Need help sponsoring American wife

[joeinkocha]

Hello everyone,

Although my account is fairly new, I have been reading through these forums daily for the past few weeks. I have come up with some questions because of the lack of information I have found in regards to our situation (perhaps that's a good thing since it means people haven't had such troubles before ).

My fiancée and I met on a dating website for Catholic singles. She is American and I, the Canadian citizen, wish to sponsor her as a spouse with an outland application. We plan to get married next month in her state and then have her do the medical in Toronto and then finalize our application package and submit it in July. I have a few questions, however.

1) We are young and have not visited each other many times (when we apply, she will have visited twice and I visted her three times). We are both out of college and I will probably have a low-income job to start with, so I plan to temporarily live with my parents to save money. My parents do not approve of us getting married yet, and they would especially freak out if they hear that we have had a civil (non-Catholic) wedding. I don't want to tell them about the civil wedding. They will therefore not be in any wedding photos and not provide a letter to support our relationship. Will this cause a problem and are we likely to need an interview because of this? Also, I need to provide a mailing address on the application. Can I put a friends' address down or does it need to be my own permanent mailing address? I do not want my parents to find out about this.

2) If we do end up needing an interview, the interviewer will probably ask why my parents do not know about our wedding. Is it ok to say we just wanted to have a small wedding since my parents would not approve unless we got married in the church? We plan to have a bigger wedding and a church celebration next year, but seeing as we met on a Catholic dating site it may be hard to explain why we got married civilly instead of in the church like our church requires.

3) Here's a point I am the most worried about. We are getting married civilly next month so that by the time our church wedding happens, she can move to Canada with me and we can live together and she can work at the same time. She intends to change her last name to mine at the civil wedding, get a new passport, and we plan to open a joint bank account to save up money for the church wedding ceremony. However, we are devoutly Catholic and will not have sex until we are married in the church. If they ask us about this in the interview and we say we aren't having sex because we can't until we're married in the church, will they deny us because they think we are not a legitimate marriage? We love each other very much and have lots of proof (emails, letters, presents, skype logs, etc.) but not much hard proof (life insurance, property lease together, etc. since we are poor and just out of school). We will not lie about anything on our application and if this will stop us from applying, we might as well wait until we are married in the church, but would like to avoid having to be apart after the church ceremony. I hope there is no problem with this.

I hope these are clearly worded and easy to understand. I thank you all so much for your patience and I hope you can pay-it-forward so that when I am done with this process, I can help others like me in the future

 

[amikety]

1) We had no family at our wedding either. It happens. You'll need to write a statement to CIC explaining why they weren't there. Yes, you can use a friend's address - just make sure it's someone you trust because you may get personal/sensitive mailings from the Visa Office (VO).

You can always tell the VO you plan to have a formal Catholic ceremony later and invite your families then.

2) Yes, that's fine. I think in your case, if you have an interview and you get someone familiar with Catholicism, you may need to explain why you feel you have a valid marriage because techincally in Catholicism the only valid marriages are performed by the priest - meaning spiritually you wouldn't actually be married. (Legally, yes you are married no matter what the church feels.) The chances of a Canadian-American couple getting an interview are low. The chances of someone else (especially a non-Catholic) knowing what I just spouted off is even lower.

If you provide a complete application with good proof of a real, continuing relationship, you probably won't have an interview. In the event you do, what you said is fine. It's very similar to what I said in mine.

3) Well, you partially answered #2 Yes, I think the no sex part would pose a problem for the VO. I understand your stance - you would need to hope the officer understands your position or has some knowledge of Catholicism. In reality, chances for an interview are slim. In the event it does happen, don't offer this piece of information up, although the officer will probably ask. Your wife may want to have a letter from your/her priest or other literature from the church to help explain your joint position on pre-martial sex and civil marriage.

If she has a bachelor's degree, she should look into NAFTA. I'm not the most knowledgable person here regarding NAFTA - but I can point you in the right direction. NAFTA can be used to get a work permit.

If not, she will need to qualify as a temporary foreign worker, which is harder than it sounds. I'm also American and been trying for 21 months now to find work in Canada.

