I find CIC's discussion on characteristics and assessment of conjugal relationships in OP-2 really helpful (and inspirational) as a starting point for these discussions:
"In the M. v. H. decision, the Supreme Court adopts the list of factors that must be considered in
determining whether any two individuals are actually in a conjugal relationship from the decision of
the Ontario Court of Appeal in Moldowich v. Penttinen. They include:
• shared shelter (e.g., sleeping arrangements);
• sexual and personal behaviour (e.g., fidelity, commitment, feelings towards each other);
• services (e.g., conduct and habit with respect to the sharing of household chores)
• social activities (e.g., their attitude and conduct as a couple in the community and with their
families);
• economic support (e.g., financial arrangements, ownership of property);
• children (e.g., attitude and conduct concerning children)
• the societal perception of the two as a couple."
"Based on this, the following characteristics should be present to some degree in all conjugal
relationships, married and unmarried:
• mutual commitment to a shared life;
• exclusive – cannot be in more than one conjugal relationship at a time;
• intimate – commitment to sexual exclusivity;
• interdependent – physically, emotionally, financially, socially;
• permanent – long-term, genuine and continuing relationship;
• present themselves as a couple;
• regarded by others as a couple;
• caring for children (if there are children).
People who are dating or who are thinking about marrying or living together and establishing a
common-law relationship are NOT yet in a conjugal relationship, nor are people who want to live
together to “try out” their relationship.
Persons in a conjugal relationship have made a significant commitment to one another."
and then outlines examples of evidence:
"Financial aspects of the relationship
• Joint loan agreements for real estate, cars, major household
appliances;
• Joint ownership of property, other durable goods;
• Operation of joint bank accounts, joint credit cards evidence that any
such accounts have existed for a reasonable period of time;
• The extent of any pooling of financial resources, especially in relation
to major financial commitments;
• Whether one party owes any legal obligation in respect of the other.
Social aspects of the relationship
• Evidence that the relationship has been declared to government
bodies and commercial or public institutions or authorities and
acceptance of such declarations by any such bodies;
• Joint membership in organisations or groups, joint participation in
sporting, cultural, social or other activities;
• Joint travel;
• Shared values with respect to how a household should be managed;
• Shared responsibility for children; shared values with respect to
child-rearing; willingness to care for the partner's children;
• Testimonials by parents, family members, relatives or friends and
other interested parties about the nature of the relationship and
whether the couple present themselves to others as partners.
Statements in the form of statutory declarations are preferred.
Physical and emotional aspects of the relationship -the degree of commitment as evidenced by:
• Knowledge of each other's personal circumstances, background and
family situation;
• Shared values and interests;
• Expressed intention that the relationship will be long term;
• The extent to which the parties have combined their affairs, for
example, are they beneficiaries of one another's insurance plans,
pensions, etc.?
• Joint decision-making with consequences for one partner affecting
the other;
• Support for each other when ill and on special occasions letters,
cards, gifts, time off work to care for other;
The terms of the parties' wills made out in each other's favour
provide some evidence of an intention that the relationship is long
term and permanent;
• Time spent together;
• Time spent with one another's families;
• Regular and continuous communication when apart.
Examples of supporting documents:
• Family memberships, medical plans, documentation from institutions that provides
recognition as a couple;
• Marriage certificate (not just a solemnization record), wedding invitations, commitment
ceremony (certificate, invitations), domestic partnership certificate;
• joint ownership of possessions, joint utility bills, lease/rental agreement, joint mortgage/loan,
property title, joint bank statements; money transfers.
• documents showing travel together, long distance phone bills; other proof of continuous
communication (emails, internet chat site printouts, letters).
• insurance policies (documents naming the partner as a beneficiary), wills, powers of
attorney;
• significant photographs;
• statements of support from families, bank manager, employers, financial professionals,
religious leaders, community leaders, professors, teachers or medical professionals."
You can see even more details at http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/resources/manuals/op/op02-eng.pdf in Sections 5.25 and 5.26
