IELTS - Writing - For Band 7 or Above.
- Thread starter H0peAndFa1th
- Start date
Is it ok to add a suggestion in the conclusion? Will it not be adding a new point/ideavery good, especially the last sentence,
delicious
excellent
your ideas are fully developed in first paras, sentence structure is great, everything is great
that one red line, is repeat, adds no value to essay, so instead of that, you could use suggestion
Like
Governments must provide incentives to industries to setup their plants/units in remote area, and better regulation policy must be adopted to make the farm businesses more profitable, which can keep the balance of workforce, etc etc, u know the rest.
this would close the essay with a message, a solution, a whole idea, make the reader feel full.
but still, it is 7.5 to 8 -- yup no kidding, it is.
I have heard
Fantastic progress man
But still work on your plurals..you keep forgetting to add 's'
I have the same concern, as the question does not ask for any solution.
How about this one?
In many countries, people are moving away from rural areas and towards urban areas.
Why do you think that is?
What problems can this cause?
Intro:
During the past few decades an overwhelming number of people worldwide tend to move from the country to cities. In my opinion, one of the main factors for this phenomena is the lack of job opportunities outside urban areas. This, on its turn, can lead to such a negative consequence, as food supply crisis.
Conclusion:
To conclude, the recent tendency of those living in smaller communities to move to the cities is mainly caused by a smaller number of job opportunities locally. With this regards, there is a potential threat that the amounts of food supplied to the population can decrease dramatically.
@Kashif ahmed @H0peAndFa1th
Avoid this phrase. Point 2.6 on my post here https://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/threads/ielts-writing-for-band-7-or-above.540392/page-90#post-7568485
And similar version is point 8 in this list by Liz here http://ieltsliz.com/ielts-writing-tips-sentences-to-avoid/
Also, many suggest to use only "in conclusion" and "to conclude" for conclusion. I guess no need to be super creative on that one, just to be on the safe side.
It is also suggested to have a simple topic sentence at the beginning of the paragraph (just to present the main idea) and explain it further in the next sentences. Not sure if that's mandatory though.
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A topic sentence is necessary I feel
Also helps in reaching word count !
How do you feel about using ''''although' for discussion essays introduction
For example:
Although some think like this but some others like that...
It helps in making a complex sentence
Also helps in reaching word count !
How do you feel about using ''''although' for discussion essays introduction
For example:
Although some think like this but some others like that...
It helps in making a complex sentence
I was so frustrated at ielts examiners, I am sure you can feel my frustration,
read my analogies and rants carefully, people suffered there.
I scattered lots of gems along the way, collect them, they will surely pay you the rewards.
True that and i am taking all the learning or where else this improvement is coming from..
Thanks
Could you please evaluate?
More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list.
What are the reasons for this?
What can be done to solve the problem?
It has been reported recently that the number of endangered animal species or those under the risk of extinction is increasing every year. It is believed that one of the main reasons for this tendency is the climate change. This issue can be fixed (can I say so, or should be "overcome" instead?) if people start acting more consciously towards the environment.
The constantly growing number of endangered wildlife representatives is thought to be caused by climate change. For thousands of years the Earth’s fauna would continue its existence and development under certain weather conditions: some species have adapted to hot and dry weather, while others prefer mild and humid climate. Consequently, any change in the average temperatures or air humidity can potentially jeopardy the comfort or even the existence of wild animals. A recent article published by National Geographic illustrates it how the change in the temperature by two Celsius degrees can threaten the existence of hundreds of wild species.
In order to solve the above-mentioned issue some experts suggest people to behave more environmentally friendly. Climate change is considered to mainly take place due to air pollution, as a result of human activity. From this perspective, a limitation in burnt fossil fuel and other pollutants can result in maintaining current climate conditions and enabling animals vulnerable to weather changes survive. As reported by the United Nations in August 2018, pollution of the environment by the population is the main reason of temperature changes globally.
To conclude, an overwhelming number of species has been noticed to either die out or become endangered because of volatile weather conditions on the Earth. To tackle this issue, people should start taking steps towards a more sustainable life.
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"Change" used 7 times!!! Didn’t have time to replace, would I lose scores at the exam for that?
More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list.
What are the reasons for this?
What can be done to solve the problem?
It has been reported recently that the number of endangered animal species or those under the risk of extinction is increasing every year. It is believed that one of the main reasons for this tendency is the climate change. This issue can be fixed (can I say so, or should be "overcome" instead?) if people start acting more consciously towards the environment.
The constantly growing number of endangered wildlife representatives is thought to be caused by climate change. For thousands of years the Earth’s fauna would continue its existence and development under certain weather conditions: some species have adapted to hot and dry weather, while others prefer mild and humid climate. Consequently, any change in the average temperatures or air humidity can potentially jeopardy the comfort or even the existence of wild animals. A recent article published by National Geographic illustrates it how the change in the temperature by two Celsius degrees can threaten the existence of hundreds of wild species.
In order to solve the above-mentioned issue some experts suggest people to behave more environmentally friendly. Climate change is considered to mainly take place due to air pollution, as a result of human activity. From this perspective, a limitation in burnt fossil fuel and other pollutants can result in maintaining current climate conditions and enabling animals vulnerable to weather changes survive. As reported by the United Nations in August 2018, pollution of the environment by the population is the main reason of temperature changes globally.
To conclude, an overwhelming number of species has been noticed to either die out or become endangered because of volatile weather conditions on the Earth. To tackle this issue, people should start taking steps towards a more sustainable life.
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"Change" used 7 times!!! Didn’t have time to replace, would I lose scores at the exam for that?
Yes I would also suggest to keep it simple for conclusion. You don’t want any confusion that you wrote a conclusion paragraph.
The second thing as you said is not mandatory but helps if you’re not an advanced level writer. Just keeps things simple.
From what I have seen by reviewing numerous essay on this forum is that people come here since they can’t get to 7 and are stuck at 6.5 but secretly in their head they actually want to score a 8/8.5 because it is tough to accept that a stupid test is telling them they can’t write English. And hence keep writing “complex” stuff. At the end of the day IELTS is an exam and the examiners are trained to look at an essay in a certain way. So, if your target is a 7 then try to just keep things simple. Do not try too many things unless you really need an 8+ score.
If you read my very initial reviews on this forum I used to give feedback on vocab etc but then I realised that is not very important. It is very difficult to improve vocab in shor period of time so that feedback doesn’t really help. When I started giving feedback on just the structure of essay and forced people to avoid very common mistakes many of the candidates did score 7.
So, if your goal is 7 then read my long post again on common mistakes and avoid those. If you want to score an 8+ this thread possibly can’t help you.
