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On a casual note... LESSONS OF LIFE -Enjoy it's every Moment !!!

qorax

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A Great speech
By:- (Late)Mr. Lakshman Kadirgamar, the Hon. Foreign Minister of Sri Lanka

[An after-dinner speech, off the cuff, in the UK, at which Sri Lankan Cricketers were present]
[This was at an earlier World Cup time]


Not only for Cricketers & Politicians; but in fact for all Men, Women and Children...

How many ministers, in the world, can make a similar speech today?
Long, but read on - It'll blow your socks-off...
____________________________________________________________________________________


"Captain Atapattu and members of the Sri Lankan team, Members of the Sri Lankan community, Friends of Sri Lanka, Ladies and Gentlemen,

Some historians say, I think uncharitably, that cricket is really a diabolical political strategy, disguised as a game, in fact a substitute for War, invented by the ingenious British - to confuse the natives by encouraging them to fight each other - instead of their imperial rulers.

The world is divided into two camps - those who revel in the intricacies of cricket and those who are totally baffled by it, who cannot figure out why a group of energetic young men should spend days, often in the hot sun or bitter cold, chasing a ball across an open field, hitting it from time to time with a stick - all to the rapturous applause of thousands, now millions, of ecstatic spectators across the world. The game has developed a mystical language of its own that further bewilders those who are already befuddled by its complexities.

In the course of my travels I have a hard time explaining to the non-cricketing world - in America, China, Europe and Russia - that a 'googly' is not an Indian sweetmeat; that a 'square cut' is not a choice selection of prime beef; that a 'cover drive' is not a secluded part of the garden; that a 'bouncer' is not a muscular guard at a night club, that a 'Yorker' is not some exotic cocktail mixed in Yorkshire or that a 'leg-break' is not a sinister manoeuvre designed to cripple your opponent's limbs below the waist.

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me see whether politics and cricket have anything in common. Both are games. Politicians and cricketers are superficially similar, and yet very different. Both groups are wooed by the cruel public who embrace them today and reject them tomorrow.

Cricketers work hard; politicians only pretend to do so. Cricketers are disciplined; discipline is a word unknown to most politicians in any language. Cricketers risk their own limbs in the heat of honourable play; politicians encourage others to risk their limbs in pursuit of fruitless causes while they remain secure in the safety of their pavilions. Cricketers deserve the rewards they get; the people get the politicians they deserve. Cricketers retire young; politicians go on for ever. Cricketers unite the country; politicians divide it. Cricketers accept the umpire's verdict even-if they disagree with it; politicians who disagree with an ombudsman-usually get him transferred. Cricketers stick to their team through victory and defeat, politicians in a losing team always cross over and try joining the winning team. Clearly, cricketers are the better breed.

It is said that the task of a foreign minister is to lie effusively for his country abroad. That may be true, but it is certainly true that he has to fight for his country and defend it at all times. Our cricketers may recall that in the run-up to the 1995 World Cup, Australia refused to play a match in Colombo, citing security reasons. Shane Warne said he wouldn't come to Colombo because he couldn't do any shopping there. The press asked me for a comment. I said "shopping is for sissies". There was a storm of protest in Australia... A TV interviewer asked me whether I had ever played cricket. I said I had played before he was born - without helmets and thigh guards, on matting wickets that were full of holes and stones, and I had my share of broken bones to show it.

My friend, the Australian foreign minister was drawn into the fray and phoned me. We decided to cool things down. A combined India/Pakistan team came to Colombo at very short notice to play an exhibition match in place of the Australian match. It was a magnificent gesture of South Asian solidarity. Against strong security advice I went on to the field to greet and thank our friends from India and Pakistan. When the whole episode was over I sent a bouquet of flowers to my Australian counterpart. Flowers are also for sissies.

I remember vividly the incident that occurred in Australia when Murali was called for throwing and Arjuna led his team to the boundary in protest, but cleverly refrained from crossing it. I was watching TV in Colombo. As a past captain I asked myself what I would have done in Arjuna's place. In my mind I had no hesitation in supporting his decision. A few minutes later the phone rang. The President of the Board called to ask for advice. I said Arjuna was right because a captain must, on the field, stand up for his men and protect them, but the consequences must not be allowed to go too far; good lawyers must be engaged and a reasonable compromise must be reached. That was done. During that tour I paid an official visit to Australia... My friend, the Australian foreign minister in the course of a dinner speech invited me to go with him the next day to Adelaide, his home town, to watch the final day's play. I knew what the result was going to be. In my reply I said that at the end of the match I did not want to be the one to tell him that Australia had "won by a Hair". Accordingly, I went back home, as planned, to maintain the good relations that we have with Australia...

