Desperate for an advice on our case

[inaina]

Hello to everyone,

Please don't get mad at me if you think that instead of doing my research I picked the easiest way - posting my story here and waiting for your advices and opinions now I've spent so much time reading stuff on internet, that my head is spinning now (I'm sure you're all familiar with this feeling). My boyfriend and I need to decide very soon on which way of immigration we're going to choose, so I'm afraid that we're just not capable of making a decision right now as we're still absorbing the information. I hope that you might share your opinions with us. We would be very grateful as we want to leave hiring an immigration lawyer as our last option.

Long story short
He's Canadian, I'm Lithuanian. We met almost 11 months ago in India. Spent 10 days together and after 3 months I came to Canada where I can stay for 6 months with no visa required. We kept in touch all the time when we weren't together, have lots of emails and a few calling cards. We lived together all the time since I came to Canada (almost 8 months). We don't have any legal proof that we have been living together, as his landlord would never allow the 4th person in the house, but have lots of pictures, facebook albums, my cellphone contract is under my boyfriend's name and soon I'll be on his health insurance benefits plan, plus he's been to my country (we don't have any pictures as a proof, but we have his plane ticket to Lithuania plus photos from Poland and Chezh Republic). All this time we've been trying to figure out if we want to be together and we finally know now where we stand and that we want to go ahead with my immigration to Canada. We don't mind getting married, but it would be so much better if we didn't have to do it. I'm extremely desperate to finally start working a.s.a.p. and go back to school (unfortunately can't afford to be an international student), so now we need to find out which is the quickest and the most guaranteed way for us to get my PR. It will be a year soon since we met, so could it be common law or conjugal partnership (from what I've read I know we're somewhere in between), getting married, applying outland or inland? I might have to go back to Lithuania in the next 2 weeks as I have a family emergency, so if the best way for us would be applying outland, maybe that would be the perfect timing as we could get married before I go and then apply? Or maybe conjugal partnership or common law would work a lot better for us, but I'm really confused about which one we're supposed to pick.

Please, let me know if you have any idea which way is the best for us.
Thank you in advance,
Ina

 

[maua]

"We don't mind getting married, but it would be so much better if we didn't have to do it. I'm extremely desperate to finally start working a.s.a.p. and go back to school (unfortunately can't afford to be an international student), so now we need to find out which is the quickest and the most guaranteed way for us to get my PR."

Therein lies your problem. This coming from an outsider who has nothing to gain from you either getting or not getting your PR - this sounds like a relationship of convenience. Just saying.

 

[diddagirl]

Based on the fact that you have no real evidence of living together in a common law relationship (such as lease, joint bank cards etc...) and since you havent been living together for a year- applying as common law is not an option for you at this point.

Honestly- I would recommend getting married.... why would it be better if you "didnt have to"..?

 

[mitamata]

Because it's always better to get married because you "want to" instead of because you "have to"

As said, you can't apply as common-law partners as you have not lived together for a full year yet. And with no evidence to show you've lived together, it would be a difficult thing to do anyway.

I would seriously advise against applying as conjugal partners, because it's a very tricky category. For one, you'd have to be in a conjugal relationship for at least one year and be able to prove it, which will be hard to do. And secondly, because the rules are not entirely clear on how to process such applications, you can't know how it will go - there are a lot of IOs out there that will not approve an application if the couple had the option to get married but chose not to or if they could've lived together to apply as common-law partners. Very tricky category, nobody can give you any guarantees on how it will go.

If you really want to be together, I would suggest getting married. It just makes the immigration process so much simpler.

And... maua is right, the way you put it does make it sound like you're only with the guy because you want to work/study in Canada. Be careful with how you phrase yourself when filling out your application.

 

[Juche]

Consider having the Canadian guy come and live with you in Lithuania before you go off and get married just because you feel like its something you have to do. Getting married is kind of a big deal, you might regret it later if its too hasty. Thats my 2 cents worth..

