come to know about their canny abilities that help to pursue a different future goal. For instance, M. S. Dhoni, an ex-caption of Indian cricket team was also aware about his wicket-keeping skill when he was in the school and now he is the best wicket-keeper of the world.

Last but not least, students, nowadays, are very stressed because of their academic curriculum which is not so good for their health, in that case other activities could work as a stress reliever. For example, as per a research conducted in China, more than 60% of students feel de-stress after doing painting or playing a game.

Agglomerating all the points elaborated above, it can be concluded that "All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy", students should not over loaded with home work, but they should be supported to do other than that.

 

[cansha]

Hello,
Please evaluate this essay and highlight the issues so that I can concentrate more on my weaknesses.

Students are over loaded with home work nowadays from school. Rather than home work some believe that school should focus and give more time to other activities which will help them in their growth as by the over burden they lose their skill and abilities.
Do you agree or disagree?

Welcome to the thread!

In this competitive era, pupils has have (subject verb agreement) given more home work compared to the past, as a result they might not only lose lose what?, but also unknown about their hidden skills. Sentence structure is bad. Inserting too many commas doesn't make a "complex" sentence. And in any case the not only ... but also construct makes no sense because you have not completed the phrases succeeding those key words.
Some people believe instead of home work extra-curriculum activities will help in the growth of today's generation. I strongly agree with this statement and the reasons for my inclination are glanced through the ensuing paragraphs. Your essay would look more interesting if you could give a glimpse of your essay in introduction. Point 1.6 https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485

To commence with, other-activities like sport can make students physically as well as mentally strong. Sport can teach them many other skills such as leadership, decision making, and team work. To cite an example, outdoor sport like football and indoor games like chess assist children in many different way. What ways? You want the reader to make the argument on your behalf. You are leaving it hanging. It impacts in many different ways without citing how?So, sport is equally essential for children. Sounds like a conclusion line. This is adding no value here. Just hanging.

Furthermore, students can also make their career decision while performing art or sport. I kind of get it what you wanted to say but this sentence has no meaning.
In addition, when school focuses on other activities, students can come to know about their canny abilities that help to pursue a different future goal. For instance, M. S. Dhoni, an ex-caption of Indian cricket team was also aware about his wicket-keeping skill when he was in the school and now he is the best wicket-keeper of the world.

Last but not least, students, nowadays, are very stressed because of their academic curriculum which is not so good for their health, in that case other activities could work as a stress reliever. For example, as per a research conducted in China, more than 60% of students feel de-stress after doing painting or playing a game. Ok this was a good argument but your sentence phrasing needs to be better.

Agglomerating all the points elaborated above, Heavy word but does it make sense here?
it can be concluded that "All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy", students should not over loaded with home work, but they should be supported to do other than that. Same issues again and again. What does this phrase even mean? You are leaving sentences hanging. To do what?

You need to spend sometime reading more about IELTS essay and what is expected. Also, spend some time reading sample essays.

 

[ryanvik]

Please evaluate the task2 GT essay
@cansha please evaluate

Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social,and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Today's generation of children are not only competing with their peers locally but with the children of the global world as well. Parents want their children to excel in every field, be it sports, study or competition, resulting in the child running through multiple of these activities every day, without even understanding their own personal interests. The pressure to excel in every field doesn't allow a child to properly blossom, resulting in them feeling insecured.

In addition, today the children, are exposed to a booming economy and technology, causing them to have much wider choices available in terms of consumables and fashion trends. Because of this, they always feel pressured in upgrading themselves to the latest gadgets and fashion trends to feel accepted in their social group. Be it latest smartphone model or the latest fashion line promoted by their favorite star. They always want to buy it, to keep themselves relevant in their social group and when they can not do this, they feel stressed out and become victims of anxiety.

More parental involvement and better grass root educational changes are required to allow children to bloom at their own pace. Parents should have more realistic expectation and they should encourage their child's interests. The educational institutes have a moral duty to instill modesty and build a healthy mindset and a positive outlook in every child.

To summarize, there is no doubt that the children of today are facing uphill pressure to stay relevant on multiple fronts, but steps such as better parental involvement and proactive educational initiative should be taken to bring back the innocence of childhood back.