Foreign ministers sometimes find themselves in very difficult situations. Take the case of the Foreign Minister of Uganda. President Idi Amin told him that he wanted to change the name of Uganda to Idi. The minister was asked to canvas world opinion and return in two weeks. He did not do so. He was summoned and asked to explain. He said: "Mr. President, I have been informed that there is a country called Cyprus . Its citizens are called Cypriots; if we change the name of our country to 'Idi' our citizens would be called... Idiots". Reason prevailed.

A story goes that a shark was asked why diplomats were his preferred food. He replied "because their brains being small are a tasty morsel, their spines being supple I can chew on them at leisure - and they come delightfully marinaded in alcohol."

Ladies and Gentlemen, as I approach the close of this brief address I wish to speak directly to our Sri Lankan team. Today we lost a match. But you lost to the rain and M/s Duckworth & Lewis. You did not lose to England. Only a few weeks ago you had a resounding victory against South Africa. You will win again tomorrow. What is important is to keep up your confidence and spirits. All of us, your fellow countrymen and women, have been enormously impressed in recent times by the commitment, discipline, athleticism and determination that you have displayed in the field. The people are with you. We all know that each and every one of you, are constantly busy honing your skills. We can see that you are maintaining a high standard of physical fitness. When the people see this it gives them not only immense pleasure but the moral upliftment that Sri Lankans are capable of in rising to the challenge of sustained performance.

Every team loses. It takes two to play a game. One has to lose. It is the manner in which you play the game which gives the promise of success to come. It is a great pleasure to see how youngsters are being drafted into the national team. Our team is united; it affects all the races and religions of our country. Cricket, like all international sport today, is highly competitive; and so it must be, and so it must remain. It must always be regarded as a very high honour to represent one's country at any sport. All of you are role models for our youth. They will be looking to see how you take defeat. To exult in victory is easy; to remain well balanced in defeat is a mark of maturity.

Do not allow yourselves to be disturbed by the armchair critics who will no doubt engage in a display of theoretical learning on how the game was played. Many of these critics have never put bat to ball. It makes them feel good to indulge in the past time of amateur criticism. They do not know what it is to face fast bowling in fading light; to engage in a run race against daunting odds; to find the stamina and sheer physical endurance to spend concentrated hours in the field of play. They know nothing of the psychological pressure that modern sportsmen are subject to. Therefore, my advice to you is - ignore them. Go your way with customary discipline and methodical preparation for the next game, the next series in different parts of the world under different conditions.

For me it has been a great pleasure and an honour to be here with you tonight. When I was invited to be the Chief Guest at this occasion on my way to New York for the General Assembly of the United Nations, I accepted with eager anticipation of meeting our cricketers and relaxing for a moment.

Nobody told me that I had to make a speech, until last night when it dawned on me then that
there is no such thing as a free dinner!"
____________________________________________________________________________________

Reproduced by:
Qorax

~This is what leadership is all about.
~What a Global Statesman - Minister par Excellence!
~Does it matter whether I'm Black or White?
~Which part of the world I'm from?
~What matters is the humanity in me... The Commitment... The meat in me!
~That's what Minister-Lakshman Kadirgamar was all about - A True Leader!!!
~Think About It!!!
 

home1

Full Member
Mar 31, 2010
27
6
This is a must read - There you have it , the official indian position that indians have different standards of personal hygiene to westerners says commonwealth games official

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/deannelson/100055085/indians-have-different-standards-of-personal-hygiene-to-westerners-says-commonwealth-games-official/

ha ha
 

pooja82

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Sometime in March, April :-)
qorax ji
tusi vi gr8t
thuhade jokes vi gr8t
kya baat hai
cheers
pooja
 

vaibhavvd

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First Q 2014
The Best of Dilbert Out-Of-Office" E-Mail Auto-Reply:

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

3: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management

4: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

6: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many individuals did this over and over).

7: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks. {no need for any guesses who'd have this kind of automatic reply, of course CHC London}

8: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

9: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave me any messages.

10: I've run away to join a different circus.

AND,
FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE
11: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Loretta' instead of 'Steve'
 

captain74

Star Member
Jun 21, 2009
196
11
vaibhavvd said:
The Best of Dilbert Out-Of-Office" E-Mail Auto-Reply:

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

3: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management

4: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

6: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many individuals did this over and over).

