Please Check my SOP for Canadian Student Visa and Make Some correction if needed

[Muzammal Farooq]

SUBMISSION

It is respectfully submitted that I have been granted admission in Selkirk College International (DLI # 019360990072), Castlegar, British Columbia, Canada in the field of Business Administration at Post Graduate level. My classes are scheduled to commence from May 2, 2018. In fact, I applied for a study permit on Oct 31, 2017 (Application # S301906691, UCI # 1105991433). However, to my surprise, my application for a Study Permit was refused by the High Commission of Canada’s letter dated Nov 20, 2017, which read Quote “You have not satisfied me that you would leave Canada at the end of your stay. In reaching this decision, I considered several factors including the purpose of visit.”

Other reason “Upon a complete review of the application, previous academic and employment history and reasonableness of undertaking the proposed studies in Canada, I am not satisfied you are a bona fide student & would depart Canada at the end of authorized stay”.

In this connection, I would like to address the concerns raised in the above-mentioned letter as follows:


STATEMENT of PURPOSE:

I have done MSc Chemistry and working in OLFRESH (PVT) Limited, Pakistan. The postgraduate program in which I have to get enrolled is an important leader of my success to reach a Managerial Position in the Corporate organization in Pakistan. Science graduation accompanied with Business Studies is quite demanding for Corporate set up as it is a professional course that will develop all the skills which are necessary for the corporate world. This course is perfect for me as it consists of managerial, administrative and presentational skills. My intensive previous work experience in corporate organizations makes this program more meaningful as I will be able to understand the academic material better by using my work experience as a reference point. I am quite confident that after completion of the study in Canada in the field of Business Administration, I will be more successful running my job in the field. It will also enable me to spread my personal business also for which I have great dreams.

The reason for selecting CANADA as my study destination is because CANADA is offering quality and state of the art education. Many people have joined in different organizations in Pakistan after completion of Business Studies from Canadian Institutes. My aim is not only to learn by attending an institution but also to learn from, and CANADA is a country which ensures for international students.
I wish to inform you that I do not have any intention whatsoever to overstay in Canada. After completion of my study in Canada, I plan to return to my home country where there a great potential and many opportunities for people having foreign education in my chosen field. You will appreciate that I am the beloved member of my family. My Mother wants me to further strengthen my knowledge on more modern lines after completion of the study in Canada. Further, I am leaving behind my Mother, beloved Wife and a little Child in addition to many other close relatives. Therefore, I would not like to be separated from my nucleus family in Pakistan, by deciding to overstay in Canada.

Further, I have a well-established side business in Marketing and am earning a handsome amount of money every month (in excess of C$4000). Hence, I do not have any economic or social problems in Pakistan to look for residence abroad.

MY FINANCIAL STATUS:

As I have been working as Visiting Real Estate Advisor and you will see the contents of my own bank statement, I have a current balance of Pakistani rupees 40,000,00 (Equivalent to Canadian $45454.54 approx. Calculated at current exchange rate of Rs. 88.0 per Canadian dollar) which is far more than what is required for my tuition fees and living expenses for the entire period of my study in Canada. I am pleased to provide the bank statement for myself.

DURATION OF STAY:

Course start date is May 03, 2018, and End date is December 31, 2019.
Therefore, in view of the above, I most respectfully request you to grant me a Study Permit. In this connection, if you have any questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at my telephone number.


Finally, I thank you for your kind and sympathetic consideration this matter, I remain.

Yours truly,

 

[rish888]

SUBMISSION

Dear Visa Officer:

I submit this Statement of Purpose as part of my application for a study permit to enable me to purpose a post-graduate degree at Selkirk College International (DLI # 019360990072), Castlegar, British Columbia, Canada in the field of Business Administration. My classes are scheduled to commence on May 2, 2018. I applied for a study permit on Oct 31, 2017 (Application # S301906691, UCI # 1105991433). However, my application for a Study Permit was refused by the High Commission of Canada’s letter dated Nov 20, 2017, which reads “You have not satisfied me that you would leave Canada at the end of your stay. In reaching this decision, I considered several factors including the purpose of visit. Upon a complete review of the application, previous academic and employment history and reasonableness of undertaking the proposed studies in Canada, I am not satisfied you are a bona fide student & would depart Canada at the end of authorized stay”.

