Heartbroken

[lindz]

Thank you for all your advise and answering all my questions.

I am sad to say that after a year of trying to be together, my fiance' has decided to call it quits before I even got to Canada. I love him so much, but he says there is too much work involved to get me there and he cannot face it.

It feels like my heart has been torn out of me.

I wish you all the best of luck with your applications and pray none of you have to face this feeling of rejection.

 

[sogwap]

The stress of bringing new husband and wife together is a huge stress.

In one sense be glad it has happened now and not after you are married. I've been here in Canada as a visitor for over six months after getting married to my new Canadian bride. Because of the legal status of not working we are on the verge of separation. I never dreamed marriage between a US and Canadian spouses could be that difficult.

 

[lindz]

So sorry to hear that. It must be hard for a man not being able to work. He earned enough that I did not need to work, but would have as soon as I could have.

If you truly love each other, you will find a way to work things out.

Hang in there, the two of you can do it. True love always finds a way

 

[michaelab]

I am so sad to hear what happen to you.

I think one day he's going to regret that he didn't try hard enough to make the relationshiop work and how he missed the opportunity to be with a woman who cared about him so much!

Please take care

 

[lindz]

Thanks Michaelab,

I wish this pain would just go away, and that he would wake up in the morning and say he has made a big mistake. I so wish it was all a bad dream but it isnt. I have not cried so much in years.

 

[michaelab]

There is a good chance that he would wake up and realize that he had made a mistake for breaking up the engagement. Many of us on this discussion board know how stressful it can be during the long distance relationship on top of the immigration process.

I hope he realizes soon he's made a big mistake to let you go..if he doesn't its his loss. But I would not throw away any paperwork yet.

 

[missmyhoney]

sorry for what happened to you. it may take some time to heal the pain. but now can be a good time for u to meet a better guy rather than get stuck with someone who dumps someone as easy as that

 

[canadianwoman]

I'm so sorry to hear what happened. My heart goes out to you. Spousal sponsorship is a very stressful process; I'm surprised more people don't break up while waiting. Maybe he will change his mind.

 

[Lois Lane]

Wrapping you up with love and warmth!

You said it best "If you truly love each other, you will find a way to work things out."

Loving someone and not having them love you back the way you need to be loved, is unsustainable.

Pamper yourself and indulge yourself with anything that makes you feel a little happier so you can get through this with grace.

True love sees no end!

 

[lindz]

I wish he would wake up and realise what he is doing is so wrong, it was a love so beautiful, one of a kind that does not come around often.

Not sure how I am going to get through this, so lonely where I am with no support.

Thanks for all your best wishes.

 

[boyee6576]

I am so sorry to hear of your pain lindz. You know I think just about everyone has thought about giving up at one point or another if only secretly and for a split second, but something keeps pushing us on ward and living in hope that one day all this will be over and finally be together. I think the stress of all this immigration thing can overwhelm people but as we know you have to be strong. Maybe in your case he is just overwhelmed with just wanting things to be finalized. I think once he thinks about it and as another poster said, starts to miss you he will change his mind and realize that love is what gets you through this nonsense and its love that is worth fighting for. Hopefully you two can talk about this situation and it can be resolved. My heart goes out to you and praying for you.

big hug

abby

 

[lindz]

Thank you everyone.

This is so hard to deal with, I really thought that he loved me. He once said that he will fight for me no matter what, and always gets what he wants. Maybe he has met someone else, I guess I will never know the full truth. I do still hope he will wake up but he is very stubborn.
It all came as such a big shock, Friday discussing our new lives together and next day........I cant marry you.

Love
Linda

 

[nj123]

Linda,

Firstly, I'm really sorry to hear this. Unrequited love is a bitch and it hurts especially after getting to the point of engagement.

My, now, wife and I had a long distance relationship for 1.5 years while dating. I'm in South Africa. We met in SA and she went back to Calgary for work. We worked around the 8-9hr time difference and spoke at least once a day and often twice a day. She gave up her work in 2008, moved to SA to be together and we got married in Canada last year.

Frankly, his reason for breaking up sounds very lame IMHO and you are better off with someone else. I know this is much, much easier said than done.

I wish you a speedy heart-break recovery. Take care of yourself.

Regards

 

[lindz]

Hi,

We are both ex South African's as well, him being in Canada for 8 years and me in NZ for 2 years. We knew each other from school and hooked up again a year ago after my divorce.

The more and more I think about it now, I think he has met someone else and cant tell me.

Thanks for all your support.

Still totally heartbroken

 

[iarblue]

My heart breaks for you.Im so sorry.Hope all the best for you i couldnt imagine ever having this done or to do it .