Good Evening ladies in waiting/first ladies,
The above titles must not be viewed as derogorotory. As long as I was wating I felt like the lady in wating and when hubby came I became the first lady.
I spend the entire day searching for cheap tickets to Jamaica and not to mention overpriced hotels. Tickets booked but no decision on the capitalistic hotel pricing. Can you recommend a good (inexpensive)place in Montego Bay, it must be all inclusive.(this request is perhaps a tall order) I know I deserve this trip but can't help thinking that it is wrong to spend $3000 on hotel alone. I keep thinking this is $252,000 Jamaican Dollars. The new year has brought me such grief and I must really get away to see if I can dull the pain. I feel like I am disappearing into nothingness.. need the Jamaican breeze to restore my joy. So I spent so much time worring to get hubby here and bearly a year later want to go home to where it first started.
As promised I said I would speak on the topic of "badmindedness". Well I hope I can have a candid conversation with you all and in turn will hope you will be honest. Although I was born in Jamaica and has only lived here 23 years I did not truly know what that word really meant until I asked a teenager to define the word she said "Jealous" Wow, so I said, so badmind is the ugly sister of Jealousy. I started to examine myself to see if this ugly gal ever spent time with me. I was alarmed when I did my research... I yelled "rass" when I realize I had not only hung out with her I allowed her to borrow my draws one time.
An older woman told me that she was best friend in jamaica with another lady. She said life was really hard on all of them. It was very common for women to have one dress and one baggy with many holes in it (I mean this kind of poverty) Anyway, one day she was so hungry and had nothing to give to her five kids so she decided to check her friend. She said when she got there the woman had just killed a pig and was putting salt on it to cure it. Well, ladies she said a ugly feeling took her over, which felt like hate.. she just could not understand this feeling because this woman did not even namh pork.
She ran home and begged God forgiveness. I also remember a college friend of mine had secured a job at a decent company before she even graduated. She of course called to bragg about it as my search was heating up. I was happy for her at first until she said its paid ONLY $16 and hour. She sound ungrateful to me and well a heavy feeling just drop down in my pumpum. I hated that b**** for complaining when I thought I would have given anything at the time to get a $12hrs job. Was this badmind kicking me in my pumpum? After I got off the phone I went for the tool closet and took the hammar and give the Punnash one lick and said I dont ever want you to do this again.
Is Jealousy and badmind the same people? Now which one of you here can say when you are celebrating someone amazing news that the process is over.. you dont thing I wish this was me? Can you tell me you have never judged someones process time and feel a little irritated with Kingston for sitting and farting all over your application? Is this badmind? Remember, before you answer I am using these words synonomously.
When is it ok to feel a little jealous or badmind over someone elses joy? Most of us will say Never. But what about the time when your uppity friend or family member tried to make you feel bad about your man and you later find out she was just jealous. Do you still hate her when you know she was secretly wishing she had your boo? It is such a thin line.. you know between these two expression. (more cultural if you ask me). We are all guilty on some level. Now if the ugly feeling in your pokie is there and you decide to buy expensive perfume to hide its stinking scent we may have a problem. You know like give bad advice that will cause someone to experience a delay in their process or do something to cause someones life to be in danger.. In this case you are not badminded just wicked/evil.
As soon as someone start showing this emotion it is usually about some insecurity going on in this persons life. Your success only works to trigger this persons fears of failure, lack, etc. Think of these things. I cant say I will never have feeling of jealousy. when it rear it ugly head,(it is not a good feeling) and dont feed it just pullout the hammar and give it a r*** lick. Just make sure it only spread out and not mash up for hubby will not stick around and then you are going to feel jealous/badmind when you hear susie talking bout her good na na. ciao!
http://youtu.be/-dTa_kO6TWE