Now, chances are she will be allowed to stay in Canada as a visitor while you apply for sponsorship. That's how I've been here for 21 months. It's generally allowed for Americans with an active PR application (or intention to do one). Just make sure to maintain legal visitor status and no problems. She is allowed to search for work as a visitor - just can't work until she gets a work permit. Of course, she will need a place to live and it's best she live with you. (Helps proving that on going relationship part.)

Let me know what other questions you have

 

[kourts]

Hello! When my wife and I went through this we were also young and still are! 19 and 20 when we got married and applied. We were both living with our parents when we applied. Had a small wedding at the court house where just her mom,grandma,sister and aunt attended. She had only been down to see me once for 2 months and I had been up to see her 2 times,one week each time and then one time for a day before we sent the application in.

I think on the application it asks if your family knows or not.(not 100% sure) Just explain there or when you write about your relationship explain the situation in there. If you were to get an interview then explain to them honestly the situation. My wife and I had a small wedding like I said, explained that we didn't have money for a bigger one and that we didn't have money for a reception and that in the future we would be having a bigger wedding with a reception.

As far as not having life insurance together or a property lease, it's not a big deal we didn't either. I'm sure they'll understand that you're young and still living with your parents like we were. Show them you're joint saving account, we did.

Sorry I couldn't answer all of your questions but I'm sure someone else will be able to help you out.good luck.

 

[joeinkocha]

1) We had no family at our wedding either. It happens. You'll need to write a statement to CIC explaining why they weren't there. Yes, you can use a friend's address - just make sure it's someone you trust because you may get personal/sensitive mailings from the Visa Office (VO).

You can always tell the VO you plan to have a formal Catholic ceremony later and invite your families then.

2) Yes, that's fine. I think in your case, if you have an interview and you get someone familiar with Catholicism, you may need to explain why you feel you have a valid marriage because techincally in Catholicism the only valid marriages are performed by the priest - meaning spiritually you wouldn't actually be married. (Legally, yes you are married no matter what the church feels.) The chances of a Canadian-American couple getting an interview are low. The chances of someone else (especially a non-Catholic) knowing what I just spouted off is even lower.

If you provide a complete application with good proof of a real, continuing relationship, you probably won't have an interview. In the event you do, what you said is fine. It's very similar to what I said in mine.

3) Well, you partially answered #2 Yes, I think the no sex part would pose a problem for the VO. I understand your stance - you would need to hope the officer understands your position or has some knowledge of Catholicism. In reality, chances for an interview are slim. In the event it does happen, don't offer this piece of information up, although the officer will probably ask. Your wife may want to have a letter from your/her priest or other literature from the church to help explain your joint position on pre-martial sex and civil marriage.

If she has a bachelor's degree, she should look into NAFTA. I'm not the most knowledgable person here regarding NAFTA - but I can point you in the right direction. NAFTA can be used to get a work permit.

If not, she will need to qualify as a temporary foreign worker, which is harder than it sounds. I'm also American and been trying for 21 months now to find work in Canada.

Now, chances are she will be allowed to stay in Canada as a visitor while you apply for sponsorship. That's how I've been here for 21 months. It's generally allowed for Americans with an active PR application (or intention to do one). Just make sure to maintain legal visitor status and no problems. She is allowed to search for work as a visitor - just can't work until she gets a work permit. Of course, she will need a place to live and it's best she live with you. (Helps proving that on going relationship part.)

Let me know what other questions you have

Thank you so much for your reply, you seem very informed both about immigration and Catholicism

Just a few quick questions:
1) Is there a source you have about the information about using another person's mailing address? I have a couple of very trustful friends who's addresses I could use. However, is it easy to change the address if need be?

2) I haven't read too many stories of American-Canadian couples having interviews, do you know what would cause people to have one? I am assuming we have enough proof, so would it be people who are not citizens in the US, or have been previously divorced or something?

3) Do you know what would happen to us if we were rejected on the grounds of not having sex? Would we be able to appeal or re-apply? I want to know worst-case scenario for everything, sorry

Thanks again so so much, this really takes a load off of my worries!