7: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks. {no need for any guesses who'd have this kind of automatic reply, of course CHC London}

8: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

9: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave me any messages.

10: I've run away to join a different circus.

AND,
FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE
11: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as 'Loretta' instead of 'Steve'
Too good!
 

captain74

Star Member
Jun 21, 2009
196
11
qorax said:
A Great speech
By:- (Late)Mr. Lakshman Kadirgamar, the Hon. Foreign Minister of Sri Lanka

[An after-dinner speech, off the cuff, in the UK, at which Sri Lankan Cricketers were present]
[This was at an earlier World Cup time]


Not only for Cricketers & Politicians; but in fact for all Men, Women and Children...

How many ministers, in the world, can make a similar speech today?
Long, but read on - It'll blow your socks-off...
____________________________________________________________________________________


"Captain Atapattu and members of the Sri Lankan team, Members of the Sri Lankan community, Friends of Sri Lanka, Ladies and Gentlemen,

Some historians say, I think uncharitably, that cricket is really a diabolical political strategy, disguised as a game, in fact a substitute for War, invented by the ingenious British - to confuse the natives by encouraging them to fight each other - instead of their imperial rulers.

The world is divided into two camps - those who revel in the intricacies of cricket and those who are totally baffled by it, who cannot figure out why a group of energetic young men should spend days, often in the hot sun or bitter cold, chasing a ball across an open field, hitting it from time to time with a stick - all to the rapturous applause of thousands, now millions, of ecstatic spectators across the world. The game has developed a mystical language of its own that further bewilders those who are already befuddled by its complexities.

In the course of my travels I have a hard time explaining to the non-cricketing world - in America, China, Europe and Russia - that a 'googly' is not an Indian sweetmeat; that a 'square cut' is not a choice selection of prime beef; that a 'cover drive' is not a secluded part of the garden; that a 'bouncer' is not a muscular guard at a night club, that a 'Yorker' is not some exotic cocktail mixed in Yorkshire or that a 'leg-break' is not a sinister manoeuvre designed to cripple your opponent's limbs below the waist.

Ladies and Gentlemen, let me see whether politics and cricket have anything in common. Both are games. Politicians and cricketers are superficially similar, and yet very different. Both groups are wooed by the cruel public who embrace them today and reject them tomorrow.

Cricketers work hard; politicians only pretend to do so. Cricketers are disciplined; discipline is a word unknown to most politicians in any language. Cricketers risk their own limbs in the heat of honourable play; politicians encourage others to risk their limbs in pursuit of fruitless causes while they remain secure in the safety of their pavilions. Cricketers deserve the rewards they get; the people get the politicians they deserve. Cricketers retire young; politicians go on for ever. Cricketers unite the country; politicians divide it. Cricketers accept the umpire's verdict even-if they disagree with it; politicians who disagree with an ombudsman-usually get him transferred. Cricketers stick to their team through victory and defeat, politicians in a losing team always cross over and try joining the winning team. Clearly, cricketers are the better breed.

It is said that the task of a foreign minister is to lie effusively for his country abroad. That may be true, but it is certainly true that he has to fight for his country and defend it at all times. Our cricketers may recall that in the run-up to the 1995 World Cup, Australia refused to play a match in Colombo, citing security reasons. Shane Warne said he wouldn't come to Colombo because he couldn't do any shopping there. The press asked me for a comment. I said "shopping is for sissies". There was a storm of protest in Australia... A TV interviewer asked me whether I had ever played cricket. I said I had played before he was born - without helmets and thigh guards, on matting wickets that were full of holes and stones, and I had my share of broken bones to show it.

My friend, the Australian foreign minister was drawn into the fray and phoned me. We decided to cool things down. A combined India/Pakistan team came to Colombo at very short notice to play an exhibition match in place of the Australian match. It was a magnificent gesture of South Asian solidarity. Against strong security advice I went on to the field to greet and thank our friends from India and Pakistan. When the whole episode was over I sent a bouquet of flowers to my Australian counterpart. Flowers are also for sissies.

I remember vividly the incident that occurred in Australia when Murali was called for throwing and Arjuna led his team to the boundary in protest, but cleverly refrained from crossing it. I was watching TV in Colombo. As a past captain I asked myself what I would have done in Arjuna's place. In my mind I had no hesitation in supporting his decision. A few minutes later the phone rang. The President of the Board called to ask for advice. I said Arjuna was right because a captain must, on the field, stand up for his men and protect them, but the consequences must not be allowed to go too far; good lawyers must be engaged and a reasonable compromise must be reached. That was done. During that tour I paid an official visit to Australia... My friend, the Australian foreign minister in the course of a dinner speech invited me to go with him the next day to Adelaide, his home town, to watch the final day's play. I knew what the result was going to be. In my reply I said that at the end of the match I did not want to be the one to tell him that Australia had "won by a Hair". Accordingly, I went back home, as planned, to maintain the good relations that we have with Australia...

