Approved without wedding photographs and or Short Courtship

[Aquarian]

My husband has an interview coming up...I am worried that they will give us a hard time because not only did we have a short courtship before marrying (FYI: I proposed), we chose to elope to neighbouring country (but not because any family member opposed but because I could only stay a few weeks there and we wanted to spend it alone), get married by a notary, and not take wedding photos. We do have many photos of our honeymoon, however.

I met and stayed with his family on second trip (with many photographs with family/friends), shortly after, as planned, and i will be going again next month (which my husband mentioned in his confirmation email for interview attendance).

So my question is, has anybody been successfuly granted visa (without appeal) WITHOUT wedding photographs or had a short courtship?

BTW, we had ordered the notes before they updated them, so only note of significance was:
"No CSCD entered. Photos without info on back. Case will be referred."
And by the time we get next set of notes, it will be 2 weeks after interview...

I am really hoping that is the only reason our case was red-flagged. I know that I did not put any info on any of the pictures of both trips - do not know what I was thinking! However, for photographs that hubby had to take (for visa, etc. I think), we also did not put date on them.

Any help would be appreciated.

 

[CharlieD10]

That your spouse has been selected for an interview means that they have doubts about the admissibility of your spouse. I can't give you any specific references to cases where couple have been approved without wedding photos or had a short courtship, and in any case, these would be of no use to you. At the interview, they won't care about any statistics from past cases, they will care about how your spouse makes your case.

I suggest that in the next few days before the interview, you and your spouse look back at your history as set out in your application, look for the weak areas, and ensure he is prepared to shore them up. Look at yourselves as objectively as you can, and ask yourself why the two of you are together, what would have made you decide this is the person you want to be with for the rest of your lives, what are your significant areas of compatibility/incompatibility and how do you make them work for you as a couple/overcome them?

Don't despair, prepare. My husband and I met online in Feb 2009 and our proposal actually took place over the internet Dec 2009. We met face to face for the first time May 2010, by the end of June 2010, we were married. Most people would call that a really short courtship, and barely living together, so I took pains in my application to explain our thought processes step by step. Since you didn't do this as much as CIC would have liked (hence the interview, is my assumption), you left too much open to question, so your husband must be prepared to explain both your thought processes, how things developed, and why you didn't take any photos of arguably one of the most momentous occasions of your lives.

 

[mikeymyke]

You need to identify your red flags, and figure out how to best respond to them.

Why did you guys get married by a notary and not through a traditional ceremony? Did your parents attend your wedding? If not, why? etc

 

[MadeInCanada]

We were approved with no wedding pictures. And about 6 other red flags. As mentioned, be ready to address the issues. Be confident about who you are and how your relationship decisions have been made to suit you specifically not the general population or what is considered the "norm".

Take Care
MadeInCanada

 

[Aquarian]

Before starting, I do thank ALL of you who have post replies. I always want the true thoughts of people and really appreciate it!. This site/forums have been of great help!

MadeInCanada: thank you for your message!! I had just broke down crying here at work, before, thinking we will be refused because the VO will judge our relation not genuine just because we did not follow the norm and do the "traditional" wedding nor take pictures...I was never big on weddings and I was happy when my husband agreed to elope. We did explain why we did what we did, etc. but it is obviously not enough for them....

I pray and pray that they will see that we do love each other very much...

Thanks again, all, and keep your thoughts coming!

We were approved with no wedding pictures. And about 6 other red flags. As mentioned, be ready to address the issues. Be confident about who you are and how your relationship decisions have been made to suit you specifically not the general population or what is considered the "norm".

Take Care
MadeInCanada

 

[Aquarian]

You are right, because our courtship was so short, we should have explained more in detail of its evolution. Big mistake. At the time, we did not do a lot of research on potential "red flags". I see some other mistakes we have made (did not include personal letters from family/friends, did not take pictures of messages such as Skype, FB, but just copied and pasted into word, etc.).

For the interview, we have gotten another file ready for proof; pictures of many FB and Skype messages and text messages since day 1 of communication, pictures of hubby on Skype, more emails, correspondence by mail, more cellular bills, etc.

Anyway, my husband continues to keep positive and tells me not to worry. However, I feel that often VOs have already made up their minds before the inteview, and that the interview is just to have documentation for reasons for a refusal. I do pray that this interview is really just to give VO a clearer picture of evolution of our relationship and that he is planning on approving him.

That your spouse has been selected for an interview means that they have doubts about the admissibility of your spouse. I can't give you any specific references to cases where couple have been approved without wedding photos or had a short courtship, and in any case, these would be of no use to you. At the interview, they won't care about any statistics from past cases, they will care about how your spouse makes your case.

I suggest that in the next few days before the interview, you and your spouse look back at your history as set out in your application, look for the weak areas, and ensure he is prepared to shore them up. Look at yourselves as objectively as you can, and ask yourself why the two of you are together, what would have made you decide this is the person you want to be with for the rest of your lives, what are your significant areas of compatibility/incompatibility and how do you make them work for you as a couple/overcome them?

Don't despair, prepare. My husband and I met online in Feb 2009 and our proposal actually took place over the internet Dec 2009. We met face to face for the first time May 2010, by the end of June 2010, we were married. Most people would call that a really short courtship, and barely living together, so I took pains in my application to explain our thought processes step by step. Since you didn't do this as much as CIC would have liked (hence the interview, is my assumption), you left too much open to question, so your husband must be prepared to explain both your thought processes, how things developed, and why you didn't take any photos of arguably one of the most momentous occasions of your lives.