 

[joeinkocha]

Hello! When my wife and I went through this we were also young and still are! 19 and 20 when we got married and applied. We were both living with our parents when we applied. Had a small wedding at the court house where just her mom,grandma,sister and aunt attended. She had only been down to see me once for 2 months and I had been up to see her 2 times,one week each time and then one time for a day before we sent the application in.

I think on the application it asks if your family knows or not.(not 100% sure) Just explain there or when you write about your relationship explain the situation in there. If you were to get an interview then explain to them honestly the situation. My wife and I had a small wedding like I said, explained that we didn't have money for a bigger one and that we didn't have money for a reception and that in the future we would be having a bigger wedding with a reception.

As far as not having life insurance together or a property lease, it's not a big deal we didn't either. I'm sure they'll understand that you're young and still living with your parents like we were. Show them you're joint saving account, we did.

Sorry I couldn't answer all of your questions but I'm sure someone else will be able to help you out.good luck.

Thank you so much for your reply, it has been really helpful! Nice to know someone who was in a similar situation. Did you end up having to go for an interview? Also, you say to be honest about what we want. Well, really, we see the marriage as being valid and want to be able to live together asap, but we also see that the church does not see it as valid and will not have sex because of this. Would the officer be okay with this or would they think we are getting married just so she can come earlier to Canada instead of applying after the church wedding and therefore see it as fraud or something?

Thanks so much again!

 

[amikety]

Thank you so much for your reply, you seem very informed both about immigration and Catholicism

Just a few quick questions:
1) Is there a source you have about the information about using another person's mailing address? I have a couple of very trustful friends who's addresses I could use. However, is it easy to change the address if need be?

2) I haven't read too many stories of American-Canadian couples having interviews, do you know what would cause people to have one? I am assuming we have enough proof, so would it be people who are not citizens in the US, or have been previously divorced or something?

3) Do you know what would happen to us if we were rejected on the grounds of not having sex? Would we be able to appeal or re-apply? I want to know worst-case scenario for everything, sorry

Thanks again so so much, this really takes a load off of my worries!

1) I have no source persay, but you can have a different residental and mailing address with CIC. I often advise people who will be moving during processing to give their mailing address as a trusted friend or relative. (I usually say parent, but that's not exactly going to work in your case.) Just remember, this person will get your mailings, which will have your application and UCI numbers - information used to access your file on the Ecas system (how to check your application's status).

You can update the address by contacting CIC and Ottawa directly. It's fairly easy to do, but I've heard it doesn't always work so well. You may want to pick someone with little/no chance of moving if all possible. (Of course, moving isn't always planned.)

She can list a Canadian address for her mailing address as well. I use a Canadian one for my mailing and residental.

2) Interviews are generally done when the VO wants to access the genuineness of the relationship - aka they suspect it's not a real marriage for one or both parties. Americans (and other visa exempt citizens) aren't generally seen as wanting/needing to enter a marriage of convience for immigration purposes because the USA (or whatever country) has similar standard of living/human rights, etc.

If you provide proof of a continuing relationship, there's very little chance they will call her.

3) You can appeal. What you're wanting to do is well within your religious rights to do. I can understand the VO being concerned about it - which is why you would need to educate him or her about your beliefs. (I. e., the letters from a priest.)

Personally, I wouldn't mention the sex part at all. It's personal - and yes, the VO has to pry somewhat into our private lives - but I feel that's more on a need to know basis. If they ask, you should be honest and present them with material that supports your stance. If they don't ask, let them be none the wiser. Most people I know have even edited out private "marriage" conversations from their proofs (whether it be about family, sex, money, whatever) just because some things are only meant for the married couple.

I also wouldn't mention the importance of being married in the Catholic church. Once again, let that be on a need to know basis. All they need to know is you are legally married. Do try to invite some friends at the very least. Have a cake, even if a small one. Make it look special, etc. Make sure there are pictures. (I find friends who are artists looooove being the photographer.) If the VO asks, then prepare to explain yourself - but most people wouldn't know that tidbit, so don't worry too much.

Worry about the marriage and application right now. Don't stress about the interview. If you have one, they will give you time to prepare (and you can order your casenotes to see why they need an interview). Anything Ottawa contacts you about, they will give you at least 60 days to reply, so you always have time to prepare a reply/statement/gather documents.

