About Had It.

[Ravcat]

Yep Ive had it. I want to just quit this process, go get a job and move on.

Yep.

I am sitting here, in Texas, with nothing to do waiting for months/years for this process to go through. While my husband is in Ontario with a full time job, friends, etc.

I think we can let the process continue, or whatever, and he can apply to come to USA, go through fingerprinting/physical, etc like a criminal, and I can just move on.

I love my husband but this is just getting the better of me. I am to the point where I dont care anymore.

I quit my job for him, lost contact with friends, etc over this whole ordeal. And I am moving away from my parents and brother, friends, my clubs, activities, etc...

Just :'( feeling like 1 big mistake. And everyday worse and worse.

 

[Celandrius]

If you're still in the states why not get a job while you wait? It is going to take you a bit longer, Ottawa is finally starting to move again, so give it a bit more time! It's extremely worth it. Or you could go stay with your spouse in Canada while you wait as well.
The waiting is definitely dreadful, but you'll get there!

 

[boris4c]

I have a hard time understanding what forced you to quit your job, lose your friends, and so on, all before getting an answer and knowing that the procedure would take some time.

 

[DanSlh]

Sorry to ask, but why have you lost your job and friends?
Well... you can find a job while you wait or you can travel and be with him while you wait.
It's really painful and stressful but you can do this as a couple, not by yourself.
Keep your mind busy, it'll help a lot for sure.

 

[taffy7]

I'm sure their are times when we all want to quit.You just applied in December ,June and July applicants from the US are only just getting approved .You have some time to wait. Go visit your husband if you can and wait for your papers in Canada.

 

[scylla]

I have a hard time understanding what forced you to quit your job, lose your friends, and so on, all before getting an answer and knowing that the procedure would take some time.

Agreed. Sounds more like a relationship issue than an immigration issue.

 

[Amalthea]

Yep Ive had it. I want to just quit this process, go get a job and move on.

Yep.

I am sitting here, in Texas, with nothing to do waiting for months/years for this process to go through. While my husband is in Ontario with a full time job, friends, etc.

I think we can let the process continue, or whatever, and he can apply to come to USA, go through fingerprinting/physical, etc like a criminal, and I can just move on.

I love my husband but this is just getting the better of me. I am to the point where I dont care anymore.

I quit my job for him, lost contact with friends, etc over this whole ordeal. And I am moving away from my parents and brother, friends, my clubs, activities, etc...

Just :'( feeling like 1 big mistake. And everyday worse and worse.

Forgive me if I'm misunderstanding, I don't know your story - but if you've only just applied in December - Stay strong. You can do this!!!

Plus, if you're still in Texas.. you can work, go to school, hang out with your friends etc.... keep yourself busy until you're done. It will be sooner than later. What's a few more months in the scheme of your entire life? Soon this will be all behind you.

If you want your husband to come to the States and you don't want to go to Canada, then that's a whole different ordeal. You should go to Canada because you -want- to, not because your Spouse is FORCING you to uproot for him. It should be mutually agreed upon.

 

[surleplateau]

I just saw your post How often do you check for an update on your status?

No wonder you are going crazy if you check ECAS so many times per day/week!

I felt like I was going crazy for a few weeks while waiting for my CSQ (for Quebec). Honestly, it was better for me to step away from this forum and from dwelling on the issue instead of mentally pacing back and forth, back and forth.

It sucks when it feels like your life is "on hold" while your application is silently descending through the CIC processing black hole.

I strongly recommend that you find something else to focus on during the waiting process. There has to be something else you can do with your time besides this "waiting game."

 

[Ravcat]

Kinda a complicated thing. I will try to shorten it.

Living in small down. Commute to city for job. Friends in city. Future-Hubby wanted me to "visit" Canada for few months. Have great idea to go to Canada, after quitting job, etc. Get rejected at border for having no ties to states. He proposes to me. We get married 1 year later.

My town has no good jobs in it, thats why I went to the city. My brother came home from the AirForce, and has been using my vehicle for work, leaving me with no car for work or anything.

Because all this was going on, and I couldnt go to see my friends in the city...not much to do there. Just FB friends now

I do love my hubby, but at times it feels like I have given up everything.

 

[Ponga]

It's unfortunate that you had a very bad plan, that obviously didn't work out, but...you can't blame Canada for that mistake now.

Quitting your job and picking up as if you were moving to Canada [waaaaay too soon], was an obvious mistake, right?


Keep focusing on the big picture, as you watch the weeks (not months like many people) fall off the calendar...inching you closer to your PR!

 

[automaton82]

Kinda a complicated thing. I will try to shorten it.