I would like to address the concerns raised in the above-mentioned letter as follows:


I have done a MSc Chemistry and currently work at OLFRESH (PVT) Limited, Pakistan. A degree in Business Administration will provide me with the knowledge and qualifications I need to attain a managerial-level position in companies in Pakistan. This course is perfect for me as it consists of managerial, administrative and presentational skills. My intensive previous work experience in corporate organizations makes this program more meaningful as I will be able to understand the academic material better by using my work experience as a reference point. I am quite confident that after completion of the study in Canada in the field of Business Administration, I will be more successful running my job in the field. It will also enable me to spread my personal business also for which I have great dreams.

Remove the bold, I feel it's redundant. Also, your personal business? That seems to be a contradiction as it begins with saying you work for a company.


I would like to study in Canada as it offers a quality and state of the art education and because Canada's higher education system more affordable in comparison to the rest of the English-speaking countries. Furthermore, degrees from Canadian institutes are recognized globally and valued by employers.


In response to concerns that I may overstay, I wish to inform you that I have no intention whatsoever to overstay in Canada. After the completion of my education in Canada, I plan to return to Pakistan where there a numerous opportunities for people with a foreign education in my chosen field.

I have a wife and a young child living in Pakistan to whom I need to return after my education in Canada. As such, I am not a risk of overstaying given my considerable family ties in Pakistan.

My current monthly income exceeds CA$4,000/month (a considerable sum of money in relation to the cost of living in Pakistan) and will increase after I complete my education, as such I face no economic problems or a lack of job prospects in Pakistan that would place me at risk of overstaying in Canada.

MY FINANCIAL STATUS:

I have a current balance of 4,000,000 Pakistani rupees (Equivalent to Canadian $45454.54 approx. Calculated at current exchange rate of Rs. 88.0 per Canadian dollar) which exceeds my cost of tuition and living expenses for my entire period of my study in Canada. I have attached my bank statement in connection to my application.

DURATION OF STAY:

My course begins on May 03, 2018, and ends on December 31, 2019.

I hope I have addressed any concerns the High Commission may have that would prevent me from receiving a student visa, and should there continue to be concerns I will be happy to address them.


Yours truly,

 

[rish888]

Note:

I only touched grammar and clarity, the content is untouched. Another member with more experience can comment on the actual content.

 

[Muzammal Farooq]

Thanks for your response. But If I removed the Bold Words and relation of Science graduation with Business studies then how we can justify the relevance of this course to my previous academic and employment history?????
Further, I think Business support somewhat ties to the country of origin.
My Last refusal was on stance that," Previous academic, employment history and reasonableness of chosen course don't satisfy that I am a bona fide student"

Note:

I only touched grammar and clarity, the content is untouched. Another member with more experience can comment on the actual content.

 

[rish888]

Thanks for your response. But If I removed the Bold Words and relation of Science graduation with Business studies then how we can justify the relevance of this course to my previous academic and employment history?????
Further, I think Business support somewhat ties to the country of origin.
My Last refusal was on stance that," Previous academic, employment history and reasonableness of chosen course don't satisfy that I am a bona fide student"

Oh sorry, I highlighted too much. I only meant to highlight the last line where you take about your business and spreading your wings. Btw do you work for a company or run your own business, your SOP is not very clear.

 

[Muzammal Farooq]

Oh sorry, I highlighted too much. I only meant to highlight the last line where you take about your business and spreading your wings. Btw do you work for a company or run your own business, your SOP is not very clear.

Thanks for clarity.....Further, I have also shown my business in my last SOP . Is it good to contradict Current SOP and Previous SOP?

My Previous SOP was;


STATEMENT OF PURPOSE

One of the most important lessons that I have learnt from life is to make the best of what I have. I believe this is one of the most important rules that can help survive a person in a developing country like Pakistan. It is respectfully submitted that I have been granted admission in Selkirk College International (DLI # 019360990072), Castlegar, British Columbia, Canada in the field of Business Administration at Post Graduate level. My classes are scheduled to commence from January 03, 2018.

My name is Muzammal Farooq and I have done M.Sc. Chemistry. On 15 February 2017, I joined ENGI PLASTIC INDUSTRIES (PVT) Limited, Lahore Pakistan as a Management System Coordinator after doing my job in Coca Cola Beverages Pakistan for about 07 Years. The social conditions in Pakistan basically generated my will to excel. I humbly realized how fortunate are those who are able to afford an education, specifically quality education. Owing to both this very realization and the feeling of making a difference, I am determined to make it count not just for my sake, but also for the sake of my fellow countrymen to whom I owe as much as I owe to myself.

