Just out of curiousity: How did your family feel about you getting married?

[ColorMePanda]

Just thought it would be an interesting subject to talk about.

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner?

2. Were they scared for your two to first meet?

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.? Did you go by them and if not how did your family react to you not doing so?

4. How does your family feel about your partner?

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married?

AND JUST FOR CUTENESS
6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like? (pictures are nice too if you have any)
Feel free to add anything you want. I will probably write mine a little later once I know I won't be the only one to post. Lol.

 

[tgchi13]

1) My parents we the last of 'my' people to know, because I thought they would be upset. In fact the first question my mom asked when I showed the ring needed clarification: Was I leaving? Now, a few weeks later she's uber excited and making suggesting and comments about how to make it easier in case I end up needing to move.

2) No they weren't scared. My mom wanted me to go for it. Because I'd never know if I didn't try. I was the one who was scared!

3) No. Not raised like that.

4) They feel that they want me to be happy and if I'm not happy without him them they can't be happy. Overall, they like him. Or at least like how I feel about him. This one is difficult to explain.

5) I invited them out to breakfast (my dad couldn't make it) and toward the end of the meal I said to my mom I have to go over to the jewellers to have my rings resized...

6) You can't post pix here I don't think.

Did your partner propose Panda? If so, congrats and I think, in your case, after all this you should just tell your parents. They've probably been waiting for it.

Socially speaking, Americans and Canadians are so close in culture and all else that using the term 'Foreigner" is incorrect. We as countries and as people are growing so much more similar each day that there is little foreign left.

 

[mitamata]

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner?

Only one person was against it and that's my mom's boyfriend. And the only reason he was against it is because he was certain it wouldn't work out and I shouldn't move to Canada. But he wasn't too serious about it, so it didn't ruin anything. The rest of my family and friends were happy for me, though not too happy about the fact that it would result in me moving to another continent. I'm lucky, I have one of the most supportive families around. They'll support anything that would make me happy

2. Were they scared for your two to first meet?

I flew to Canada to first meet my boyfriend whom I had been talking online to for almost 1 year at the time. My mom was feeling very nervous about it, mostly because she was worried that if the meeting went badly, I would be stuck in Canada for 3 weeks feeling miserable and alone, but she knew it was something I had to do. Thankfully, the worst never happened. The rest of my family were like 'huh, so you're really going? Have fun!'
His mom wasn't too keen on the idea though. She thought we should just keep talking online for a couple of years. Probably because she was afraid that her little boy (18 yrs old at the time) would have *censored word* xD She's very... ummm... well, let me put it this way. If we were in his room, the door had to be open at all times. If it wasn't, she came to the door, knocked and reminded him to keep it open. Fun stuff.

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.? Did you go by them and if not how did your family react to you not doing so?

No and no. We did have a fairly traditional wedding for our country, probably the same as it would've been if I had married someone from my own town. But that was cause we both wanted it that way. My husband is christian, I'm atheist. We didn't get married in a church, but my husband was fine with that. So was (somewhat surprisingly) his mom - she's VERY christian, she's the administrator of her church and very religious. I was surprised to hear she didn't feel a church wedding was necessary. She said you don't need to be in church to be before God

4. How does your family feel about your partner?

They love him. 'Oh, he's so cute and so nice and so lovely!' Sometimes I think they like him more than me! xD
Except for my mom's boyfriend, but the only beef he has with him is the whole 'moving to another continent' thing.

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married?

Hmmm. I don't remember. It wasn't exactly noteworthy, everybody knew it was coming, we had been together for 4 years at the time. I just showed them the ring and ... that was about it. No big deal
The only ones who didn't like it were, again, my mom's boyfriend and my husband's mom - when she heard he had bought the ring to propose to me, she had a little 'chat' with him. Said that maybe instead of making it an 'engagement' ring, he should give it to me as a 'promise' ring. She was worried that he's too young to get married, he was only 21 at the time. I didn't like hearing about that, lol. Heck, I'd prefer to just live together first too, but with immigration stuff, that would be a bit hard to do. We couldn't afford me to just live with him for a year without working. So her saying 'don't get married yet' translated to me as 'don't live together yet' and I didn't not react kindly to that at all. We were already looking at living apart for more than 5 years, I could barely take that much as it was.