Living in small down. Commute to city for job. Friends in city. Future-Hubby wanted me to "visit" Canada for few months. Have great idea to go to Canada, after quitting job, etc. Get rejected at border for having no ties to states. He proposes to me. We get married 1 year later.

My town has no good jobs in it, thats why I went to the city. My brother came home from the AirForce, and has been using my vehicle for work, leaving me with no car for work or anything.

Because all this was going on, and I couldnt go to see my friends in the city...not much to do there. Just FB friends now

I do love my hubby, but at times it feels like I have given up everything.

I am very sorry to hear the pain CIC is causing. They are pretty good at that sometimes.

It does seem like part of the issue is that your brother is using your car, which is completely unrelated to your spouse. Maybe try to figure things out with your brother first?

You should try to hold on and keep hope. I applied for my spouse in December 2013, and finally now received a decision. We were together the entire time though which I think did make a difference, even if my spouse couldn't work or travel outside the country...

 

[Applechunks]

It's unfortunate that you had a very bad plan, that obviously didn't work out, but...you can't blame Canada for that mistake now.

Quitting your job and picking up as if you were moving to Canada [waaaaay too soon], was an obvious mistake, right?


Keep focusing on the big picture, as you watch the weeks (not months like many people) fall off the calendar...inching you closer to your PR!

Ponga, I'm always a fan of your posts.

 

[VioletBlue]

Seems lime your brother is causing you to not be able to see your friends...Can't he get his Own car??

Kinda a complicated thing. I will try to shorten it.

Living in small down. Commute to city for job. Friends in city. Future-Hubby wanted me to "visit" Canada for few months. Have great idea to go to Canada, after quitting job, etc. Get rejected at border for having no ties to states. He proposes to me. We get married 1 year later.

My town has no good jobs in it, thats why I went to the city. My brother came home from the AirForce, and has been using my vehicle for work, leaving me with no car for work or anything.

Because all this was going on, and I couldnt go to see my friends in the city...not much to do there. Just FB friends now

I do love my hubby, but at times it feels like I have given up everything.

 

[Amalthea]

Yep Ive had it. I want to just quit this process, go get a job and move on.

I am really sorry you're feeling so depressed - of course you are! Your partner is in Canada, you have no job or school to keep you occupied/distracted, you can't see your friends, etc.. But hang in there! You are so close to being done... We all know what you're feeling right now! At least, I do!! I was feeling the exact same way towards the end. Felt stuck in my little town, and I didn't want to be there.

Also.. it sounds like, even if you quit the process.. you wouldn't be able to just go get a job and move on as you think would solve all your problems! If your brother has your car, and you want to work in the city.. you'd still be stuck in your town, with no job, depressed, and no car. Immigration in process or not!! You gotta find a way to keep yourself busy girl! Get a job in your town, get your car back, start volunteering at an animal shelter and walk some lovely dogs or pet some cats.. Anything! You'll drive yourself nuts sitting there all day getting inside your own head

You might have to put your own mental health before your brother's transportation needs. And that's OKAY! "Secure your own mask before securing the mask of others."

You are a citizen of the US, you have the freedom and the power to move where you want, work where you want.. it's not easy! But, honestly, if I were you, I'd go crash with my friends in the city and go out for a pint or two and explore and travel around until my immigration was done! If you've got a few friends there, you could stay with them and switch it up until the process is done? It seems like that's where you want to be, anyway. I'm sure they'd love to spend some time with you before you move to another country!! Plus, if you're staying with friends in the city, even couch surfing, you could grab a job to earn money, rent a room in the city temporarily..... etc. You have options <3 Don't be afraid to take chances, it's exhilarating! You're stronger and more resourceful than you even realize.

It'd be one thing if you were stuck in Canada and couldn't work, with no friends, etc.. but girl you're in your hometown! Use what little resources surround you to have a good time over the next few weeks while your application finishes up There are so many opportunities, so many options! You just have to take some chances If you want to be in the city right now, make it happen! Start applying for jobs, etc.. they don't need to know that you're leaving for Canada

 

[jesmithers]

Stay strong love. I've just sent in my application mid-April and I'm already feeling blue and I know I have a long way to go. You've put in your application in December! You're probably half-way in already and it seems you've been through a lot so you're definitely a strong lady.

You got this! Keep your chin up, try and talk with your hubby as much as you can and try and take care of yourself (do things you enjoy doing). Each day you're just getting closer and closer I always imagine the day we finally cross the border together..I'm thinking I'll cry lots and lots of happy tears.

Lots of love, like I said...keep your chin up!!!