From my last job I realized that in order to acquire a Managerial Position in Pakistan, Business Studies are mandatory and especially most of the people at Higher Position have acquired Business education from foreign Institutes. To fulfill my dream to job at a Managerial Position in Pakistan, I decided to acquire Business studies from Canada. I am quite confident that after completion of study in Canada in the field of Business Administration, I will be more successfully running my job in the field back home Pakistan.

The reason for selecting CANADA as my study destination is because CANADA is offering quality and state of the art education. Many people have joined in different organizations in Pakistan after completion of Business Studies from Canadian Institutes.

This course is perfect for me as it consists of managerial, administrative and presentational skills.

Combined with my current qualification, the Post-Graduation in Business Administration will make me more demanding for the organizations in Pakistan. My aim is not only to learn by attending an institution but also to learn from environment, and CANADA is a country which ensures favorable environment for international students.



I will abide by all the rules and regulations during my studies in Canada. I will never overstay there and will be back to my homeland as I have my family here. Apart from this, I have my inherited property of high worth in my home town. There is a great potential and many opportunities for people having foreign education especially in my chosen field. I have a well-established side business in Marketing and is earning a handsome amount of money every month (in excess of C$2000).


Therefore, in view of the above, I most respectfully request you to grant me a Study Permit. In this connection, if you have any questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at my telephone number.


Finally, I thank you for your kind and sympathetic consideration into this matter, I remain,


Yours truly,

 

[rish888]

there seems to be a contradiction between the two SOP's in your income and the company in which you work. (not good.)

Also, if I was the visa officer I would wonder why you're leaving your family behind in Pakistan.

But, as I said, I can't touch upon the content as I've never applied for a Canadian study permit.

If you have your own business then explain it clearly in the SOP.

 

[Muzammal Farooq]

there seems to be a contradiction between the two SOP's in your income and the company in which you work. (not good.)

Also, if I was the visa officer I would wonder why you're leaving your family behind in Pakistan.

But, as I said, I can't touch upon the content as I've never applied for a Canadian study permit.

If you have your own business then explain it clearly in the SOP.

Thanks for your response.
Sir, I have Business Documents like NTN number to show business but I can't show full dependence on business as in my last SOP I have just show side business of worth only 2000 and it can't improve to much extent. I am just showing side business to show my ties with the home country.
Further, suggest me please what you think best to satisfy visa officer.

 

[Muzammal Farooq]

Thanks for your response Sir. I have got GCMS notes that have following detail note on my Student Visa Refusal,

"30 yrs old. married. To study business/Mgmntlmarketing at Selkirk college. Completed masters in Chemistry in Lahore in 2012. Working since 2008 ; current employment as Management systems coordinator since feb 2017 for plastic industries, Applicant intends to study in an equal or lesser field than what PA has already accomplished. I am not satisfied proposed studies offset the costs of studying abroad rather than pursuing programs available in country. Ties would not be strong to home country & there would be incentive to remain in Canada given the economic & security situation there. Upon a complete review of the application, previous education history, employment & the reasonableness of undertaking the proposed studies in Canada, I am not satisfied that the applicant is a genuine student who would depart Canada at the end of the period authorized. Application refused".

Please help me to remove these objections to reapply for a student visa.

 

[sajidmahars]

Muzammal Farooq, please call me at 0304-0923181

 

[Bigyapti]

Hello,
Anyone mind reviewing my SOP?

 

[Avtar_15]

SUBMISSION

It is respectfully submitted that I have been granted admission in Selkirk College International (DLI # 019360990072), Castlegar, British Columbia, Canada in the field of Business Administration at Post Graduate level. My classes are scheduled to commence from May 2, 2018. In fact, I applied for a study permit on Oct 31, 2017 (Application # S301906691, UCI # 1105991433). However, to my surprise, my application for a Study Permit was refused by the High Commission of Canada’s letter dated Nov 20, 2017, which read Quote “You have not satisfied me that you would leave Canada at the end of your stay. In reaching this decision, I considered several factors including the purpose of visit.”

Other reason “Upon a complete review of the application, previous academic and employment history and reasonableness of undertaking the proposed studies in Canada, I am not satisfied you are a bona fide student & would depart Canada at the end of authorized stay”.

In this connection, I would like to address the concerns raised in the above-mentioned letter as follows:


STATEMENT of PURPOSE:

I have done MSc Chemistry and working in OLFRESH (PVT) Limited, Pakistan. The postgraduate program in which I have to get enrolled is an important leader of my success to reach a Managerial Position in the Corporate organization in Pakistan. Science graduation accompanied with Business Studies is quite demanding for Corporate set up as it is a professional course that will develop all the skills which are necessary for the corporate world. This course is perfect for me as it consists of managerial, administrative and presentational skills. My intensive previous work experience in corporate organizations makes this program more meaningful as I will be able to understand the academic material better by using my work experience as a reference point. I am quite confident that after completion of the study in Canada in the field of Business Administration, I will be more successful running my job in the field. It will also enable me to spread my personal business also for which I have great dreams.