 

[Relica]

be sure to bring all the documents you have to the interview!

 

[Aquarian]

We eloped to neighbouring country because it was faster to get married, as I only had a short time (due to restrictions for babysitter available, etc.), and because of the short time (less than 3 weeks), we wanted to spend it alone, thus did not invite family/friends.

You need to identify your red flags, and figure out how to best respond to them.

Why did you guys get married by a notary and not through a traditional ceremony? Did your parents attend your wedding? If not, why? etc

 

[mikeymyke]

I don't understand. You said you went to another country so you guys can be alone, but why not get married in your husband's country (with all family members present), and then go to another country the next day, for your honeymoon and be alone? It doesn't seem to make sense that you want to be alone with him, 100%, even during the wedding day, but you could've just spend 1 day with all of his and your family together on the wedding day, and then spend the rest of the time in another country with your husband. If you had done that, I think that would've saved you a lot of trouble.

 

[Aquarian]

For the first trip, I was supposed to visit him and his family/friends, then marry second trip (three months later), however, because of personal issues, I had more time away for the first trip, so we married then, and I visited his family later. He is from Algeria, and it can apparently take a good month to get married (I had less than 3 weeks), hence much faster in Tunisia. There was no way that we would get married in Algeria, have quality time with his family/friends, and then go on our honeymoon all in the space of less than 3 weeks. Travelling from Algeria to Tunisia is at least 14 hours, and if you know these two countries, there are always risks along the way...(please do not take offence anyone!!). They may have also questioned my hubby as to why we are travelling together, alone, and not married. Even hotels require proof of marriage and we can attest to that, lol...

It was both our first time travelling to another country, so we did what we thought was best, considering we did not have a lot of time to plan.

And who are you to judge that it does "not make sense" to want to be alone for our wedding? 9 months later, we have no regrets on how we chose to marry. Our families thought it made sense and we are grateful for that.

They are looking forward to seeing me again when I visit next month.......Ahhh, such beautiful people, really. I love my Kabylie/berber husband....

I don't understand. You said you went to another country so you guys can be alone, but why not get married in your husband's country (with all family members present), and then go to another country the next day, for your honeymoon and be alone? It doesn't seem to make sense that you want to be alone with him, 100%, even during the wedding day, but you could've just spend 1 day with all of his and your family together on the wedding day, and then spend the rest of the time in another country with your husband. If you had done that, I think that would've saved you a lot of trouble.

 

[Aquarian]

As for getting married through a notary, we kept it neutral as I am catholic and he is muslim. No religious aspect involved was best-suited for both of us.

We eloped to neighbouring country because it was faster to get married, as I only had a short time (due to restrictions for babysitter available, etc.), and because of the short time (less than 3 weeks), we wanted to spend it alone, thus did not invite family/friends.

 

[on-hold]

I don't understand. You said you went to another country so you guys can be alone, but why not get married in your husband's country (with all family members present), and then go to another country the next day, for your honeymoon and be alone? It doesn't seem to make sense that you want to be alone with him, 100%, even during the wedding day, but you could've just spend 1 day with all of his and your family together on the wedding day, and then spend the rest of the time in another country with your husband. If you had done that, I think that would've saved you a lot of trouble.

I understand -- not everyone wants a wedding with all family members present. I didn't. The OP's entire point is that she doesn't feel that her marriage should be judged by whether it follows some social norm, and she's right. The way that CIC judges 'proper' relationships is very conservative, and I don't have a solution to it, but it does try to impose a large amount of conformity on the wedding.

 

[Aquarian]

Exactly, thank you for your input. I understand that our government wants to protect us, I get it, and I thank them for it. But the government also chooses when to be conservative and when not to be, at their convenience.

Regardless, it is remains unfortunate that the genuineness of our relationship is further judged because we did not follow the "traditional" way of marrying....

I understand -- not everyone wants a wedding with all family members present. I didn't. The OP's entire point is that she doesn't feel that her marriage should be judged by whether it follows some social norm, and she's right. The way that CIC judges 'proper' relationships is very conservative, and I don't have a solution to it, but it does try to impose a large amount of conformity on the wedding.

 

[lalana]

I have similar case with Aquarian, we met over the internet, short courtship, we married in Tunis ( beautiful country to have a honeymoon) my husband is from Algeria ( it takes 3 months to get married in Algeria, not 1 month, and the foreign spouse has to be interview by police or alike). My husband's interview will be a day after Aquarian’s husband. Of course I appreciate all the comments, suggestions given to Aquarian, I'll taken mine too. Before I sent the application to CIC, it was checked by UBC- Legal Aid, and I just put some sticky notes in the main pictures. I think CIC is calling for interview on our husbands because we don't follow Canadian social norm, by the way I'm originally from Guatemala, and I reverted to Islam before I met my husband. I just trust in God everything is going to be all right for aquarian & husband and me and my husband, I wish all the best for all those that in good faith have a genuine relationship and have found a hardship process. God blessed you and pray for us.

 

[jamali]

Exactly, thank you for your input. I understand that our government wants to protect us, I get it, and I thank them for it. But the government also chooses when to be conservative and when not to be, at their convenience.

Regardless, it is remains unfortunate that the genuineness of our relationship is further judged because we did not follow the "traditional" way of marrying....

i can understand what you mean because it is unfortunate that we have to prove our relationship are genuine... you did what you and your husband thought was right for you as a couple and of course at that time what is important is that you're marrying the man you love ... i know for me, i was not thinking about doing things (wedding ceremony 8)) only because it was for the benefit of the application

i'm sure your husband will do great ... good luck for the interview