6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like? (pictures are nice too if you have any)

He was visiting with me at the time. One day, he cooked us dinner and after we were done eating, he got on his knees and pulled out the ring. The rest is a bit of a blur, I was too nervous for the brain to function, even though I knew he had bought a ring, lol. One thing I'll never forget though, I wasn't quite done chewing, so I still had salad in my teeth! xD

He had asked me for my ring size a couple months earlier, so it wasn't much of a surprise. It was a gorgeous ring, just the kind I'd pick out for me - thankfully we have the same taste in jewelry. And it fit!

 

[Miryam]

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner?

No. But they wanted us to move to my country of birth (I was living in another country when met and married my husband).

2. Were they scared for your two to first meet?

We didn't know we would meet each other. We met at an airport, between flight connections.

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.?

No.

4. How does your family feel about your partner?

They love him.

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married?

I sent them an e-mail.

AND JUST FOR CUTENESS
6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like? (pictures are nice too if you have any)
Feel free to add anything you want. I will probably write mine a little later once I know I won't be the only one to post. Lol.

He sent flowers and a note asking if I would marry him. Next time we met, he proposed again, this time with the ring, at a restaurant.

 

[bobshynoswife]

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner? YES - absolutely. They still are. The problem is not that he's a foreigner, the problem with my family is that he is black. My mother is horrified that her white, Alberta born daughter will be marrying a black man, and not just a black man, but an AFRICAN man.

2. Were they scared for your two to first meet? They didn't know about it! So no, they weren't scared. My mom is still afraid he is trying to scam me (because he is from Nigeria) even though we have been together for 19 months and he has never asked me for a single dollar.

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.? Did you go by them and if not how did your family react to you not doing so? I'm Catholic, and he is Protestant, which my mom seems to think is a real problem, since we are 'different religions' which i think is a total double standard since my Catholic brother is married to a JEWISH woman! LOL!!

4. How does your family feel about your partner? Since CIC will not grant him a TRV to meet them, they have no idea, but can only gossip and speculate about him.

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married? Oh crap, I didn't tell them for 6 months! When I told my mom we were dating, she stopped speaking to me for 7 months, so I finally told her on the phone just before Christmas.

AND JUST FOR CUTENESS
6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like? (pictures are nice too if you have any)
He lives in London, and we went on a mini-break to Brighton so I could see the sea (I am a landlocked Albertan!). He proposed to me there, with a simple and gorgeous solitaire ring. EXACTLY what I would have wanted, it's so pretty, and looks great on my hand. And it fit perfectly! How he knew my exact size is beyond me...he must have really paid attention to my hands! I tried to post a pic, but can't figure it out. Can anyone else tell me how to do it? I tried embedding a link from photobucket, but it said links were not allowed.

 

[ColorMePanda]

Aww reading your answers made me smile. So you had to deal with the whole "mother-in-law" thing too while you were living in their home. Everything you said about your husbands mom is what I am dealing with now. We aren't engaged yet but I am getting the hint that he is about to. I know everyone else will love it but his mom flips out about EVERYTHING. It gets so hard pleasing both of us and her too. I am so afraid of her reaction when we tell her about us wanting to get married this summer. She is not going to be too happy. She must think I am the devil. Plus the fact that we are still quite young doesn't help much.

 

[ColorMePanda]

Did your partner propose Panda? If so, congrats and I think, in your case, after all this you should just tell your parents. They've probably been waiting for it.

Socially speaking, Americans and Canadians are so close in culture and all else that using the term 'Foreigner" is incorrect. We as countries and as people are growing so much more similar each day that there is little foreign left.

Nope not engaged quite yet but I am getting strong signals that he is going to propose on Valentine's Day because he wants to rent a room and take a couple of days off work for it sooo...yeah I am thinking it might be then. Eeep...getting excited.
I will definitely let everyone know when it happens.

Oh and the last bit you put, that is so true. There really isn't all that much "foreign" between countries anymore or well at least between the US and Canada. Moving to Canada from the States is just like as if I moved to another state. Not a lot of diversity.

 

[tgchi13]

Nope not engaged quite yet but I am getting strong signals that he is going to propose on Valentine's Day because he wants to rent a room and take a couple of days off work for it sooo...yeah I am thinking it might be then. Eeep...getting excited.
I will definitely let everyone know when it happens.

