Now now, what is with all this sad behaviour? This isn't like us here.
Now, I don't know if any of you are religious or spiritual but I don't want to step over the line of another persons religion so let me know if I do.
Recently, I had been doubting my faith in many things and always felt where I grew up that you needed to believe. It mostly began after I had gotten saved and my grandpa (the greatest man/best friend) died. My faith had kept lingering since then. But then last week I told myself, I am not going to say I don't believe or that I do. I will leave my mind open to find it for myself. Then last night, I awoke from a nightmare of sorts. In this nightmare I was portrayed in another persons body but it was me (just didn't look like myself). I was running away from a man whom by being so many feet away could turn you to stone. I don't know the mans face but I know he was portrayed as a normal everyday man. I kept looking back and running as fast as I could. I guess my feet were caught in the vicinity of where he was because my legs broke at the thigh in mid stride of running but somehow I kept going. Almost as if my energy was pushing me and was remaining in the air and the rest of my body didn't fall. All in this dream I am running down a hall (a site from my high school) and towards the end I am running toward my destination, a doorway full of light. Before I woke up, somehow he turned my tongue to stone but not the rest of me. I don't know if I made it to that light but I figure it was up to me to find that out for myself.
I felt the sudden urge to call my mom, as I knew she would have the answer for me. While trying to figure the meaning behind my dream (because I don't ever have nightmares), she said maybe you were running from the devil (sorry for the bad word there) since the he can be portrayed as any face. And the only way he could stop you was to turn you to stone. And when he couldn't stop you from pushing on (cause I kept going after my legs broke) that the only other way he could do that was to turn your tongue to stone so that you couldn't express your feelings. But even after waking up, he couldn't stop you because you let your hand put pen to paper. (Because as soon as I woke up, I had to sketch what I saw because I am a designer of sorts) She said, "You are so strong-willed that no matter the circumstances you were under, you found a way to get through to that light." And when she explained all of this, I broke down to tears. It was EXACTLY what I had been searching for. I had found my faith again and ever since then I will not doubt it again. Not in myself, relationship, life, or God. My worries are carefree and I know I am safe. I also dreamt of my grandpa not long before that part of my dream and I had not dreamt of him in years. I believe this was his way of saying he is always with me and that I have reason to keep my faith and be with him again.
You may take this as you will but I think this dream could speak for everyone no matter if it is about faith in religion or about this process. No matter the circumstances, if you are strong-willed, you will find your way through these obstacles no matter how little or big. All of you need to find this spirit within yourself. So to keep my mind on track I will be painting the same sketch I had in my dreams because that girl was me and everytime I will look at it, it will remind me how strong I can be and that no obstacle is something I can't get through. I will also be putting them on clothes once I am allowed to sell my clothing again. I am not sure if this post will make sense or why I have rambled on but I feel that maybe this post will help you find that faith in yourself, your relationship, and this process. There is no obstacle we all can't get through especially together. I hope this reaches to all of you in some way.
P.S. If are wanting a sketch, clothing, or painting of this too because you feel it will keep you on the right track then let me know. I will do one for you. And no I am not advertising anything lol, just want to keep your spirits high and plus I don't want money for this at all. You're all my family. If it helps you then it helps me. PM me if you would like one though.