Messed up personal situation as I wait for Processing.... need some advice

[inc]

Ok, so here it is... :'(

I applied to sponsor my common-law partner in March.

She lived with me here in Canada for over a year so we could achieve common-law. Then at the end of last year she went back to Brazil to wait. We finally applied for her Application OUTLAND.

A couple weeks after, in April she decided to break up with me, said she didn't want to be in a relationship anymore. I think she still wants to come to Canada though, not sure. The distance hasn't helped us and we haven't been talking much anymore. Now today I log on to CIC and the application which went to Ottawa instead of Sao Paulo is showing as Decision Made.

Now I'm completely lost and don't know what to do because...

1) I don't know what the next steps of the process are from here on and how long they take... and if she has already gotten any notification, or mail about it... we haven't been communicating, so all I know is what the CIC status portal tell me. Any enlightenment on this part would be great.

2) Obviously I'd like for us to make up and for her to come and be with me, but I don't know if she stills wants that.

3) At the same time, I don't want her to receive PR and come to be by herself here (possibly without me even knowing), especially because if we're not gonna be together, I don't want to loose my ability to sponsor someone else in the next 3 years. Is it too late for that?

I don't know whether I should contact CIC to withdraw the application or if I should wait to see what happens with her. Besides being heartbroken by the situation, I'm completely distraught and confused right now. I thought I was gonna have some more time to think about this, but I was surprised by the DM today.

What do folks on here think I should do about all this? Any advice on my situation is appreciated. Thank you.

 

[setec-astronomy]

That's a tough one. It sounds like a really hard situation to be in, and I'm sure all of us are sympathetic. So, we can tell you functionally how to do things, but not what to do morally, ethically, or for your own mental and emotional well-being.

You do not want to be financially responsible for her for 3 years if she enters Canada as a Permanent Resident with you as her sponsor only for her to live alone. Weigh the financial responsibility there very heavily.

Functionally, it's very easy to inform CIC (and CBSA, if you're concerned she might be able to land before CIC can withdraw things) that the relationship has broken down, and she has left you. If you need to do that, you should do it. She can find other ways to come to Canada. If you reconcile, it might be harder, but you could sponsor her in the future.

It might be good for you to visit her, if you're able to, and to see if you can reconcile without her landing. If she has Condition 51 attached to her PR, you can even inform CIC of the breakdown in the relationship after she lands, but best not to let things get that far, probably.

I wish you the best, and am sorry that you find yourself in this situation. I hope that you can reconcile with her, since that is what you seem to want, and that whatever happens with your relationship that you are able to find some resolution quickly, and not suffer any lasting effects beyond heartache and regret. It's a painful situation, but it doesn't need compounded by financial or legal difficulties, and you have it in your ability to prevent that.

 

[canadianwoman]

I'm very sorry to hear that you are having problems with your relationship.
What date did you send in the application? Is the 'decision made' for the sponsor part only, or for the whole thing? That is, have you already received approval as a sponsor? It sounds like you have, if it has already been sent to Ottawa.
If this is the final decision, not just the decision about the sponsor, you have to decide what you want to do quickly.
You can contact CIC and the visa office to tell them that you have broken up and do not want to sponsor her anymore. However, if you hope to reconcile with her, doing this will mean it will be almost impossible to sponsor her in the future. I guess you don't know how she feels, so don't know what would be best.
If she lands and becomes a PR, you will be responsible for her for three years - which basically means that if she goes on welfare, you will have to pay the government back. You will also not be able to sponsor anyone else for three years.
She will probably have Condition 51 on her PR, which means that she has to live with you for two years after landing, or else her PR could be rescinded. However, you would have to tell the government that she is not living with you. They don't always do anything about this - they are supposed to, but lack the manpower it seems.
Technically, since she has broken up with you, even if she gets the PR visa, she is supposed to tell the visa office or the border agent when she comes to Canada that her situation has changed - i.e., that she is no longer in a relationship with the sponsor. In that case, her visa should be revoked. Again, though, if she does want to come live in Canada, she could just lie.

Maybe you could contact her and tell her the decision has been made and ask if she wants to try to get back together. Maybe the thought of being apart for a long time made her want to break up, and now that it turns out that it is not such a long time, she would be willing to try again.

 

[crzy_canadian]

First off, sorry to hear about your situation.

Secondly, you either need to contact her ASAP and talk to her to see what she wants, OR you need to contact CIC and inform them of the relationship breakdown immediately. If your gf makes it to Canada and goes on welfare you're liable; if CIC finds out about the deteriorated relationship occurred before her entrance to Canada you could be charged with misrepresentation, which also carries serious consequences.

Either way, act now, do not 'wait and see'.

Good luck my friend, stay strong.

 

[inc]

That's a tough one. It sounds like a really hard situation to be in, and I'm sure all of us are sympathetic. So, we can tell you functionally how to do things, but not what to do morally, ethically, or for your own mental and emotional well-being.

You do not want to be financially responsible for her for 3 years if she enters Canada as a Permanent Resident with you as her sponsor only for her to live alone. Weigh the financial responsibility there very heavily.

Functionally, it's very easy to inform CIC (and CBSA, if you're concerned she might be able to land before CIC can withdraw things) that the relationship has broken down, and she has left you. If you need to do that, you should do it. She can find other ways to come to Canada. If you reconcile, it might be harder, but you could sponsor her in the future.

