Suffered spousal abuse, and now feeling lost.

[Jnicole45]

I was aware of her responsibility to me financially, and I did talk about this with the community health counselor I spoke to. I was afraid that if I stayed in Canada and did get social assistance, it would only result in her frequently contacting me and harassing me... or escalate to worse.

On the contrary, I was afraid that if I stayed in Canada on social assistance, and CIC contacted her about paying the bill... she would use that as "reason" to start false rape or abuse allegations, and get me arrested.

I really don't trust her to be reasonable, in any sense of the word, and wouldn't put it past her to do those things. This was a large factor in leaving Canada. Because I did not want it to escalate to Restraining Orders, or showing up at my new apartment, trying to intimidate me to leave. I had to just get far far away, as quickly as possible.

Totally understand all of that, distance (physical or otherwise) it clearly your best option with this woman at the moment. I meant more along the lines of, once you have a lawyer (and all your communication goes through them), if you were to move back to Canada even just for the duration of the legal battle that might ensue, your lawyer could use that as a way to get something from her. Not ideal, especially given how unstable she is, but at least with lawyers involved there's an extra layer of protection if she tries to harass you.

Regardless, I'm sorry you're in this situation, and I hope youre able to get out of it as smoothly and as quickly as possible.

 

[username2300]

Totally understand all of that, distance (physical or otherwise) it clearly your best option with this woman at the moment. I meant more along the lines of, once you have a lawyer (and all your communication goes through them), if you were to move back to Canada even just for the duration of the legal battle that might ensue, your lawyer could use that as a way to get something from her. Not ideal, especially given how unstable she is, but at least with lawyers involved there's an extra layer of protection if she tries to harass you.

Regardless, I'm sorry you're in this situation, and I hope youre able to get out of it as smoothly and as quickly as possible.

Ah, I see what you mean. That makes a lot of sense.

Though I still don't know how I am gonna afford a lawyer. I'm broke, working class, and only have a couple hundred dollars to spare. My wife's new boyfriend has a parent who is a major company CEO, and lives in an expensive condo. So I'm sure that his family has very powerful lawyer connections on call for all sorts of occasions.

 

[Sarahannclarke5]

Divorce is not as expensive as you think.
In hamilton, it costs a total of $480. You pay a $10 filing fee, then you pay some when you do the next part, and the remaining balance at the last step. You have to be separated a year before divorce is granted, although you can begin any time. Also, i know most cities have something called a "fee waiver" that helps low income people get a divorce at low or no cost. I know Hamilton does and you only pay the filing fee of $10.

https://www.attorneygeneral.jus.gov.on.ca/english/courts/feewaiver/index.php#toc001
That link may help

Go to the courthouse and speak to a clerk.

 

[GodSend]

Divorce is not as expensive as you think.
In hamilton, it costs a total of $480. You pay a $10 filing fee, then you pay some when you do the next part, and the remaining balance at the last step. You have to be separated a year before divorce is granted, although you can begin any time. Also, i know most cities have something called a "fee waiver" that helps low income people get a divorce at low or no cost. I know Hamilton does and you only pay the filing fee of $10.

https://www.attorneygeneral.jus.gov.on.ca/english/courts/feewaiver/index.php#toc001
That link may help

Go to the courthouse and speak to a clerk.

Correct, however its really best if you have a separation agreement (signed). Because of the hostility of the situation it could be as simple as a one page letter agreeing that all assets (financial and otherwise) will remain as they are at this point, that no alimony is going to be paid. Basically keep it simple, get it signed and GTFO of that situation.

Now if you want to get your money back, split your assets, or want alimony then you will need a lawyer. Nasty divorces can get expensive..civil ones (like mine was) are a lot less....