 

[whoopi83]

Consider having the Canadian guy come and live with you in Lithuania before you go off and get married just because you feel like its something you have to do. Getting married is kind of a big deal, you might regret it later if its too hasty. Thats my 2 cents worth..

I agree with Juche.

Also, this sounds awfully like a tricky way of obtaining residency for work and study. Not good if it is.

 

[ange]

Besides which, you may be desperately in a hurry to get to work and study, but there ain't no hurrying happening when you apply for PR! It's all about the wait

 

[Suin]

yes, getting married, could be a right way out of this situation.

 

[toby]

Interesting range of opinions and reactions to this post.

I interpreted the comment "we prefer not to get married" (or words to that effect) as a statement that they want to be married in their own good time, and not be stampeded into it to expedite a visa application. But many here thought it sounded like the visa was the motive for the relationship.

So, the advice to be careful in wording the application was sound.

The rest of this is an opinion about how flawed the application process is, so read only if you're interested in a moot discussion.

An initial interview of 15 minutes might clear up a lot of confusion, both for the IO and for applicants. Yet Canada requires a long paperwork exercise first, and only toward the end can the interview happen. If you think sbout ho muh time it takes to evaluate an application, a 15-minute interview to weed out the clearly-inadmissable applications would save Canada a lot of time.

Canada routinely send officers to inaccessible parts of foreign countries. Let them do the screening interviews then.

So, we try to submit perfect applications. We try to convey the nature of our relationships in writing and in the IMM forms. It cannot be done adequately, except maybe by Shakespeare. We attach documentary proofs of time spent together, lives joined together – and yet we sometimes realize we did not save boarding passes, hotel receipts etc etc. Does this mean the relationship is not real? Not at all. We lack documentary proofs BECAUSE we were not thinking ahead to visa requirements when we met, but rather we were getting to know a wonderful person, trying to decide whether to take a most important step – starting a permanent relationship.

Who has the foresight to amass all the documentary proofs from the beginning? The scam artists – so practised in the art of deception – who plan the visa application from the beginning. So, perversely, a perfect application should be viewed suspiciously as a sign of premeditation, calculation rather than normal romance, while an imperfect application should be viewed as a sign of being genuine.

End of rant.

 

[diddagirl]

Who has the foresight to amass all the documentary proofs from the beginning? The scam artists – so practised in the art of deception – who plan the visa application from the beginning. So, perversely, a perfect application should be viewed suspiciously as a sign of premeditation, calculation rather than normal romance, while an imperfect application should be viewed as a sign of being genuine.

End of rant.

Although I can appreciate your frustration that you don't have some of the documents that the CIC may desire, the idea that "perfect" applications are premediated and fraudulant is ridiculous.

I believe that I sent in pretty close to a perfect application, complete with proof of almost every single plane ticket from our visits to each other (spanned over 6 years), proof of travels together etc... Did I keep this stuff because we knew we would need it or "planned" his immigration to Canada from the start? Of course not, we are both simply sentimental people and because of our long distance situation, every trip and every moment we spent together was special.... so I kept everything he ever gave me and various sentiments from our trips (including itineraries) in a box as it all meant alot to me. Come time we decided I would sponsor him, I simply hauled out my "special box" and low and behold we had tons of proof right there.

Absolutely nothing "calculated" about our situation that should cause "suspicion"..... now is there?

 

[toby]

Nothing suspicious in your case, Diddagirl, but how many people keep boarding passes and hotel receipts over many years as mementos? Surely not many. You were lucky that you kept them; but you do admit it was not premeditated, not with a visa in mind. Had you been thinking "visa" right from the beginning, I as an IO would look more closely at your motive.

So no, I don't think it is at all "ridiculous" to suggest that perfect applications be viewed as more suspicious than imperfect ones. This is not to say that all perfect applications are necessarily fraudulent; I did not say that, and I think you'll agree if you'll read my posts more carefully.

