age differences
- Thread starter tysgran
- Start date
Chances are that this will be a reason for an interview of your husband by the visa office. The best advice I can give you is to ensure your husband is well prepared for the interview. There are plenty of threads on here discussing interview questions for spousal sponsorships. Study these.
Have you applied yet? Also, have you considered hiring someone to assist you with preparation of the application? It's not necessary BUT it can be helpful when you know there are red flags on your file (like the age difference) to have someone experienced with what the visa offices are looking for to assist you with this in preparing submissions and organizing your evidence.
Have you applied yet? Also, have you considered hiring someone to assist you with preparation of the application? It's not necessary BUT it can be helpful when you know there are red flags on your file (like the age difference) to have someone experienced with what the visa offices are looking for to assist you with this in preparing submissions and organizing your evidence.
thanks for the help - much appreciated.
the application will be ready to submit next week. I will be going to visit my husband in October. If he went today for an interview, I have no doubt he could answer most if not all of the questions I have seen here. Family and friends were at the wedding - many many photos etc phone and email records bank records of money transferred to him.
He did not even know my age until we signed the papers for our wedding ceremony and I never asked his - the only important thing was how we felt about each other. I also have 3 letters from outsiders attesting to the relationship who know us both apart and together.
thanks again
the application will be ready to submit next week. I will be going to visit my husband in October. If he went today for an interview, I have no doubt he could answer most if not all of the questions I have seen here. Family and friends were at the wedding - many many photos etc phone and email records bank records of money transferred to him.
He did not even know my age until we signed the papers for our wedding ceremony and I never asked his - the only important thing was how we felt about each other. I also have 3 letters from outsiders attesting to the relationship who know us both apart and together.
thanks again
I read somewhere on this forum that even though it's unfair, officers tend to look a little more closely at the relationship when the woman is much older than the man, instead of the other way around. Apparently it's fairly common for older men to sponsor younger women.
Yes, older men sponsoring younger women is often just fine, because of course women are attracted to men twice their age. But if an older woman is sponsoring a younger man, then that man is OBVIOUSLY a scammer and he's just using the poor woman to get into Canada. That is often how CIC seems to feel.
Yes, age will definitely be a factor. Unless you've been together a looong time and have tonnes of evidence, then he can start preparing for an interview. Also... he didn't know your age until you were married? Oh, that doesn't sound good. Personally, I believe you that it just didn't matter to you, but if you say he didn't know your age, then that's ... well, it doesn't really say you knew each other well when you got married.
May I ask, how did you two meet each other?
Yes, age will definitely be a factor. Unless you've been together a looong time and have tonnes of evidence, then he can start preparing for an interview. Also... he didn't know your age until you were married? Oh, that doesn't sound good. Personally, I believe you that it just didn't matter to you, but if you say he didn't know your age, then that's ... well, it doesn't really say you knew each other well when you got married.
May I ask, how did you two meet each other?
I have to agree with the other suggestions that tons of evidence will be needed - but I'm sorry to say - how can a couple get married and not know each other's age??? [It might suggest to the I/O how well did they in fact know each other .] not trying to be discouraging, but it raised a flag with me, I'm sure it would with an I/O.
Evidence to the validity of ur relationship and how it evolved is what I would focus on heavily....as well as family/friend support [from both sides] in the form of letters, stating how they saw the relationship evolve etc....will help greatly.
I am much older than my spouse, and we did not have an interview - but we did show how the relationship evolved well, had familial support from both sides, same religion, culture, etc... to our advantage.
Good luck!
Evidence to the validity of ur relationship and how it evolved is what I would focus on heavily....as well as family/friend support [from both sides] in the form of letters, stating how they saw the relationship evolve etc....will help greatly.
I am much older than my spouse, and we did not have an interview - but we did show how the relationship evolved well, had familial support from both sides, same religion, culture, etc... to our advantage.
