Well to answer your question bluntly, I wasn't "trying to find a suitable match". I wasn't trying to find love by any means, if anything, at the time, I felt like running and screaming in the opposite direction of love, haha. But I changed my tune pretty quickly, and love sort of just, effortlessly and blessedly happened...
Our story began on an island, in an old stone temple. There were six people in our group of explorers and adventurers, and this adorable lady who would one day be my wife was one of them. We had been given a mission to track down a Pirate King for a great bounty and a chance to acquire 5 million coins; I could use those coins, proper armor isn't cheap these days, you know? There were pirates everywhere! With bulging muscles, curved swords and deadly intent, arrrrrghhh! My wife fought well, even in high heels. We talked a little a long the way as we pushed through swarms of cut throats, our eyes meeting many times as she cast healing spells and summoned beasts to fight along side us as I swung around my magic endowed sword.
lol, it was an online game, and as the days went by, we kept on playing together, and talking, and talking. And more talking. Soon we were talking on Skype and msn. Our chats turned into voice calls that lasted hours. We would watch movies together. Sometimes eat together. We would fall asleep together, "goodnight I love you" and wake up together, or wake the other up by accident because there was a difference in time zone, "I missed you! how did you sleep? How are you? I want to be with you" and other such unsightly mushy words were muttered. She convinced me to get a web cam, I was horribly shy, I mean horribly shy at first; when I was little my dad once went on vacation and when he got back I ran away from him because I was too shy to meet him again. If my parents had guests that wanted to see me I would hide under the bed until they were gone, even if it meant hours. One time they were bringing guests up to my bedroom to meet me, I heard them coming up the stairs and I jumped out the window to save myself this social incursion. And it was a two storey house. Boy, was I shy. But I overcame this anxiety because she was so adamant and so sure of everything, as if she were from the future and knew we were meant to be. She was so confident in us that over time I became confident too. Satre once said, It’s quite an undertaking to start loving somebody. You have to have energy, generosity, blindness. There is even a moment right at the start where you have to jump across an abyss: if you think about it you don’t do it.
I was really scared at first because of bad experiences. I was in bad health too having just gotten done going in and out of the hospital. I was in no shape or form emotionally or physically to jump across any abyss. But with her there was no abyss, it was as if her arms were wide open and she was just a step away waiting for me: hurry up you silly man, what are you waiting for? And if she was afraid, she never let on. She just seemed so amazed and appreciative that I loved her and somehow that made me love her even more. She literally would say "thank you for loving me" and it melted my heart so thoroughly, somehow. As if I was doing her a favor, but of course I wasn't, of course I loved her! She was easier to love than homemade apple pie. And so we met almost two years later. There were no nerves at the airport, it felt breezy and light and dreamlike, as though we had known each other always. As though she had simply stepped out of my computer screen and was now life sized and available for hugs. Almost a year after that we got married, and I spend my days thankful that she does me the favor of loving me.
We have a daughter now who is only a few months old but a beautiful and already hilarious little girl that makes us laugh so much. And I miss them both too much and our package was just sent out the other week. To use your words it sometimes does feel like a "wretched process" and I'm awake some nights thinking, and thinking and thinking...I can work myself up with so much worry I almost feel like I want to throw up. But I wouldn't have traded any of it in for a 'local', haha. My wife is my best friend. I can't let a few lines on a map keep me from her.
Sorry for the cheesiness. The end.
))