 

[kittty]

Well said toby! I completely agree, and diddagirl I think you are misunderstanding the point toby is trying to make. He is not saying all applications that happen to have a large amount of documentation are phony, the point intended was instead that it is forgivable to NOT have a record of all those items as it is not natural for everyone.
I, like you, happened to keep a lot of those things over our 8 year relationship, but as I have lost people in my life I am extremely sentimental about little things. Not everyone is the same though, and there is no one rule for every circumstance, that is why the whole application process is in place. So they can review and make a decision based on each individual case.

Inaina- I don't think anyone should get married just for the sake of it, it is a serious committment that can have huge ramifications. Yes, being married usually makes the process easier but you do not HAVE to be married, that is why there are other classes for application- common-law, conjugal, skilled worker etc etc...
Keep in mind that the people reviewing your application have hearts and minds and reason. Provide whatever proof you can and if you feel that it's not enough get testimonies from your friends, your family, your doctor, ANYONE who can confirm you are in an honest committed relationship. Have the letters signed and notarized with their contact details. Write your own testimony explaining your situation.
Most importantly you're going to have to learn PATIENCE. Anything worth having in life is worth fighting for. If you really want to live in Canada and you really want to be with this guy you will have to make sacrifices. I'm not sure you're fully aware of the time and patience the whole process takes. If you're not prepared to wait then you can just forget about it. In the meantime you can start gathering your proof.
Good luck whichever path you choose.

 

[diddagirl]

Nothing suspicious in your case, Diddagirl, but how many people keep boarding passes and hotel receipts over many years as mementos? Surely not many. You were lucky that you kept them; but you do admit it was not premeditated, not with a visa in mind. Had you been thinking "visa" right from the beginning, I as an IO would look more closely at your motive.

So no, I don't think it is at all "ridiculous" to suggest that perfect applications be viewed as more suspicious than imperfect ones. This is not to say that all perfect applications are necessarily fraudulent; I did not say that, and I think you'll agree if you'll read my posts more carefully.

Regardless of what my actual motive was when I kept these things, the IO has no way of knowing that either way, so they would have to be suspicious enough to look into it further because we had sufficient proof of our relationship?
Don't get me wrong, I don't think visa offices should scrutinize relationships if they dont have proof of every flight they claim to have taken, or receipts from every hotel they stayed at etc.., but rather they should be looking at the application as a whole and consider all of the contents (not just documentary evidence) when they make their decision.

 

[toby]

Well, Diddagirl, we do agree that a IO needs more than documentary evidence to truly judge a relationship. This is why -- in case Immigration is looking for new ideas -- I suggested elsewhere that there be a 15-minute screening interview with every applicant before beginning the application process, to assess precisely those aspects of a relationship that cannot be conveyed by hotel receipts, photos (genuine or faked) etc etc.

Would this be feasible? I think so. Visa offices send officers into the field to conduct in-depth interviews. They go only every 6 months in some cases, but at least they go. And if they could thereby weed out the more obviously-false applicants, then they'd have more time to process the genuine cases (with perfect or imperfect documentation), and reduce waiting times. At least it's worth considering.

Hello, Immigration. Listening? (I thought not.)

 

[diddagirl]

Well, Diddagirl, we do agree that a IO needs more than documentary evidence to truly judge a relationship. This is why -- in case Immigration is looking for new ideas -- I suggested elsewhere that there be a 15-minute screening interview with every applicant before beginning the application process, to assess precisely those aspects of a relationship that cannot be conveyed by hotel receipts, photos (genuine or faked) etc etc.

Would this be feasible? I think so. Visa offices send officers into the field to conduct in-depth interviews. They go only every 6 months in some cases, but at least they go. And if they could thereby weed out the more obviously-false applicants, then they'd have more time to process the genuine cases (with perfect or imperfect documentation), and reduce waiting times. At least it's worth considering.

Hello, Immigration. Listening? (I thought not.)

Feasible, yes... but this is the government we're talking about!! They love to make processes with no rhyme or reason simply to make our lives more difficult (I'm convinced)