Adjustment Issues - Making Friends, Building your own life

[CharlizeRai]

Hello,

I'm sending this out to anyone who has any suggestions regarding adjusting to life in Canada. My hubby recently landed, and we are living here in Edmonton. He is attending school full-time for his English, and he is not working yet.

He has been voicing to me that part of what is really hard for him to adjust (aside from changing everything), is the lack of friends he has here compared to home. In fact, the only friends he knows are my friends, and I think he wants some of his own friends to grab a beer with sometimes, etc.

Does anyone have any suggestions to make this process smoother. I am trying to connect him with as many of my friends as possible, but I am not in touch at all with the Romanian Community here, so the language barrier is a bit of a problem sometimes.

AGH. I can only imagine how difficult it is. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

 

[SenoritaBella]

One of the best ways to make friends is through shared common interests. As he is taking classes for English, he could make friends with other students(and immigrants) in the class. Perhaps he could start by having conversations and then inviting one or two for coffee, then beer and after getting to know them more and if he feels comfortable, he could invite them to your home for a meal. The idea is to invite them to events and hopefully they will do same in turn, etc. The good thing is here people pay for themselves when they go.
Also, attend multi-cultural festivals or Romanian events and invite these new friends to the events. Over time his network should increase and he'll meet more people. Volunteering is also another good way to make friends and meet new people.

 

[slavasz]

I would recommend not seek to much into your ethnic community because he will not be able to improve his English and therefore improve his chances of finding friends outside that ethnic community.

 

[EmploymentOppty]

Try "community->friendship, networking" section of Kijiji. Lots of buddies are looking to talk, hang out and simply know each other.

 

[CharlizeRai]

Thanks everyone! I will start looking into these options

 

[DGT]

You're not alone! Even my wife and I (she's Canadian, I'm Scottish) are struggling to make friends etc. The internet is a useful tool, and if he's got any sports he likes to play, he could look up some local teams to become involved with? I've started playing 5-a-side football (Soccer) and it's helping get me out of my shell a bit as I tend to build my social life around my workaholic lifestyle (which I don't have anymore since I'm not working!).

 

[parker24]

My husband had such a hard time making friends. I'm the outgoing one, he's more shy. But he doesn't mind not having many friends, he's perfectly content to stay in and be a homebody haha.

The thing is, I wanted to be able to go out with friends and I wanted him to have friends and have a boys night. Granted, my husband spoke English (he's American) but he was still shy. He attended church with me, made a few friends. He went to the gym with me, made a friend there. And then when he started work, he already has a best buddy (been there for 2 months now). Once your husband starts work, he will build up some friendships Maybe see if there's a ball hockey team somewhere or a sport he likes. I tried to get my husband into ball hockey but he would rather watch it :