Good luck!
midwifemia
Full Member
- Sep 2, 2009
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Hi,
We also have a large age difference, with me (female, English) being the older one at 35, and my partner (male, Canadian) being 20 years old. We worked together and were good friends for 8 months before we got together - I was initially concerned about the age difference but eventually I had to admit we had fallen in love and since then it's not mattered to us one jot. His family are fully aware and have been since before we were a couple - they have no problem with it at all and we will be living with them once we return to Canada. We will have statements to this effect as support. We are planning to have children when we get settled too - he is very mature for his age and I am still a teenager at heart! Most people who meet us as a couple don't even realise there's an age difference until we tell them.
I have a friend who used to work for an immigration lawyer in Edmonton and she didn't seem to think it would be a problem for us at all, so I hadn't thought about the issue of an interview, but now I am revising that!
So far the evidence we have collected consists of: emails between us from when we were apart for 10 weeks (prior to our year of living together consecutively), skype records showing 2-3 phone calls per day also from that period, plane tickets showing that we met up in LA and flew onwards to NZ together and purchase confirmation showing I paid for his ticket, seat confirmation showing that we sat together (I have my boarding card but his is missing), birthday cards to each other, a wedding invite to both of us, a christmas card from my sister & niece to us both, car registration & insurance documents showing us as joint owners, joint tenancy agreements, joint bank account statements, an email between his mother & I showing we are friends, around 50 photographs of us together including a few of me with his family and I'm gathering statements from my family, his family and several of our friends. Will this be enough do you think?
In order to demonstrate the genuine nature of our relation, I also want to make sure my statement of how our relationship evolved covers all the bases. I'm not sure how 'formal' it should be; though I want it to state facts and dates, I also want to demonstrate some of the emotional side of the relationship - after all, that is what makes it a relationship - but equally I don't want to be inappropriate, obviously. How have other people written these? Should I mention/discuss the age difference, or play it down? Should I mention our future plans for children, or is this unneccessary? Any tips would be gratefully received.
Thanks guys,
Mia
We also have a large age difference, with me (female, English) being the older one at 35, and my partner (male, Canadian) being 20 years old. We worked together and were good friends for 8 months before we got together - I was initially concerned about the age difference but eventually I had to admit we had fallen in love and since then it's not mattered to us one jot. His family are fully aware and have been since before we were a couple - they have no problem with it at all and we will be living with them once we return to Canada. We will have statements to this effect as support. We are planning to have children when we get settled too - he is very mature for his age and I am still a teenager at heart! Most people who meet us as a couple don't even realise there's an age difference until we tell them.
I have a friend who used to work for an immigration lawyer in Edmonton and she didn't seem to think it would be a problem for us at all, so I hadn't thought about the issue of an interview, but now I am revising that!
So far the evidence we have collected consists of: emails between us from when we were apart for 10 weeks (prior to our year of living together consecutively), skype records showing 2-3 phone calls per day also from that period, plane tickets showing that we met up in LA and flew onwards to NZ together and purchase confirmation showing I paid for his ticket, seat confirmation showing that we sat together (I have my boarding card but his is missing), birthday cards to each other, a wedding invite to both of us, a christmas card from my sister & niece to us both, car registration & insurance documents showing us as joint owners, joint tenancy agreements, joint bank account statements, an email between his mother & I showing we are friends, around 50 photographs of us together including a few of me with his family and I'm gathering statements from my family, his family and several of our friends. Will this be enough do you think?
In order to demonstrate the genuine nature of our relation, I also want to make sure my statement of how our relationship evolved covers all the bases. I'm not sure how 'formal' it should be; though I want it to state facts and dates, I also want to demonstrate some of the emotional side of the relationship - after all, that is what makes it a relationship - but equally I don't want to be inappropriate, obviously. How have other people written these? Should I mention/discuss the age difference, or play it down? Should I mention our future plans for children, or is this unneccessary? Any tips would be gratefully received.