Oh and the last bit you put, that is so true. There really isn't all that much "foreign" between countries anymore or well at least between the US and Canada. Moving to Canada from the States is just like as if I moved to another state. Not a lot of diversity.

Thanks mitamata!

Picture is before resizing. I was *sure* I wore size seven, not 5 1/4...

 

[ColorMePanda]

By the way everyone in here has VERY nice rings.

 

[mitamata]

Aww reading your answers made me smile. So you had to deal with the whole "mother-in-law" thing too while you were living in their home. Everything you said about your husbands mom is what I am dealing with now. We aren't engaged yet but I am getting the hint that he is about to. I know everyone else will love it but his mom flips out about EVERYTHING. It gets so hard pleasing both of us and her too. I am so afraid of her reaction when we tell her about us wanting to get married this summer. She is not going to be too happy. She must think I am the devil. Plus the fact that we are still quite young doesn't help much.

No, see, I had a condition on my move to Canada: my husband had to move out of his parents' place first. Don't get me wrong, I love them (one a bit more than the other >_>), but... well, let's just say I like them better when they live a 20 minute drive away, lol! My mother-in-law is very... helpful and full of advice. I see her about once a week and in that one visit I get all the "advice" I can handle xD
So yeah, I never lived with her. Compared to living with her, a long distance relationship was the less painful option.


As for posting pictures: you have to upload it somewhere else and then use the Insert Image button on this board. I use imageshack: http://imageshack.us/
Just upload the image and then use one of the links provided. I use the 'direct link', the end result in the post should look something like this:

[IMG]http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/8501/funnydogpicturesmaybedi.jpg[/IMG]

I think it should work with images hosted on photobucket as well.

And tgchi13 ... wow! What a rock!

 

[tgchi13]

No, see, I had a condition on my move to Canada: my husband had to move out of his parents' place first. Don't get me wrong, I love them (one a bit more than the other >_>), but... well, let's just say I like them better when they live a 20 minute drive away, lol! My mother-in-law is very... helpful and full of advice. I see her about once a week and in that one visit I get all the "advice" I can handle xD
So yeah, I never lived with her. Compared to living with her, a long distance relationship was the less painful option.


As for posting pictures: you have to upload it somewhere else and then use the Insert Image button on this board. I use imageshack: http://imageshack.us/
Just upload the image and then use one of the links provided. I use the 'direct link', the end result in the post should look something like this:

[IMG]http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/8501/funnydogpicturesmaybedi.jpg[/IMG]

I think it should work with images hosted on photobucket as well.

And tgchi13 ... wow! What a rock!

I agree with the bit on mother-in-laws! My partner's mother-in-law is one of my best friends, and she wants the best for me but can be difficult (as can we all!) I won't have a mother-in-law (she's deceased) so he's all mine!

The picture is two rings, it's the engagement solitaire that my partner wanted and the engagement band that I wanted that will now be my wedding band. What I did was send out that picture, as an email announcement to friends that said only:

We've been waiting for it/them to arrive and it/they came today:

then the picture inserted

Yup.

I forgot the proposal part. It was on the phone just before 8am and I was telling my partner how the MP's office had said to me a couple of weeks prior that we'd have done better if we'd gotten married. And the proposal was 'why don't we anyway' "get married?!" 'yeah'. I received the formal proposal, which I almost screwed up, on my birthday over dinner - he was talking about the past five years and near the end I interrupted and said "yeah, and look where the @#$% that's gotten us, right back where we started" 'ummmm...that's not where I was going with this' and I looked at him and said "do you want the ring" and he said 'I was going to ask, but now it's awkward' and he said 'will you marry me' and I said 'yes Sir!' and then I told him that was the one and only occasion that I will ever call him Sir!

I have small hands's miamata, but it sure is pretty )

 

[ColorMePanda]

I forgot the proposal part. It was on the phone just before 8am and I was telling my partner how the MP's office had said to me a couple of weeks prior that we'd have done better if we'd gotten married. And the proposal was 'why don't we anyway' "get married?!" 'yeah'. I received the formal proposal, which I almost screwed up, on my birthday over dinner - he was talking about the past five years and near the end I interrupted and said "yeah, and look where the @ #$% that's gotten us, right back where we started" 'ummmm...that's not where I was going with this' and I looked at him and said "do you want the ring" and he said 'I was going to ask, but now it's awkward' and he said 'will you marry me' and I said 'yes Sir!' and then I told him that was the one and only occasion that I will ever call him Sir!