The reason for selecting CANADA as my study destination is because CANADA is offering quality and state of the art education. Many people have joined in different organizations in Pakistan after completion of Business Studies from Canadian Institutes. My aim is not only to learn by attending an institution but also to learn from, and CANADA is a country which ensures for international students.
I wish to inform you that I do not have any intention whatsoever to overstay in Canada. After completion of my study in Canada, I plan to return to my home country where there a great potential and many opportunities for people having foreign education in my chosen field. You will appreciate that I am the beloved member of my family. My Mother wants me to further strengthen my knowledge on more modern lines after completion of the study in Canada. Further, I am leaving behind my Mother, beloved Wife and a little Child in addition to many other close relatives. Therefore, I would not like to be separated from my nucleus family in Pakistan, by deciding to overstay in Canada.

Further, I have a well-established side business in Marketing and am earning a handsome amount of money every month (in excess of C$4000). Hence, I do not have any economic or social problems in Pakistan to look for residence abroad.

MY FINANCIAL STATUS:

As I have been working as Visiting Real Estate Advisor and you will see the contents of my own bank statement, I have a current balance of Pakistani rupees 40,000,00 (Equivalent to Canadian $45454.54 approx. Calculated at current exchange rate of Rs. 88.0 per Canadian dollar) which is far more than what is required for my tuition fees and living expenses for the entire period of my study in Canada. I am pleased to provide the bank statement for myself.

DURATION OF STAY:

Course start date is May 03, 2018, and End date is December 31, 2019.
Therefore, in view of the above, I most respectfully request you to grant me a Study Permit. In this connection, if you have any questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at my telephone number.


Finally, I thank you for your kind and sympathetic consideration this matter, I remain.

Yours truly,

Did you get your visa ?

 

[Kirk2]

TATEMENT OF PURPOSE
To
The Visa Officer
Canadian Embassy
Respected Sir/Ma’am,
My name is Kiranpreet Kaur. I belong to Jalandhar. I am a budding business professional.
After completing my Senior Secondary High School, I am keen to know more about
Commerce as it is not only the branch of Business, but also of the flourishing trade where
lucrative career options are available.
I have successfully completed my matriculation with 7.2 CGPA. I chose Commerce after
my high school and cleared Senior Secondary Education in 2017. During school time,
Accountancy and Business Studies have been my favorite subjects. As if on one hand,
Accounting taught me the basics of Book keeping and making Balance Sheets then
Business Studies helped me to know the basics about how to manage Business with the
help of Planning, Organizing and Directing. My curiosity kept on increasing with the
passage of time as I found it miraculous how Business tracks its operations; from
decision making to performance evaluation, how such aspects are taken care. This made
me select the program named BUSINESS- ACCOUNTING in CAMBRIAN COLLEGE
to excel more in this stream. I have achieved overall 6 Bands in IELTS.
Business is not only about earning money and paying off expenses, it is much more
beyond that. It involves each step from markets surveys which are before the start of the
product to getting replies from the customers after the launch of the manufactured
product. Business- Accounting in Cambrian College is a program which can be delivered
through both class room learning as well as online lectures. This general accounting
stream helps to achieve the skills and hands-on experience to land into entry-level
accounting positions within non-profits, corporations, and other for-profit organizations.
After following a first year of common curriculum shared by all accounting and business
students, one will be immersed in accounting principles and practices and will have the
opportunity to gain real-world experience. Students are taught how to move in business
world by minimizing taxes and bolstering profits. They are made competent to work with
the top most companies to attain their goals by providing the solid foundation to them.
Cambrian College has designed this program to accommodate students who want to
continue their studies towards a degree or to get entry into professional accounting
programs such as the Advanced Certificate in Accounting and Finance (ACAF) or the
Certified Aboriginal Financial Manager (CAFM) designation. Cambrian has divided the
courses efficiently to make students understand the concepts properly. In Semester 1,
there are courses like Business Mathematics, College Communications, and Introduction
to Human Resources and Computer Applications for Business. Where as in term 2, Micro
Economics, Financial math, Business Reports and Presentations are taught. Before
completing Term 3, Organizational Behavior, Statistics, Canadian Political Studies and
Media and Current events are made clear. To end up the session, knowledge about
Taxation, Intermediate Accounting, Business Law and Finance is also imparted.
This program will not only provide me with the thorough knowledge about business but
will also assist me to settle down in life. There are many kinds of employments which a
person can find after the completion of the program like Accounts Payable, Analyst, and
Small Business Accountant or can also apply for various other Accounting, Book keeping
and related office positions.
Exploring world for the sake of education has always been thrilling. It always proves to
be an incredible start of a new career. Career can be rewarding, if it is learned from a
renowned country. Canada holds the power to impart the education to change the
students’ outlook towards life. It makes it a point to teach theory in depth along with
practical know how. Education received from this country will surely change my fortune
and will assist me to attain my goal.
I humbly request the visa officer to grant me visa to explore new options in life. It will
surely be a life changing decision of my life.
Regards,
Kiranpreet Kaur