Ottawa is the US's visa office btw.

 

[parker24]

Hello everyone,

Although my account is fairly new, I have been reading through these forums daily for the past few weeks. I have come up with some questions because of the lack of information I have found in regards to our situation (perhaps that's a good thing since it means people haven't had such troubles before ).

My fiancée and I met on a dating website for Catholic singles. She is American and I, the Canadian citizen, wish to sponsor her as a spouse with an outland application. We plan to get married next month in her state and then have her do the medical in Toronto and then finalize our application package and submit it in July. I have a few questions, however.

1) We are young and have not visited each other many times (when we apply, she will have visited twice and I visted her three times). We are both out of college and I will probably have a low-income job to start with, so I plan to temporarily live with my parents to save money. My parents do not approve of us getting married yet, and they would especially freak out if they hear that we have had a civil (non-Catholic) wedding. I don't want to tell them about the civil wedding. They will therefore not be in any wedding photos and not provide a letter to support our relationship. Will this cause a problem and are we likely to need an interview because of this? Also, I need to provide a mailing address on the application. Can I put a friends' address down or does it need to be my own permanent mailing address? I do not want my parents to find out about this.

2) If we do end up needing an interview, the interviewer will probably ask why my parents do not know about our wedding. Is it ok to say we just wanted to have a small wedding since my parents would not approve unless we got married in the church? We plan to have a bigger wedding and a church celebration next year, but seeing as we met on a Catholic dating site it may be hard to explain why we got married civilly instead of in the church like our church requires.

3) Here's a point I am the most worried about. We are getting married civilly next month so that by the time our church wedding happens, she can move to Canada with me and we can live together and she can work at the same time. She intends to change her last name to mine at the civil wedding, get a new passport, and we plan to open a joint bank account to save up money for the church wedding ceremony. However, we are devoutly Catholic and will not have sex until we are married in the church. If they ask us about this in the interview and we say we aren't having sex because we can't until we're married in the church, will they deny us because they think we are not a legitimate marriage? We love each other very much and have lots of proof (emails, letters, presents, skype logs, etc.) but not much hard proof (life insurance, property lease together, etc. since we are poor and just out of school). We will not lie about anything on our application and if this will stop us from applying, we might as well wait until we are married in the church, but would like to avoid having to be apart after the church ceremony. I hope there is no problem with this.

I hope these are clearly worded and easy to understand. I thank you all so much for your patience and I hope you can pay-it-forward so that when I am done with this process, I can help others like me in the future

Glad to see Sir. Amikety has helped you out! Just wanted to reassure you on the visiting thing.

My husband and I knew each other from 2006, but he only visited me twice (Three times if you include the last time and then he decided to stay ahha) I never visited him AND he proposed to me on his first visit. So I think you'll be good.

As for the sex thing, a lot of people are CRAZY uncomfortable discussing that, I'm pretty sure they will NOT ask that as you can say yes and can't really provide any real proof of it (except perhaps, a baby haha). If by off chance they do, Catholicism is very widely known in Canada, so just by explaining that you are devoted Catholics is good enough.

And like dear Amikety said, chances of a US citizen getting an interview, is CRAZY low. American's gain nothing really by moving here, except the health care perhaps.

 

[kourts]

Thank you so much for your reply, it has been really helpful! Nice to know someone who was in a similar situation. Did you end up having to go for an interview? Also, you say to be honest about what we want. Well, really, we see the marriage as being valid and want to be able to live together asap, but we also see that the church does not see it as valid and will not have sex because of this. Would the officer be okay with this or would they think we are getting married just so she can come earlier to Canada instead of applying after the church wedding and therefore see it as fraud or something?

Thanks so much again!

We did not end up having to go for an interview, thankfully. Each officer is different though, like i said I got married in a court house because we didn't have the money and the time between getting engaged and married was 3 months. So not exactly a lot of time to plan for a big wedding either. I was a little concerned with them seeing this as being fraud as well because it happened so fast. But when you're in love you don't want to have to be apart, it's hard! So hopefully when they see all the proof they'll see that as the reason for you doing what you're doing.