Haha omg that is definitely something that would happen to me. I can just see it happening. Lol.
Aww but that made me giggle. Are you getting excited about your wedding coming up? Where are you having it?

 

[kc416]

Just thought it would be an interesting subject to talk about.

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner?

In the beginning yes, mainly because i had failed to tell them in detail about my long distance love affiar until I had decided to get married so it was a bit of a shock to them. But i told them this is a time where they need to trust me.

2. Were they scared for your two to first meet?

I had visited my husband in his country about 6 times before we decided to get married after we had initally met.

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.? Did you go by them and if not how did your family react to you not doing so?

My husband is very religious - christian. and my mother is quite religious - catholic. So my mother was extremly happy that he was religious concidering i had stopped attending church prior to meeting my husband.

4. How does your family feel about your partner?

my family loves my husband... he is everything that any mother would wish for for their daughter.

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married?

i took my mother to a toronto FC game and after a few pre game pints i said... hey mom, do you feel like going on vacation in January.. she said sure... i said good... because im getting married.... she thought i was joking... it took her until half time and a few more pints to finally figure out that i was for real.... (i do have a jokey side to me)

AND JUST FOR CUTENESS
6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like? (pictures are nice too if you have any)
Feel free to add anything you want. I will probably write mine a little later once I know I won't be the only one to post. Lol.

my husband proposed over the telephone while we were both staring at the full moon..... hubby had some rings in mind but he forwarded me money and i bought my own engagment ring because i had seen one that i really liked. Totally not the typical kinda engagment... but i feel no ways about it at all....

 

[tgchi13]

Haha omg that is definitely something that would happen to me. I can just see it happening. Lol.
Aww but that made me giggle. Are you getting excited about your wedding coming up? Where are you having it?

I certainly can be obtuse. We may have been the only two diners speaking english , so maybe no one else didn't have a clue what an idiot I'd made of myself!

I became enchanted with the idea of Casa Loma, and it was available, but I didn't want to take a chance with my partner being refused at the border. We've picked a lovely little bed and breakfast for the ceremony and dinner, and if the weather is good, we'll be married outside by the pool with our dogs in attendance.

Excited? Not per say, having this to look forward to in seven weeksbut it's the only thing that's keeping me as barely grounded as I am right now. And then the wait begins again.

 

[Asta]

1. Were your family/parents/siblings against you marrying a foreigner?

our relationship was mostly via distance so even if i talked many times bout my husband to mom or dad or bro they never believed till the end that its true, our plans and everything. they dont have believe in long distance relationships. so they were laughing at it mots of the times. but they were not against. its just that its really far to leave from my family. thats the biggest minus.

2.
Were they scared for your two to first meet?
i know my dad was haha. dads always worry bout their lil girls. my dad called next morning from other city at 8am and asked if everythings ok, since we were meeting in my country.
everything was more than ok

3. Are they strict on cultures, religion, etc.? Did you go by them and if not how did your family react to you not doing so?
i am caucasian my husband is asian, but myfamily doesnt have any issues to that. as long as he is a good man.

5. How did you tell them that you were engaged or getting married?
i told them via skype when i was with him in Canada. actually i was a bit scared to tell them. and they couldnt say anything since i was far away and i am big girl so aslong i am happy they are happy

AND JUST FOR CUTENESS
6. How did your partner propose and what was the ring like?
our proposal was simple but i like it. i dont like any fancy or american style proposals (no offence, our culture and customs are different). so he was visitting me in my country. first day of our visit we were in our hotel room hugging and cuddling after a year staying apart and he simply asked me will i marry him. thing is we already knew that we gonna marry and he was picking me up to Canada from my country but i never heard those words from him "eye to eye" till that day. and yea there was no ring cause before i told him that theres no need. though he wanted to buy it. we better save up on more important things. i like to save up and the engagement ring u were till wedding, right? n our wedding was in a month so whats the point to buy n wear for a month then put it onto shelf? and another thing is i dont like wearing rings much haha but i love my wedding ring