Scared

[The Scared]

Hi please somebody advise me i arrived in Canada 20 months ago my wife sponsored me the thing is she has changed since there shes not the woman i fell in love with i have been doing everything to make it work nd make her happy but shes so controling nd demanding i talked to her so many times but shes never changed shes really giving me so much stress now . i left everything behind and came in a country that i knew no1 besieds her nd started a new life from 0 so i could be with her i think me not being rich is bothering her shes asking for kids nd buying a house nd the thing is i can`t afford to have none of them for now im a hardworking family guy but nothing seems to make her happy now that i started my life in here have job nd new friends i wanna divorce her because i can`t take this anymore fighting every day it is killing me but i dont wanna lose my permanent resident im a tax payer nd never did anything wrng in my life is there a way i could lose my pr . sppecial thanks to all of you

 

[Sweden]

Hi please somebody advise me i arrived in Canada 20 months ago my wife sponsored me the thing is she has changed since there shes not the woman i fell in love with i have been doing everything to make it work nd make her happy but shes so controling nd demanding i talked to her so many times but shes never changed shes really giving me so much stress now . i left everything behind and came in a country that i knew no1 besieds her nd started a new life from 0 so i could be with her i think me not being rich is bothering her shes asking for kids nd buying a house nd the thing is i can`t afford to have none of them for now im a hardworking family guy but nothing seems to make her happy now that i started my life in here have job nd new friends i wanna divorce her because i can`t take this anymore fighting every day it is killing me but i dont wanna lose my permanent resident im a tax payer nd never did anything wrng in my life is there a way i could lose my pr . sppecial thanks to all of you

Hey,

Sorry to hear that things are not going well and it's hard on you. Hope things get better soon.
If you were sponsored by your wife and landed as a Permanent resident, you can choose to divorce (I am not pushing you just stating your options) and you will not loose your PR. If your wife threatens to take away your PR, just know that she doesn't have that power.
Good luck,
Sweden

 

[R151NG5UN]

Sorry to hear your story, adapting to a whole new life in a new country is scary and I do hope you and your wife can work through your differences and live the dream you both wanted when going through the family class application.

You can't have your PR revoked, if you do decide that your marriage isn't working. Always a sad story to see any failed marriage. Be strong and hope everything works out for the both of you.

 

[truesmile]

You are eager to leave I am sure. Anyway, now that you have your PR card they cannot take it away from you simply because you get separated. That "new" rule only came in a month ago and does NOT apply to you. Perhaps, graciously ask her to chill out (if you haven't already) and if she doesn't, your gonna leave!

 

[Shiny88]

I would say for you both to go for marriage councilling. Remember those days you were far away from each other and were so eager to be togheter and all, and remember what made you marry her and vice versa. Theres always a way to work things out. The most important thing in a relationship after trust is comunication, tell your wife to use her common sense and that everything takes time. Stop worrying about your pr but worry about how to work your marriage.Now that u r pr i understand its easy to find wrong on your wife than when u werent. If u came only for her then why dont u leave andd go back where u came from. Anyways i dont want to be mean i dont really know whats going on with your life,but am sure theres some wrong thing u are doing too to your wife. Best advice is marriage counceling .goodluck

 

[gsize]

you need to leave this situation. The stres will engulf you. you will become part of the 60% of straight couples who divorce. As the posters have said.....you will not be removed from Canada.

 

[lunas]

Stop worrying about your pr but worry about how to work your marriage.Now that u r pr i understand its easy to find wrong on your wife than when u werent. If u came only for her then why dont u leave andd go back where u came from. Anyways i dont want to be mean i dont really know whats going on with your life,but am sure theres some wrong thing u are doing too to your wife. Best advice is marriage counceling .goodluck

I'm sorry I agree with Shiny.

 

[MSP2YYZ]

I agree with shiny and lunas. Definitely try marriage therapy first, it can help you both to solve a lot of issues. Immigration is a big change, but if you both truly love each other, you can make it work. There is absolutely nothing your wife can do to take away your pr, so stop worrying about that right away.

 

[Shiny88]

you need to leave this situation. The stres will engulf you. you will become part of the 60% of straight couples who divorce. As the posters have said.....you will not be removed from Canada.