Foreign ministers sometimes find themselves in very difficult situations. Take the case of the Foreign Minister of Uganda. President Idi Amin told him that he wanted to change the name of Uganda to Idi. The minister was asked to canvas world opinion and return in two weeks. He did not do so. He was summoned and asked to explain. He said: "Mr. President, I have been informed that there is a country called Cyprus . Its citizens are called Cypriots; if we change the name of our country to 'Idi' our citizens would be called... Idiots". Reason prevailed.

A story goes that a shark was asked why diplomats were his preferred food. He replied "because their brains being small are a tasty morsel, their spines being supple I can chew on them at leisure - and they come delightfully marinaded in alcohol."

Ladies and Gentlemen, as I approach the close of this brief address I wish to speak directly to our Sri Lankan team. Today we lost a match. But you lost to the rain and M/s Duckworth & Lewis. You did not lose to England. Only a few weeks ago you had a resounding victory against South Africa. You will win again tomorrow. What is important is to keep up your confidence and spirits. All of us, your fellow countrymen and women, have been enormously impressed in recent times by the commitment, discipline, athleticism and determination that you have displayed in the field. The people are with you. We all know that each and every one of you, are constantly busy honing your skills. We can see that you are maintaining a high standard of physical fitness. When the people see this it gives them not only immense pleasure but the moral upliftment that Sri Lankans are capable of in rising to the challenge of sustained performance.

Every team loses. It takes two to play a game. One has to lose. It is the manner in which you play the game which gives the promise of success to come. It is a great pleasure to see how youngsters are being drafted into the national team. Our team is united; it affects all the races and religions of our country. Cricket, like all international sport today, is highly competitive; and so it must be, and so it must remain. It must always be regarded as a very high honour to represent one's country at any sport. All of you are role models for our youth. They will be looking to see how you take defeat. To exult in victory is easy; to remain well balanced in defeat is a mark of maturity.

Do not allow yourselves to be disturbed by the armchair critics who will no doubt engage in a display of theoretical learning on how the game was played. Many of these critics have never put bat to ball. It makes them feel good to indulge in the past time of amateur criticism. They do not know what it is to face fast bowling in fading light; to engage in a run race against daunting odds; to find the stamina and sheer physical endurance to spend concentrated hours in the field of play. They know nothing of the psychological pressure that modern sportsmen are subject to. Therefore, my advice to you is - ignore them. Go your way with customary discipline and methodical preparation for the next game, the next series in different parts of the world under different conditions.

For me it has been a great pleasure and an honour to be here with you tonight. When I was invited to be the Chief Guest at this occasion on my way to New York for the General Assembly of the United Nations, I accepted with eager anticipation of meeting our cricketers and relaxing for a moment.

Nobody told me that I had to make a speech, until last night when it dawned on me then that
there is no such thing as a free dinner!"
____________________________________________________________________________________

Reproduced by:
Qorax

~This is what leadership is all about.
~What a Global Statesman - Minister par Excellence!
~Does it matter whether I'm Black or White?
~Which part of the world I'm from?
~What matters is the humanity in me... The Commitment... The meat in me!
~That's what Minister-Lakshman Kadirgamar was all about - A True Leader!!!
~Think About It!!!
Oh man - this one is worth copying and keeping!

Thanks buddy for digging out and sharing this gem!
 

mirza897

Hero Member
Apr 4, 2010
320
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Captain!,

It was one of the best speeches I have read. Thank you for such wonderful posts. God bless you and a +1 for u Sir!!

Mirza
 

immigrantapplicant

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qorax said:
Lessons of Life -- once again...

There ........ SERENITY...

Qorax

Good one
 

vaibhavvd

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First Q 2014
ITS ABOUT SYSTEM


SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.


COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.


NAZISM:
You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.


AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.


FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.


A! BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.


LEBANON SYSTEM:
You have two cows. One is owned by Syria and the other is controlled by the government.


EGYPT SYSTEM:
You have two cows. Both vote for Mubarak.