Thanks guys,
Mia
First things first- Age is just a number. Love has no restrictions and no borders. So for the poster here GOOD LUCK.
If I was the Immigration Officer I would be alerted on the age difference- however there is an important element that would need to be focused to overcome this issue and that simply is:
How long you have dated and how it all started.
Of course the fact he is from a poor island like Cuba is a concern for the IO-- if he was from a wealthy Island like Bermuda or a country like the USA the age issue would not be as big of a concern....however I hate to say his country of citizenship will have an impact as well.
But for me I wish you luck--however I hope you guys have been dating at least two or three years.....
If I was the Immigration Officer I would be alerted on the age difference- however there is an important element that would need to be focused to overcome this issue and that simply is:
How long you have dated and how it all started.
Of course the fact he is from a poor island like Cuba is a concern for the IO-- if he was from a wealthy Island like Bermuda or a country like the USA the age issue would not be as big of a concern....however I hate to say his country of citizenship will have an impact as well.
But for me I wish you luck--however I hope you guys have been dating at least two or three years.....
midwifemia, your case is quite different and I expect you will have less problems. For one, the sponsor is the younger man. The perception is that of course an older woman would like to be with a young man, but the young man is obviously scamming the older woman. In your case, it's the "older woman" that is immigrating and your motives will not be as suspicious as they would be if it was your partner immigrating.
Secondly, you're English. And the situation in the UK is quite different than in Cuba. You don't really have an economic reason to want to go to Canada, you won't be that much better off there, while it's a huge step up for a person from Cuba.
I think you got enough evidence to show your relationship is genuine. It's certainly more than most people send in. As for your statement of your relationship... be as formal as you like. Mine was semi-formal. I didn't really get too much into the emotional part much, I focused more on explaining the circumstances of our relationship (we met online and lived apart until after I got PR). But you can do it however you want - the goal is to make the IO see you have a genuine relationship so write whatever you feel would get that across best. Personally, I'd mention the age difference at the beginning and your initial concern about it explaining how you dealt with it. Beyond that, I don't think you need to get more into.
Oh, and try to keep this statement a reasonable length. An IO is more likely to read it properly if it's 3 pages long than if it's 20 pages
Secondly, you're English. And the situation in the UK is quite different than in Cuba. You don't really have an economic reason to want to go to Canada, you won't be that much better off there, while it's a huge step up for a person from Cuba.
I think you got enough evidence to show your relationship is genuine. It's certainly more than most people send in. As for your statement of your relationship... be as formal as you like. Mine was semi-formal. I didn't really get too much into the emotional part much, I focused more on explaining the circumstances of our relationship (we met online and lived apart until after I got PR). But you can do it however you want - the goal is to make the IO see you have a genuine relationship so write whatever you feel would get that across best. Personally, I'd mention the age difference at the beginning and your initial concern about it explaining how you dealt with it. Beyond that, I don't think you need to get more into.
Oh, and try to keep this statement a reasonable length. An IO is more likely to read it properly if it's 3 pages long than if it's 20 pages
Suin
VIP Member
- Sep 14, 2008
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Thanks everyone for all of the advice and I have heard all of the horror stories and I have my eyes wide open.
Let me clarify a couple of things. We have been married now for 18 months. It is obvious by my appearance that I am older than my husband - he know I was older and I knew he was younger - we just didn't exchange numbers because after we talked about it - we both decided it didn't matter. And we knew at the time that it would be an issue for others and we also discussed that but again it didn't matter. We are both intelligent university graduates. We share the same profession - we have much in common and both very family oriented.
