sounds good! I think you just need to provide evidence that you have strong ties to your country. Like a current job, properties, etc.
Your SOP seems quite different from mine since, mine is direct to the point, in bullet form and precise (I didn't really went so much into the specifics- just my career goal and purpose of studying in canada), but I think that will do as well, because it sounds honest
If you can include more about:
>WHY YOU HAVE TO COME BACK to the Philippines?
>WHY DID YOU CHOOSE TO STUDY IN CANADA AND not in any other countries?
>Why did you pick that specific school?
>How can this course help in improving your career in the PHilippines (i think this one is pretty much covered by your SOP)?
then that would be cool
and of course always provide supporting documents to back up your statement
Good luck!