No problem, I know how stressful this is and I had a million questions and concerns as well!

 

[amikety]

Glad to see Sir. Amikety has helped you out! Just wanted to reassure you on the visiting thing.

My husband and I knew each other from 2006, but he only visited me twice (Three times if you include the last time and then he decided to stay ahha) I never visited him AND he proposed to me on his first visit. So I think you'll be good.

As for the sex thing, a lot of people are CRAZY uncomfortable discussing that, I'm pretty sure they will NOT ask that as you can say yes and can't really provide any real proof of it (except perhaps, a baby haha). If by off chance they do, Catholicism is very widely known in Canada, so just by explaining that you are devoted Catholics is good enough.

And like dear Amikety said, chances of a US citizen getting an interview, is CRAZY low. American's gain nothing really by moving here, except the health care perhaps.

I only know of one American with an interview out of the entire spreadsheet and two threads for us!

 

[joeinkocha]

Thank you all again for your answers, it has been very reassuring. I haven't replied sooner because I've been busy finishing exams and applying for jobs (last semester of school, yay!).

Just a couple more questions.

1) After we're married, my wife will take my last name. We will apply for PR soon after so none of her documents will have my last name on them yet. Am I right in assuming we apply with her maiden name since that is what is on her documents?

2) Are photocopies of proof and identification (letters, passports, etc.) acceptable? What needs to be original? I feel like this would be an easy answer to find, however, I've had little luck.

3) I thought the paperwork was processed in Mississauga. Has it recently changed to Ottawa or was it always like this? Also, if we needed an interview, where would it be? I believe the closest visa office to both of us is Detroit, but since I'm from Toronto would I go to Ottawa?

 

[parker24]

Thank you all again for your answers, it has been very reassuring. I haven't replied sooner because I've been busy finishing exams and applying for jobs (last semester of school, yay!).

Just a couple more questions.

1) After we're married, my wife will take my last name. We will apply for PR soon after so none of her documents will have my last name on them yet. Am I right in assuming we apply with her maiden name since that is what is on her documents?

That's fine. I changed my name twice in the time of our application processing (I'm the sponsor) and it was no issue really.

2) Are photocopies of proof and identification (letters, passports, etc.) acceptable? What needs to be original? I feel like this would be an easy answer to find, however, I've had little luck.

You will see on the checklist what needs to be original. The police certificate is one of them.

3) I thought the paperwork was processed in Mississauga. Has it recently changed to Ottawa or was it always like this? Also, if we needed an interview, where would it be? I believe the closest visa office to both of us is Detroit, but since I'm from Toronto would I go to Ottawa?

Outland? You will send it to Mississauga, then when you are approved as a sponsor, it will go to Ottawa. They MAY send it to a USA office, but they also may keep it in Ottawa. I'm not sure with the interview thing.

 

[joeinkocha]

Thanks for such a quick reply parker24! That's pretty much all the questions I've got for now

 

[joeinkocha]

Hi again. Was reading the forums and came up with two more questions if anyone would be so kind to help

1) When I am crossing the border into the states, do I tell them I am going there to get married? I've heard that people get rejected if they say this. Should I just say I'm visiting? Won't this bring up a problem next time I want to come to the USA and they see I got married while I was there or will they not see that?

2) Once we're married and my wife comes to visit me, do we need to have the PR application sent in for her to be able to visit me? If she tells the CBSA officer at the border that she is visiting her husband, will they reject her?

Thanks in advance!

 

[Kay1]

i have read in one of the spousal sponsorship parts ont he canadian site that just because you don't have sex doesn't mean they will reject your app. there are many others who don't JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES wouldn't have sex.... other strict religious denominations etc. so i wouldn't worry about it. just explain that under your religious views sex before marriage is not Biblical. will try and find it for you

 

[osdamour]

Hi don't be so pessimistic with yourself...As an American your future wife can cross the border easyly she has just to say that she's going to see her husband. Do you know how many couples are cross the border to see their loved one? my wife did the same thing many time while I was studying in the US. The officier just did his routine work, that's all. Tell the truth and her too. For your application better wait until you guys get married. This might give you more time to collect additional proofs for you relationship