Secondly it was never out intention for him to immigrate here. I was going to spend 6 months in Canada and 6 months in Cuba but last winter when I was there living with him in his house - I went to the immigration office to have my visa extended. That is when I was given 1 hour to move out of the home and into a hotel or a casa particular. They did nothing to me other than make me move but they threatened my husband with huge fines and jail. It scared the shit out of him. That is when we found out about the idiosincrities of the Cuban law and immigration department. Now I had engaged and paid for 2 different Cuban lawyers in the process of getting married there. No one told us in all of the preliminary planning of the wedding about this law. I was also in the Cuban Consular office on many different occassions in getting papers and notarized translations etc prior to the marriage. No one told me there about this peculiar law. They were all very happy to take my approx $3000 all together. They were supposed to be working for me and have my best interest at heart but that is not the case - the money was always the objective!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He loves his country and his people and they gave him a fine education. However, he does not own his own home. He rents a home. Under Cuban law I can not live with him in any home other than one he owns or is owned by a direct family member. I can live with his mother but she is 3 hours away from where he works and lives. There is no bus from his mother's to where he lives other than one for Cubans. It is against the law for me to travel on the Cuban bus.
Imagine our frustration finding out that they would could not live under the same roof! We could live in a hotel and/or a Casa Particular but we can not live in a rental. The cheapest rate is 25 CUC per night. Who can afford approx $33 per night for 6 months. I sure can't.
So what choice did we have if we want to be together. We want to be in the same country, in the same city, in the same house under the same roof as any other married couple is allowed to live!
So here we are at the immigration process and trying to establish that the relationship is genuine.
By the way I have approximately 1200 emails between us and another 50 letters and cards sent by snail mail and courriers - how much of that should I print and submit?
hope that clears up a few things and thanks again for all the info.
Let me clarify a couple of things. We have been married now for 18 months. It is obvious by my appearance that I am older than my husband - he know I was older and I knew he was younger - we just didn't exchange numbers because after we talked about it - we both decided it didn't matter. And we knew at the time that it would be an issue for others and we also discussed that but again it didn't matter. We are both intelligent university graduates. We share the same profession - we have much in common and both very family oriented.
Secondly it was never out intention for him to immigrate here. I was going to spend 6 months in Canada and 6 months in Cuba but last winter when I was there living with him in his house - I went to the immigration office to have my visa extended. That is when I was given 1 hour to move out of the home and into a hotel or a casa particular. They did nothing to me other than make me move but they threatened my husband with huge fines and jail. It scared the shit out of him. That is when we found out about the idiosincrities of the Cuban law and immigration department. Now I had engaged and paid for 2 different Cuban lawyers in the process of getting married there. No one told us in all of the preliminary planning of the wedding about this law. I was also in the Cuban Consular office on many different occassions in getting papers and notarized translations etc prior to the marriage. No one told me there about this peculiar law. They were all very happy to take my approx $3000 all together. They were supposed to be working for me and have my best interest at heart but that is not the case - the money was always the objective!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He loves his country and his people and they gave him a fine education. However, he does not own his own home. He rents a home. Under Cuban law I can not live with him in any home other than one he owns or is owned by a direct family member. I can live with his mother but she is 3 hours away from where he works and lives. There is no bus from his mother's to where he lives other than one for Cubans. It is against the law for me to travel on the Cuban bus.
Imagine our frustration finding out that they would could not live under the same roof! We could live in a hotel and/or a Casa Particular but we can not live in a rental. The cheapest rate is 25 CUC per night. Who can afford approx $33 per night for 6 months. I sure can't.
So what choice did we have if we want to be together. We want to be in the same country, in the same city, in the same house under the same roof as any other married couple is allowed to live!
So here we are at the immigration process and trying to establish that the relationship is genuine.
By the way I have approximately 1200 emails between us and another 50 letters and cards sent by snail mail and courriers - how much of that should I print and submit?
hope that clears up a few things and thanks again for all the info.
Hi there- Wow the Cuban systems sounds insane. I would just do the best you can to note as much as you can that marriage is based on love and nothing less or more. You should be fine--- I really hope it works.
Be positive and I don't think it will be as big of an issue. Just submit a good application and if he is asked for an interview so be it.....
Be positive and I don't think it will be as big of an issue. Just submit a good application and if he is asked for an interview so be it.....