DUBAI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You create a website for them and advertise them in all magazines. You create a ' Cow City ' or ' Milk Village ' for them. You sell off their milk before the cows have even been milked to both legit and shady investors who hope to re -sell the non-existent milk for a 100% profit in two years time. You bring Tiger Woods to milk the cow first to attract media attention.


SHARJAH SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You sell them to an investor in Dubai . The cows get stuck in traffic between Sharjah to Dubai and die. You have zero cows now.


ABUDHABI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. So what? We have Oil.
 

atul.amin

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Different Love letter and a beautiful reply to it.

Love Letter:


A Teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.

My Dearest Reshma, Please answer the following questionnaire.

For Options (a) 10 marks, (b) 5marks and (c) 3 marks.

1)Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me because:
(a) of love
(b) you couldn't control seeing me
(c) really ... am I doing it?

2) Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me because:
(a) you always like to see me smiling
(b) you are testing whether I like jokes
(c) you are attracted by my smile

3) When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you stopped singing because:
(a) you are so coy to sing before me
(b) my presence influenced you
(c) you feared that whether I'll like your song

4) When you were showing your childhood photo, when I asked for it, you hide it because:
(a) you felt ashamed
(b) you felt uneasy
(c) you don't know

5) During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you and you took only my friend's because:
(a) you enjoyed my disappointment
(b) you won't feel leaving my hand after grabbing
(c) you don't know

6) You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn't get into your bus...
(a) you were waiting for me
(b) you were dreaming about me and didn't notice the bus
(c) that bus was crowded

7) You introduced me to your parents when they came to college because:
(a) I am going to be your groom
(b) you just want to know what your parents think about me
(c) just you felt like introducing me to them

8 I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a rose on your head because:
(a) to fulfill my wish
(b) you like roses
(c) by chance you got a rose

9) On that day, it was my birthday. you too came to temple early at 6:00 AM because:
(a) you want to pray along with me
(b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday
(c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don't delay in expressing it.

If you have scored between 30 and 40, love is budding in your heart and it's getting ready to bloom.
If you have scored less than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.

Eagerly awaiting your reply..

love,
Rahul
 

atul.amin

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Reply:

Reshma's reply letter was also in Q/A format...

Rahul,

Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.
(a) Yes
(b) No

2) If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?
(a) Yes
(b) No

3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?
(a) Yes
(b) No

4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo. You poked your nose inside..... Right
(a) Yes
(b) No

5) I avoided holding your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand yet?
(a) Yes
(b) No

6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali) at the bus stand?
(a) Yes
(b) No

7) Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?
(a) Yes
(b) No

8 You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is it true ?
(a) Yes
(b) No

9) Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know?
(a) Yes
(b) No

If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I do not love you.

If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning of Love.

Hope everything is clear to you. ha... ha... haaaaaaaaa......
 

zsashimi

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atul.amin said:
Reply:

Reshma's reply letter was also in Q/A format...

Rahul,

Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.
(a) Yes
(b) No

2) If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?
(a) Yes
(b) No

3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?
(a) Yes
(b) No

4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo. You poked your nose inside..... Right
(a) Yes
(b) No

5) I avoided holding your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand yet?
(a) Yes
(b) No

6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali) at the bus stand?
(a) Yes
(b) No

7) Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?
(a) Yes
(b) No

8 You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is it true ?
(a) Yes
(b) No

9) Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know?
(a) Yes
(b) No

If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I do not love you.

If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning of Love.

Hope everything is clear to you. ha... ha... haaaaaaaaa......

Hahaha.. This is a cool way to dump a guy.. nice one!
 

sunny1975

Star Member
Jun 14, 2010
53
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Alcoholism
You have two cows
But you see four ;D


888888888888888888888888888


vaibhavvd said:
ITS ABOUT SYSTEM


SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.


COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.


NAZISM:
You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.


AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.


FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.


A! BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.


LEBANON SYSTEM:
You have two cows. One is owned by Syria and the other is controlled by the government.


EGYPT SYSTEM:
You have two cows. Both vote for Mubarak.


DUBAI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You create a website for them and advertise them in all magazines. You create a ' Cow City ' or ' Milk Village ' for them. You sell off their milk before the cows have even been milked to both legit and shady investors who hope to re -sell the non-existent milk for a 100% profit in two years time. You bring Tiger Woods to milk the cow first to attract media attention.


SHARJAH SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You sell them to an investor in Dubai . The cows get stuck in traffic between Sharjah to Dubai and die. You have zero cows now.


ABUDHABI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. So what? We have Oil.
 

vaibhavvd

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First Q 2014
very well said Sunny. it should have been included.