 

[Asish#11]

Hey are you still in Selkirk college I'm coming to the college this September 2019 for the same program the need you help about the place Castlegar like part time job availability, etc... .Plz if you're willing to help me, I will be very thankful.. my email is - asishmondalyci@gmail.com

 

[lovekomikael]

SUBMISSION

It is respectfully submitted that I have been granted admission in Selkirk College International (DLI # 019360990072), Castlegar, British Columbia, Canada in the field of Business Administration at Post Graduate level. My classes are scheduled to commence from May 2, 2018. In fact, I applied for a study permit on Oct 31, 2017 (Application # S301906691, UCI # 1105991433). However, to my surprise, my application for a Study Permit was refused by the High Commission of Canada’s letter dated Nov 20, 2017, which read Quote “You have not satisfied me that you would leave Canada at the end of your stay. In reaching this decision, I considered several factors including the purpose of visit.”

Other reason “Upon a complete review of the application, previous academic and employment history and reasonableness of undertaking the proposed studies in Canada, I am not satisfied you are a bona fide student & would depart Canada at the end of authorized stay”.

In this connection, I would like to address the concerns raised in the above-mentioned letter as follows:


STATEMENT of PURPOSE:

I have done MSc Chemistry and working in OLFRESH (PVT) Limited, Pakistan. The postgraduate program in which I have to get enrolled is an important leader of my success to reach a Managerial Position in the Corporate organization in Pakistan. Science graduation accompanied with Business Studies is quite demanding for Corporate set up as it is a professional course that will develop all the skills which are necessary for the corporate world. This course is perfect for me as it consists of managerial, administrative and presentational skills. My intensive previous work experience in corporate organizations makes this program more meaningful as I will be able to understand the academic material better by using my work experience as a reference point. I am quite confident that after completion of the study in Canada in the field of Business Administration, I will be more successful running my job in the field. It will also enable me to spread my personal business also for which I have great dreams.

The reason for selecting CANADA as my study destination is because CANADA is offering quality and state of the art education. Many people have joined in different organizations in Pakistan after completion of Business Studies from Canadian Institutes. My aim is not only to learn by attending an institution but also to learn from, and CANADA is a country which ensures for international students.
I wish to inform you that I do not have any intention whatsoever to overstay in Canada. After completion of my study in Canada, I plan to return to my home country where there a great potential and many opportunities for people having foreign education in my chosen field. You will appreciate that I am the beloved member of my family. My Mother wants me to further strengthen my knowledge on more modern lines after completion of the study in Canada. Further, I am leaving behind my Mother, beloved Wife and a little Child in addition to many other close relatives. Therefore, I would not like to be separated from my nucleus family in Pakistan, by deciding to overstay in Canada.

Further, I have a well-established side business in Marketing and am earning a handsome amount of money every month (in excess of C$4000). Hence, I do not have any economic or social problems in Pakistan to look for residence abroad.

MY FINANCIAL STATUS:

As I have been working as Visiting Real Estate Advisor and you will see the contents of my own bank statement, I have a current balance of Pakistani rupees 40,000,00 (Equivalent to Canadian $45454.54 approx. Calculated at current exchange rate of Rs. 88.0 per Canadian dollar) which is far more than what is required for my tuition fees and living expenses for the entire period of my study in Canada. I am pleased to provide the bank statement for myself.

DURATION OF STAY:

Course start date is May 03, 2018, and End date is December 31, 2019.
Therefore, in view of the above, I most respectfully request you to grant me a Study Permit. In this connection, if you have any questions or concerns please do not hesitate to contact me at my telephone number.


Finally, I thank you for your kind and sympathetic consideration this matter, I remain.

Yours truly,

Have they approved your application after submitting a Statement of Purpose letter? Thanks