Divorce after Sponsorship

[canuck_in_uk]

Please help. I'm 25 years old married to a 33 year old man. We've been married for 18 months and things would often get ugly. I've been mentally abused but tried to fix everything even by seeing a family counselor, which I thought had helped until my parents came to visit and he disrespected them and me in front of them. I see that I'm not the person he wants me to be. I don't take care of the house the way he would want me to, I smoke and am not active as he would like me to be. I'm focusing on work and school, which he doesn't understand, or does but thinks it's not enough. I have been changing things and myself for him for 3 years, but understand that whatever I do he will never be satisfied. We're almost at the end of the sponsorship process and he should receive his PR in 2 months. I don't have it in me to just cancel the application and send him back home, I'm just not that kind of person. Just can't picture myself doing something like that to anyone. Don't get me wrong, we have had good times and there are/were feelings involved, I just don't think I can handle this anymore.

I own a house and a car, he has nothing and has nowhere to go. I want to avoid any legal actions in the future. We live in Quebec and I don't know what right he has. I'm currently waiting for an appointment with a lawyer. I don't make that much money to support him separately. My salary covers the mortgage, bills and car payments, at the end I only have $500/monthly after all of the expenses. He hasn't worked during the time we've been married because he doesn't have a work permit. I'm confused and upset. I can't ask him to leave because I understand that I'm responsible, I do love him but my love won't save us at this point. Please advise.

If the relationship breaks down but you still go through with sponsorship, it is fraud.

Also note that you would be financially responsible for him for 3 years. Given what you've said, it is likely that he would go on welfare, which you would be required to pay back to the Canadian government. If he's on welfare for the full 3 year undertaking, you will end up owing tens of thousands of dollars.

You need to withdraw the sponsorship process ASAP

 

[Buletruck]

You need to withdraw the sponsorship process ASAP

Agreed......with all of the above. Despite not currently having it in you, based on what you have said, I suspect he would not hesitate for a moment to walk away after he receives his PR. If he's genuinely that disrespectful and uncaring, why wouldn't he? Claim support, claim on your house, collect welfare......pretty good life for him.......you not so much. Best to look out for yourself now than continue dealing with it after he hangs you out to dry.

 

[spousalsponsee]

I agree with the others. Continuing your relationship would neither be healthy for you, nor valid for immigration purposes. The whole point of spousal sponsorship is to be together, which you do not want. It isn't some route into Canada as a reward for enduring a relationship of a certain length.

If you continue, not only will you be committing immigration fraud, you will be making yourself financially liable for three years for another person who is abusive towards you.

You should withdraw your sponsorship immediately.

 

[divorsing]

Thank you, I was lost and confused but you're right. I'll do it today.

 

[carolbb23]

Thank you, I was lost and confused but you're right. I'll do it today.

Cancel it and he's using you