I am surprised that you advise him to leave his wife instead of making it work, these days marriage has no meaning to most people and its very sad. Couples of years ago people used to stick to their marriage for lifetime now with simplest issues people think about divorce. by the way HOW many divorce in your grandparents or greatgrand parents side?i bet none. Nobody said marriage would be easy theres ups and downs not only in marriage but friendship,parents ,siblings.. So the way to solve problems its not to avoid and runaway from it but to face it and make it work. That guy said ''now he has job and new friends'' so now its time to get rid of my wife because blah blah........ Someone who has intension to leave their partner anything is a good reason to leave. AnywAY i would love to hear from his wife side aswell.

 

[gsize]

I am surprised that you advise him to leave his wife instead of making it work, these days marriage has no meaning to most people and its very sad. Couples of years ago people used to stick to their marriage for lifetime now with simplest issues people think about divorce. Nobody said marriage would be easy theres ups and downs not only in marriage but friendship,parents ,siblings.. So the way to solve problems its not to avoid and runaway from it but to face it and make it work. That guy said ''now he has job and new friends'' so now its time to get rid of my wife because blah blah........ Someone who has intension to leave their partner anything is a good reason to leave. AnywAY

In theory, I agree with you. Of course its best to work it out (if possible) Based on his short post, it sounds like the wife is not interested and just wants him out. (maybe she has another man or woman)

Life is precious and short. I say, give it a shot but be prepared to walk away from her.

 

[scos]

gsize, you have it backwards. She wants to start a family and all that and HE wants out.

 

[lunas]

That's what I get from the little info he gave too. I think they need a mediator to help them communicate. We -women- are very different than men. There is a time (not for everybody) when we'll want to start a family, hence a house or a place to raise them. It's not everybody's choice but I hope that's something they talked about before getting married and going through the sponsoring process. The wait is long and stressful enough.

 

[Shiny88]

In theory, I agree with you. Of course its best to work it out (if possible) Based on his short post, it sounds like the wife is not interested and just wants him out. (maybe she has another man or woman)

Life is precious and short. I say, give it a shot but be prepared to walk away from her.

If his wife really wanted to get rid of him he wouldnt be posting here but already be in the divorce process.He didnt say that his WIFE IS TREATHENING HIM to take away his PR, its his own fear!""now that i started my life in here have job nd new friends i wanna divorce her""<-- to me it sounds like he has every reason in the world to leave her because he is settled in canada and now can look for some other woman to spend his life with also that he is a PR life is better! I BET HE IS just writing in this forum to make sure he is not gonna loose his PR . Life is precious and i admit that, i admit we should live our life ,our day as if it was our last but if using someone can bring you hapiness then wait for karma to bite ur B*TT. Again i really dont know this mans personal life maybe that woman he is with is really a witch but i wont judge without hearing from the otherside. When you hear from one side it seems like the opposite person is the devil but when you hear the other side then you can judge and see who is making things worst... ahhh am out.

 

[Shiny88]

That's what I get from the little info he gave too. I think they need a mediator to help them communicate. We -women- are very different than men. There is a time (not for everybody) when we'll want to start a family, hence a house or a place to raise them. It's not everybody's choice but I hope that's something they talked about before getting married and going through the sponsoring process. The wait is long and stressful enough.

True say, God know for how long they knew each other but theres a time in life a woman need and want to have a family. I myself didnt want to have child until i am settled with my husband i n canada, my husband was dying to have a baby, now that i am by accident am happy to be and also i made ONE man really happy. And guess what my hubby is still not here in canada with me. So theres always a way to work things out, and compromise between eachother.

 

[lunas]

True say, God know for how long they knew each other but theres a time in life a woman need and want to have a family. I myself didnt want to have child until i am settled with my husband i n canada, my husband was dying to have a baby, now that i am by accident am happy to be and also i made ONE man really happy. And guess what my hubby is still not here in canada with me. So theres always a way to work things out, and compromise between eachother.

Congratulations! I'm sorry things didn't work out as the initial plan but you are both happy. We are planning to wait until I'm moved in wiht my hubby but we are also aware that my time is running out and we might need to give up on kids.