Hi, I'm currently practicing for my IELTS writing test, I would really love it if you guys would take a look at my essay and let me know if there are some things I could do better.
Question:
In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education.
What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work?
Response:
It is found that in certain countries in Europe students attend school to enhance their real-world knowledge in order to attain jobs when they grow older, whereas, other students would rather gain a more general academic education. This essay mostly agrees that while students should get a more academic style of education, it is important to also attain real world skills that would help them in the future.
Firstly, it is beneficial for students to get an academic education because it enables them to choose a field which they would like to devote their time and focus toward. Secondly, because in order for these students to attain a higher education, for instance if they would like to pursue a college or university degree, they would need that initial background academic training. I believe that it is of paramount importance that students attain an education that would allow them to learn the fundamental and rudimentary concepts of the world.
Provided that students are also taught more practical applications of those concepts, and how they can be applied to the real world. Schools these days just provide the fundamentals in a theoretical approach, while, in order for those fundamentals to have an impact, they must also learn its practical usage. Take for example the system used at Karachi Grammar School in Pakistan, the students, alongside their usual curriculum students must also partake in choosing courses that are separate from their regular classes.
To conclude, I believe that, while it is definitely important for students to receive training in an academic sense, it also behooves schools and other educational institutions to provide for them vocational and real-world training as well, so that they are well equipped to take part in the job market.
Question:
In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education.
What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work?
Response:
It is found that in certain countries in Europe students attend school to enhance their real-world knowledge in order to attain jobs when they grow older, whereas, other students would rather gain a more general academic education. This essay mostly agrees that while students should get a more academic style of education, it is important to also attain real world skills that would help them in the future.
Firstly, it is beneficial for students to get an academic education because it enables them to choose a field which they would like to devote their time and focus toward. Secondly, because in order for these students to attain a higher education, for instance if they would like to pursue a college or university degree, they would need that initial background academic training. I believe that it is of paramount importance that students attain an education that would allow them to learn the fundamental and rudimentary concepts of the world.
Provided that students are also taught more practical applications of those concepts, and how they can be applied to the real world. Schools these days just provide the fundamentals in a theoretical approach, while, in order for those fundamentals to have an impact, they must also learn its practical usage. Take for example the system used at Karachi Grammar School in Pakistan, the students, alongside their usual curriculum students must also partake in choosing courses that are separate from their regular classes.
To conclude, I believe that, while it is definitely important for students to receive training in an academic sense, it also behooves schools and other educational institutions to provide for them vocational and real-world training as well, so that they are well equipped to take part in the job market.