 

[R_H_T]

Welcome to the thread!

In this competitive era, pupils has have (subject verb agreement) given more home work compared to the past, as a result they might not only lose lose what?, but also unknown about their hidden skills. Sentence structure is bad. Inserting too many commas doesn't make a "complex" sentence. And in any case the not only ... but also construct makes no sense because you have not completed the phrases succeeding those key words.
Some people believe instead of home work extra-curriculum activities will help in the growth of today's generation. I strongly agree with this statement and the reasons for my inclination are glanced through the ensuing paragraphs. Your essay would look more interesting if you could give a glimpse of your essay in introduction. Point 1.6 https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485

To commence with, other-activities like sport can make students physically as well as mentally strong. Sport can teach them many other skills such as leadership, decision making, and team work. To cite an example, outdoor sport like football and indoor games like chess assist children in many different way. What ways? You want the reader to make the argument on your behalf. You are leaving it hanging. It impacts in many different ways without citing how?So, sport is equally essential for children. Sounds like a conclusion line. This is adding no value here. Just hanging.

Furthermore, students can also make their career decision while performing art or sport. I kind of get it what you wanted to say but this sentence has no meaning.
In addition, when school focuses on other activities, students can come to know about their canny abilities that help to pursue a different future goal. For instance, M. S. Dhoni, an ex-caption of Indian cricket team was also aware about his wicket-keeping skill when he was in the school and now he is the best wicket-keeper of the world.

Last but not least, students, nowadays, are very stressed because of their academic curriculum which is not so good for their health, in that case other activities could work as a stress reliever. For example, as per a research conducted in China, more than 60% of students feel de-stress after doing painting or playing a game. Ok this was a good argument but your sentence phrasing needs to be better.

Agglomerating all the points elaborated above, Heavy word but does it make sense here?
it can be concluded that "All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy", students should not over loaded with home work, but they should be supported to do other than that. Same issues again and again. What does this phrase even mean? You are leaving sentences hanging. To do what?

You need to spend sometime reading more about IELTS essay and what is expected. Also, spend some time reading sample essays.

Thank you so much and sorry to disturb you.

 

[cansha]

Thank you so much and sorry to disturb you.

There is no disturbance buddy. You can post more if you like.

 

[Vvek]

Hi @cansha I know you might be extremely busy these days, but I would really appreciate if you could have some thoughts over my essay. I have been trying to figure out the structure and have been a silent follower of this thread. This is the first essay I have written after taking into consideration the suggestions provided in this thread. I would also be thankful if you could provide an estimated band score based on your experience. I am witing the exam on 24th of July.

Some people say that we can see films on our phones or tablets, there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema.

Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

People have different preferences regarding the modes on which movies can be watched. Some are of the opinion that films can be watched on our phones or tablets instead of cinema halls, while others feel that watching movies in a film hall can be more enjoyable. Although it is sometimes fine to watch movies on a mobile phone, I believe that it can never meet the level of enjoyment that can be achieved in a cinema.

On the one hand, those who prefer to watch films on a phone might argue that it is the most cheapest and convenient means. This may be because they do not have to visit expensive cinema halls and can watch movies wherever they like. For example, people can watch movies while commuting, lying in a bed or even in a bathroom. What they need is just a mobile phone with sufficient charge and a movie downloaded in the phone. As a result, they can watch an entire movie without wasting any money and productive time which does not seem to be possible in cinema halls.

On the other hand, others including myself, believe that movies should be watched in cinema halls because they are specially designed to make film watching experience extremely pleasurable. In other words, cinema halls are often equipped with high-definition massive screen and extra-ordinary sound system, which aids in movie watching experience. These modern technologies and equipment are not available in mobile phones. Therefore, people tend to feel satisfied after watching movies in a multiplex cinema halls as it brings complete value for money.

In conclusion, although watching movies on mobiles and tablets are quite cheap and does not take dedicated time, I do feel that it is not entirely enjoyable. In order to get the most out of the movies, I firmly believe that it should be watched on a big screen with surround sound which is only possible in cinemas.