1. Visitor Visa mandate is that you are not allowed to work on a TRV, so no, she cannot work on VV.
2. SOWP is the only way for her to work, if she gets her TRV approved, apply for SOWP once she's here.
3. Visitor Visa also requires you to prove 'strong ties' to the home country, where you'll return. In your case, you, the spouse, is the strongest tie, and your 9 month old baby, will also be a significant tie, which is also mentioned in your application for TRV. Slim chances of them getting the TRV, but goodluck.
4. Be humble, and respectful. Once you receive a direction, work for finding the answer.
5. Yes the forums are for help, but no one would be willing to help with the attitude you're carrying.
Goodluck on the applications.