It might be good for you to visit her, if you're able to, and to see if you can reconcile without her landing. If she has Condition 51 attached to her PR, you can even inform CIC of the breakdown in the relationship after she lands, but best not to let things get that far, probably.

I wish you the best, and am sorry that you find yourself in this situation. I hope that you can reconcile with her, since that is what you seem to want, and that whatever happens with your relationship that you are able to find some resolution quickly, and not suffer any lasting effects beyond heartache and regret. It's a painful situation, but it doesn't need compounded by financial or legal difficulties, and you have it in your ability to prevent that.

Thank you Setec-astronomy for your kind words. Funny enough, I was sending you a PM as you were posting this, asking about the procedure after DM.

Really appreciate your help, and I think I will try to visit her before making a final decision on this, it will all depend on whether the timeline will allow for it.

 

[inc]

Thank you all for the support. I look forward to updating the thread in the near future with how things have evolved. Hopefully good news.

 

[mikeymyke]

Whatever you do, think through your decision very carefully. Sponsorship isn't something to be taken lightly as it carries a big financial and emotional burden. You have to be absolutely 100% sure she's the one you want to be with long term.

If you have any doubts at all about your future with her, don't go through with the sponsorship.

 

[Mightytonewheel]

This is a very, very tough situation. I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you.

From what I understand, it's not too late to withdraw an application until the principal applicant has landed in Canada. I could be wrong about this, so a call to CIC is definitely in order.

I would also be extremely cautious about continuing a sponsorship arrangement with someone who does not intend to continue the relationship. It could lead to all kinds of problems. I am not sure what would happen if CIC discovered the relationship ended before she landed in Canada -- but I would be concerned about the potential consequences. I think it would be very risky to allow her to come to Canada without you knowing.

Good luck.

 

[Hasan9999]

1.A direct conversation with your partner in person may yield a positive result! The sooner the better!
2. Otherwise you have to inform CIC about your breaking up. No other choice, unfortunately! It seems that you are still missing her a lot. Analyse the reasons why the relationship deteriorated and try to resolve as best as you can. But again time is a crucial factor here!

Good luck!

Hasan9999

 

[IsAJo]

That is definitely a difficult situation and my heart goes out to you! It is a really hard process in the first place to have it fall apart so close to a conclusion.

I agree with the others above. Contact or visit your [partner?] and communicate where you both are, where you both stand, is there still foundations in your relationship, is this something you both can build up from. I would recommend considering this situation over a little time so that you know that you are observing the details in a fair frame of mind.

If the relationship does not have enough grounds to overcome this hurdle, then CIC will need to be informed. Being liable for someone for so many years and risk of misrepresentation would make things a lot harder in the future.

I really do hope things work out for you!

 

[Kashfool76]

That is definitely a difficult situation and my heart goes out to you! It is a really hard process in the first place to have it fall apart so close to a conclusion.

I agree with the others above. Contact or visit your [partner?] and communicate where you both are, where you both stand, is there still foundations in your relationship, is this something you both can build up from. I would recommend considering this situation over a little time so that you know that you are observing the details in a fair frame of mind.

If the relationship does not have enough grounds to overcome this hurdle, then CIC will need to be informed. Being liable for someone for so many years and risk of misrepresentation would make things a lot harder in the future.

I really do hope things work out for you!

You are absolutely right!!

My question is why OP waited so long towards rebonding the relationship ? Whe he didn't pay attention to his application with CIC ?

Hope the problem resolves soon!

 

[inc]

Thank you all for your help and support.

Just to clarify, I didn't wait long. The application process went through super FAST. We submitted application March 18 and go DM on May 5th.
My partner informed of her change of feelings mid-April and we didn't talk about the PR application since then.

I know I need to talk to her now, especially because CIC portal says correspondence was mailed on May 5th, and since she is visa exempt and we had a complete application, that means she is probably gonna get the COPR directly overseas in the next few days.

Right now I'm just so angry and confused about it all. Of course I'd like to mend things, but now I'll always have a feeling in the back of my head that even if she comes, she might do it just to get the PR. Also, because her medical was done this year, technically she'll have almost 1 year to land, and the burden will be on me to decide to call it quits and call CIC to withdraw. So confused....

 

[Ponga]

Since she will likely have Condition:51 on her COPR, that would be something that you could use to your advantage if you choose not to take action now.

Unless and until the new government removes conditional PR (which would be a big mistake, IMHO), she will be required to live with you as a genuine partner for 2 years beyond the day that she lands. If she, somehow, enters Canada and lands before you contact CIC/CBSA, or even with your knowledge, and doesn't reconcile, you could report her for non-compliance.

 

[mikeymyke]

You should definitely report her to CIC/CBSA to revoke her PR.

 

[Rob_TO]

Since she will likely have Condition:51 on her COPR, that would be something that you could use to your advantage if you choose not to take action now.

Unless and until the new government removes conditional PR (which would be a big mistake, IMHO), she will be required to live with you as a genuine partner for 2 years beyond the day that she lands. If she, somehow, enters Canada and lands before you contact CIC/CBSA, or even with your knowledge, and doesn't reconcile, you could report her for non-compliance.

I imagine when the Liberals get around to officially removing Condition 51 (which is just a matter of time), they will also apply that move retroactively to everyone who has already landed. So I wouldn't count on this at all. Need to make the choice before the applicant lands and becomes a PR, if it's something the sponsor wants.