~*Dani*~ said:
I have freedom of speech, that I can say anything I want of my mind and my feelings. I am really hurt and upset by this. I felt like dying inside, really.
I still can't believe it and don't understand this. I am young than you. I am 29 and my husband is 22( only 7 age difference, not too much!)
our life is in Visa officer's hand.. we already planned the future in Saskatoon as a family,have jobs, so on. our marriage is purely genuine, period. we live together, see each other day, sleep in same bed. I so felt that it is totally over and ruined it.
how I start the process of appeal the decision? how?! how much it cost? do I have to be there for ADR appeal?
Hi Dani! I am back for a few minutes as this is my lunch break. I know you are really hurt and upset. How cannot it be? This visa office is awful! I still cannot believe they refused you! You had no red flags, no? Is there something you did not say in order to understand this refusal? What is your story? How long have you been married or known each other? Is the little girl from your current husband? What did your husband talk about at the interview? Do you know why they don't believe your marriage is genuine? You have to order the notes!!! They contain all the data during the process of your application plus the notes taken during the interview and the reasons why the VO denied you the visa.
I understand you feel it is totally over. I felt the same way. I was in a worst position than you as I was 48 at the time my husband was denied visa. When you receive such a blow like this close to 50 years old, you just feel like giving up and you feel it is not worth the battle. I would have given anything to be as young as you! Your life is not over, it is just ON HOLD. For a couple of months, you will go through feelings of depression, then eventually you will snap out of it. Cry and yell, don't keep it inside. I don't know how is your husband right now and how he reacts to the whole thing. I got it hard as my husband shut down. I felt utterly alone during this ordeal. I felt that something died in me. Believe me... you will come back to life! A new you will emerge.
As I said before, don't let ONE person to determine the course of your future. And if you kill yourself, you will break three people's heart: your little girl, your husband and your mother, just because your heart is broken. Is it worth it? NO! What is best? To go through this nightmare for some months or be separated forever from your husband? Look... you are lucky to be in Saskatchewan. If you were in Toronto, for example, do you know the waiting time to get an appeal date is 18 months? In less than 6 months we got full hearing.
There are two possibilities. Once you fill out the notice of appeal, the board will decide if you qualify for ADR or full hearing. If it is ADR, it is you alone. If it is full hearing, it is you in person and your husband on the phone. The cost of an immigration consultant is $3000. You can do monthly payments like I did. Usually people win the appeal.
So, for some months you won't be with your husband. You know what I did to keep my sanity afloat? I set little goals, one for each month. Keep busy! Time flies fast when you are busy. So, if you set little goals and you achieve them one by one, you will have a feeling of pride and accomplishment. It will help you develop your strength as the hearing or ADR is tough, quite tough! It is like going into the arena with lions ready to reduce you to pieces.
You will receive a copy of the refusal letter along with a notice of appeal. The first step is to order the notes, then the second step is to send this notice of appeal to let them know you want to fight this. Take care of yourself and don't look too far ahead, one day at a time! I am here to assist you in any way I can. You can also read all my past posts and there is this thread where you can find valuable information:
http://www.canadavisa.com/canada-immigration-discussion-board/all-spouse-appeal-cases-come-here-and-join-us-plz-t87619.375.html
